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I'm so angry

8 replies

NewPatchesForOld · 18/05/2011 14:46

Hi, I haven't been online for quite some time...laptop went haywire, I've had health concerns etc but I really need to bend your ears.
ExH came up today - it wasn't to see me or the kids especially, he was working in the area and needed to kill an hour. We've been divorced nearly 10 years so no animosity and we normally plod along quite happily.
DD1 was at home this morning as she has an exam this afternoon.
I've had a lot of hassle with DD1 recently, not towards me but involving her...her friend accused her of stealing money which I know she didn't, she's refusing to go to school on non exam days, and last night I had the police at the door accusing her of harrassment against an ex boyfriend. She's no angel, but it was 50/50, he called her awful names and she called him awful names - both at fault.
I've been dealing with a cancer scare (still not over), and it's generally been a horribly stressful few weeks.
I've been going to sw since january and have lost just under 3 stone, and ex was visibly shocked at the difference when I opened the door. It peed him off, and I think that made him spoil for a fight.
ANyway, I asked him to speak to DD1 about the need for her to go to school for the last couple of weeks, as not only would it help her exams but if she didn't I would be accountable and be landed with a fine (I narrowly escaped an £80 last night from the police). He then told both me and her that he agreed with her, and that she shouldn;t have to go to school when other kids (top 50) were granted study leave! That means I now have no authority as she will just refer to her father being on her side. I was really annoyed and showed it.
After having my say I made reference to the fact that DD1 had attracted a lot of attention the day before when we went shopping...she wore á beautiful maxi dress which enhanced her figure and she is quite a busty girl, but the dress was elegant and not revealing. Her father went on a rant about women asking for it when they wear revealing clothes, and that she should cover up, in afct all women should cover up, if we don;t like men drooling. I reminded him that we were talking about our daughter, and he said it didn't matter. So I asked him if he also agrred that girls who wear mini skirts deserve to be raped and he said YES! That 'you women' make it up anyway, and accuse men of rape when it never happens, and we deserve what we get etc etc....I was horrified. And the big shock comes when I explain to you that my exH2 went on trial for multiple rape...one of his survivors was me, and indecent assault (one of his survivors was our 2 year old DD2).
I was so hurt...it was a direct attack on me as he knows what happened to us, and yet he followed me from room to room, shouting that all women screw men over, that women have messed up his life etc. I had to tell him to leave, and he went out almost taking my front door off it's hinges. I came in and cried and cried. I'm a single mum, I have no support and a very traumatic past which has left me on anti depressants. I was doing so well, built our lives up again and now he's left me feeling like a wreck.
Tell me I didn't over react?

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NewPatchesForOld · 18/05/2011 14:49

I should add that he was arrested last weekend for drunken behaviour and aggression, resisted arrest until 4 police officers brought him down. The weekend before that he almost lost the sight in one eye when he threw his hoover out of the bedroom window in temper, and then when he tried to use the broom he snapped it (also in temper) and one half of it flipped up and gashed his eye.

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needanewname · 18/05/2011 14:53

You know you are not being unreasonable here that he is right?

What he did was inexcusable and I would not allow him back in the house until he apologies to you and your daughter.

You also know that you are not to blame for what your exH2 did?

You did not over react at all.

I'm sure that someone else will give some proper advice, I just didn;t want your post to go unanswered.

aubergine70 · 18/05/2011 14:59

You didn't over react, he was obvious trying to hurt you and knows why to dig the knife for maximum pain. If you can afford a solicitor get an order banning him from your house, this is not the kind of person you need around.
Big hug from me, there's not a lot more I can say.

NewPatchesForOld · 18/05/2011 15:08

Hi, and thanks for the replies. I don't need a court order, I will just refuse him access to the house. I live 40 miles from him, and one of the wonderful things about being single is that I can shut my front door and know I don't have to listen to anyone's crap. Not anymore.
Aubergine, I don't know why he'd try and hurt me, that's the thing, apart from the fact that I've lost weight. I bend over backwards to make life pleasant for him and the kids - we always go out as a family on the kids' birthdays, we even went for a picnic about 3 weeks ago (for which I did all the cooking etc). Is he that jealous that I'm finally taking control of my life?
Needanewname...thankyou. I know I wasn't to blame for the abuse from exH2...I carried the guiltfor what he did to DD2 for a long time but in the past year I've deliberately stayed single in order to heal emotionally. However, the reaction he provoked in me today has made me question whether I have healed or whether I need help dealing with it. I thought I was doing so well.

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NewPatchesForOld · 18/05/2011 15:13

The really scary past is that when I called my mum, blubbing on the phone, she said she agreed with him, that if a girl wears provocative clothes then she shouldn't be surprised by what happens! A woman, saying women deserve what they get for wearing a short skirt, or a low top????? She didn't comment on the comments about women crying rape because she won;t acknowledge it happened to me...she doesn't believe in marital rape. Misogynistic men AND women.
As a matter of interest, ExH's girlfriend is 22...he is 43, which maybe accounts for his defence of men ogling young women.

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needanewname · 18/05/2011 16:16

Ignore your mum as well as your ex, they both sound like utter arseholes.

Wearing a short skirt does not make a man rape or assault a woman. Wearing a short skirt is not an invitation for a man to rape a woman. Walking around naked is no excuse for a man if he rapes a woman FFS.

Unfortunately there are some very stupid people out there, luckily you are not one of them, you are a survivor and you will continue to survive for youe sake and that of your children.

He's a knob, don;t listen to him, you keep on going with your SW, not only will you look and feel better but more importanly you will be healthier and a good role model for your children on how to look after yourself.

SimpleSingleDad · 18/05/2011 21:25

What needanewname said.

You may well rub along ok, but this man clearly has a temper (and is an idiot to boot).

Who knows what's happened to your Mum to give her those perspectives, but you know they're seriously outdated.

You did not over-react, and well done you in keeping it together till you got him out of your house.

You are doing well. Attacks from those who know us well go straight to our emotional memories, and so take us back to those emotions and so there's a very strong emotional response.

You are doing well. It probably is jealousy in how you've moved forward (whilst he's still a prick), and that's why he tried to take you back to another time, iyswim.

NewPatchesForOld · 19/05/2011 09:50

Thanks everyone. SingleDad...what you said makes perfect sense. His behaviour yesterday provoked such a sense of panic in me, and it was indeed as if the years were rolling back and I was trapped in the whole abuse/control scenario. Then common sense clicked in and I realised he was only in the house on my say so and I held all the power in the situation so I told him to leave. And he had to.

I actually feel a bit better today about it, because I noticed I had a voicemail message on my phone and listened to it this morning. When he knocked on the door yesterday I couldn't answer straight away as I was busy upstairs and DD1 was in the loo. When I did get to the door he was on the phone. Well, the voicemail was from him when he was waiting to be let in, and it was a filthy foul mouthed rant...'oh fing charming...hello, hello...for fs sake, open the fing door for fs sake'...you get the picture? This was before I even spoke to him. So he arrived in a bad mood and decided to take me down with him. What a prick.

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