If my ex moves away from the kids do I have an obligation to take them to him??

5 replies

jufa · 21/05/2011 17:04

Can anyone please clarify. If my ex moves away from the area (about 60-70 miles) am I in anyway by law obliged to take the kids at least half way to where he lives. He cant, due to his living arrangements, have them overnight, and having been very unreliable is now saying the only way he will consider seeing them is if i travel half way and sit in the car and wait while he spends the day with them and then I bring them home. He claims to have looked into it and says I need to do this. Is he talking nonsense?

OP posts:

Marne · 21/05/2011 17:15

I dont think you have too. He should drive to you too see them, could he not stay in a B&B for one night so he can see them for the weekend?

ChocHobNob · 21/05/2011 17:18

Talking nonsense? Yes. Without a court order, you are not legally required to do any travelling. If there was a court order, you may be asked to do half of travelling but on the other hand may just be told to "make the children available for contact" which means he has to organise transport.

Why can he not travel back to where the children are and spend some time with them nearby somewhere? At the same time he should be trying to secure some appropriate accommodation that is suitable for having his children regularly.

Of course, if he is really adamant the children will not see him if you don't do some travelling, maybe you would do some just to ensure the children have a relationship with their father. But that is your decision.

Original poster

jufa · 21/05/2011 17:41

We split up 3 years ago and for the first 2 years it was very hit and miss. However since November of last year when i told him I was going to formailise arrnagements if he didnt stick to promises to them to see them and kept letting them down he has been seeing them weekly.
I would love him to have them overnight or alternate weekends but he maintains he can only afford to rent a room in a house, so cant (and for the same reason cant afford B&Bs).
Now he is saying that he is sick of travelling 60-70 miles and unless i drive half way he wont see them. i see your point CHN about doing what it takes to ensure they have a relationship but this man has had me over a barrel for 3 years with me offering all kinds of concessions just so they get to see them (assistance with fuel costs, having them in my house -see my other post 'ex wont see the children')

OP posts:

zippylou · 21/05/2011 20:31

well he should have thought about travel expense before moving so far away from his children. I certainly would NOT be doing any travelling to take my children to my ex. I would maybe seek advice from a solicitor to be sure but surely u cannot be expected take them half way whenever he feels like it.hope it all works out for you