Hi, I haven't been online for quite some time...laptop went haywire, I've had health concerns etc but I really need to bend your ears.
ExH came up today - it wasn't to see me or the kids especially, he was working in the area and needed to kill an hour. We've been divorced nearly 10 years so no animosity and we normally plod along quite happily.
DD1 was at home this morning as she has an exam this afternoon.
I've had a lot of hassle with DD1 recently, not towards me but involving her...her friend accused her of stealing money which I know she didn't, she's refusing to go to school on non exam days, and last night I had the police at the door accusing her of harrassment against an ex boyfriend. She's no angel, but it was 50/50, he called her awful names and she called him awful names - both at fault.
I've been dealing with a cancer scare (still not over), and it's generally been a horribly stressful few weeks.
I've been going to sw since january and have lost just under 3 stone, and ex was visibly shocked at the difference when I opened the door. It peed him off, and I think that made him spoil for a fight.
ANyway, I asked him to speak to DD1 about the need for her to go to school for the last couple of weeks, as not only would it help her exams but if she didn't I would be accountable and be landed with a fine (I narrowly escaped an £80 last night from the police). He then told both me and her that he agreed with her, and that she shouldn;t have to go to school when other kids (top 50) were granted study leave! That means I now have no authority as she will just refer to her father being on her side. I was really annoyed and showed it.
After having my say I made reference to the fact that DD1 had attracted a lot of attention the day before when we went shopping...she wore á beautiful maxi dress which enhanced her figure and she is quite a busty girl, but the dress was elegant and not revealing. Her father went on a rant about women asking for it when they wear revealing clothes, and that she should cover up, in afct all women should cover up, if we don;t like men drooling. I reminded him that we were talking about our daughter, and he said it didn't matter. So I asked him if he also agrred that girls who wear mini skirts deserve to be raped and he said YES! That 'you women' make it up anyway, and accuse men of rape when it never happens, and we deserve what we get etc etc....I was horrified. And the big shock comes when I explain to you that my exH2 went on trial for multiple rape...one of his survivors was me, and indecent assault (one of his survivors was our 2 year old DD2).
I was so hurt...it was a direct attack on me as he knows what happened to us, and yet he followed me from room to room, shouting that all women screw men over, that women have messed up his life etc. I had to tell him to leave, and he went out almost taking my front door off it's hinges. I came in and cried and cried. I'm a single mum, I have no support and a very traumatic past which has left me on anti depressants. I was doing so well, built our lives up again and now he's left me feeling like a wreck.
Tell me I didn't over react?