XP has not had contact with DS for almost 4 months, I don't know whether this is a permanent abscence or not, as he hasn't been in contact with me either, and according to his mother, nobody even knows where he is living at the moment.
DS stopped asking about him a few weeks after he last saw him, and I haven't brought the subject up again, because I found it upsetting to see DS upset when I said I didn't know when his dad was next seeing him. I don't know though whether this was the right thing to do. I also have a DP who I have been seeing for about a year and DS has known since before then, who has recently moved in, and DS has made comment on a few occasions that DP is "like a mummy". We have always called DP by his name rather than introducing any "Dad" labels, and we haven't suggested to him that DP is "like a daddy" rather than a "mummy", mainly because I have a weird feeling that it would be wrong to impose this on him. But am I being ridiculous? He called XP's girlfriend "Mummy", by the way, and also his childminder is "Mummy", but I think these were mainly because of having their own small children around who would of course call them Mummy as well. Often DS refers to CM as hername-Mummy and me as myname-Mummy.
So I don't know whether to bring up the concept of his dad, or just wait until he asks. I don't have pictures of him around the house or anything like that, don't have him as a friend on facebook, so pictures never come up by chance. It's likely if XP continues not to have contact that DS will just start to forget him, but I don't know whether that's really bad? I wonder if it will be when he starts nursery (next January) and comes into contact with lots of other children that the subject might come up.
Ugh anyway, I've rambled when it's really very simple. Should I make an effort to bring up the subject of DS' father with him, at his age, or should I wait until he asks?