So, when the father of your children impregnates someone else ...

[colditz]

is it normal to feel weird about it?

My kids are going to have a sibling that I will barely know, never mind have any part in it's upbringing. I'm utterly weirded out by the whole thing.

It is weird at first, but you will get used to it as I did and I bet in time it won't bother you at all

DD has a sibling I know nothing about, I don't know when he/she was born, or the sex of the child.
I found out from the CSA, when I got a letter saying he had to pay less due to 'multiple case allowance'.
The mother of that child has had to go to the CSA too.

If anything it makes me want to run him over with a bus more :)

Oh and his paying less?
Hah.
In almost 10 years he's voluntarily paid £162.

And through the CSA he's paid around £500, but not since Nov 2009.

Sorry, I keep adding to what I want to say.

Let's just say he's a twat shall we?

Mine will meet this baby, will have to share a room with it as it grows older. They will have a whole sibling that I have no experience of. I'm deeply freaked out.

colditz, I went through this a couple of months ago (finding out pregnancy etc, she miscarried so didnt get to the baby stage)

I was weirded out by it - someone related to my children by blood that I would probably not have anything to do with. They too would be sharing a room etc if and when baby does appear, and I find it really strange to get my head around sometimes.

Not least because they have only been together 9 months, but thats another rant for another day.

How are you telling your kids? How old are they? How long has your ex and his partner been together?

I have no experience from your side - I am wife #2 and have 2 DCs with my DH. He's got 3 older DCs with exW.

I'm not really sure how she found it at first. They'd been divorced a good few years before we met so there was no element of cheating etc, and there's a 9yr gap between their youngest and our eldest.

The worst part was, when we told them we were pregnant the first time, his DD went running up to exW after and blurted it out "mummy mummy FEAS is having a baby!!!" oooops

Sorry. Waffling now. It's great anyway... I think she sees the positives. She is lovely to our DCs, helps hers to choose their presents at Xmas etc.

No matter what you feel about it, hopefully your DC will have a whole new person to adore, who will look up to them. It sucks that it's not in ideal circumstances but it is a good thing for your DC.

I admit I found it hard at first that my first child wasn't DH's first too. That he'd done it all before. But actually it is amazing for them as well as our little ones. It's enhanced their lives and I am very grateful that exW, no matter what she thinks of me, can see that.

my dcs have twin half siblings - it did feel a bit weird but I do all I can to encourage them in their relationship with them - they are very cute and the boy is the image of exh's df which did weird me out.

I can see the benefits all round of tphe four of them having a close relationship especially when they're adults (exh h is old, Im quite old as is his p).

I haven't got much time for her (his p - we don't speak) btw but that isn't relevant.