Pros / Cons of changing the childrens surnames to mine?

[BadgerBadger]

Today exH signed the letter I typed up regarding deed polls, giving our joint permission to change our DD's names to match my maiden name. (I intend to put the forms for my name change, from married to maiden, through at the same time as theirs.)

Before I go ahead, can anyone give their opinion on the pros and cons of changing their surname from his to match mine?

It's not that I'm having second thoughts as such, just want to make sure that I've considered everything before I go ahead

TIA!

Personally I can't think of wrong with it. My DD's other biological parent and I were never married and when DD was born - she was registered with his surname.

He upped and left when she was 2. As he was violent and abusive it seriously affected DD and she became frightened of him so I immediately changed her surname to my surname at GP, dentist, nursery etc. At the moment she's 'known as' but in May next year I can legally change it on her birth certificate.

The only thing is is it might say formerly known as, on her Passport etc - not too sure...

If your dd is going to live with you she will probably prefer your surname. Only downside is she may feel that part of her link to her dad is going. How about her having both your names?

I can't think of a reason not to either. I remember my cousin getting picking on once because her surname was different was different to her mum's.

How old is your Dd? Is she old enough to have an opinion on whose surname she wants?

It might be a bit of a nuisance having to put on forms (nee xxxxx). That's one of the major reasons I haven't changed my children's names tbh, just because I thought it sounded like a bit of a hassle, like each time you apply for a school, passport, doctor etc., you generally have to put any other names ever known by.

my dd asked to have her name changed to my partners name before we got married because she wanted us all to have the same name so before she started school we changed her known name and now we are married we are changing it legally to our surname,she is happy we will all be a proper family with the same name because before she said she wasnt part of me because she didnt have my name(brain washed in to her by natural dad)she is only 5

Thanks for your advice. As a child I remember wishing I had the same name as my mother when she and my father divorced. For some reason it made me feel seperated from her (and unsure of where I belonged IYSWIM) when she reverted to her maiden name but left my siblings and I with our fathers surname.
I'm cautious of placing my own childhood concerns on the shoulders of my children so your views are much appreciated thanks!

I changed my daughters surname the minute me and my ex split up..... best thing I ever did. I am the one bringing her up 24/7 so she should have my name. Me nad my ex werent married though but she should never have had his name.... cant change birth cert though.... wish I could. Somebody did call her by her old surname the other day and she asked me if that was her name so I had to explain but she just accepted it nad went off and played.... dd is only 3 so never really knew her surname before it changed.

It will save you from being known as 'Mrs Ex-name' by everyone who deals with your child!

Urgh! Blu, what a thought!

Definitely changing them, now.