Not married, splitting up..advice needed, please

[onmyown]

Im a regular but have changed my name for this because my DP (soon to be ex) knows my usual nickname and I don't want him to see this.

We have a year old son, we are't married and we're going to split up. This is at my instigation. He's gone into work, which is what he usually does when he wants to avoid facing up to something.

He's told me he wants custody and move away back to his family. I don't know what my rights are but I don't want him to take our son away.

If anyone has any advice, please, please help. Thank you.

Do you mean sole custody? He would have to prove you were an unfit mother for that to be the case, something that is very very hard to do!

To be honest he is the one with very few rights, you are the mother. Whether that is right or wrong is another issue but it is a fact.

Hopefully you will be able to share custody.

I would go to the Citizens Advice Bureau and get a solicitor!

I've been where you are now so don't think you are by yourself on this.

Is his name on the birth certificate? If it is I think I'm right in saying that you both have parental responsibility, if it isn't then only you have parental responsibility. (the law on this changed sometime in 2003 I think)

I agree with weesadie in that if he wants sole custody it will be very hard for him and the only reason the court usually allow this is when the mother is unfit.

Have you any friends who can recommend a solicitor dealing with family issues as I found that recommendations were the best way to find a good solicitor.

He would find it very hard to take your son away from you so please try to relax a bit, as soon as you can talk to a solicitor even if you don't want them to do anything at the moment as it will put your mind at ease.

Like I said I've been through this so I'll keep checking this thread to see if I can help, but if you want to chat CAT me

((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))

Thanks everyone - can't tell you how much I appreciate this - I also posted it in the Relationships folder cos I think it belongs in both.

Not sure how to do a link but it has the same title.

Thanks again