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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Original poster

Now I'm really worried!

10 replies

Montessorisam · 12/03/2011 19:30

I wrote two days ago about how as a lone mother I would cope with 3 kids and a job. Well, then we had decided to split up. He is going tonight. Now I am panicking about how I am going to get to work early. Where am I going to put the kids? Nobody will want my kids at 7am! That is a huge thing.

And that is the only thing I am worried about.

Although, it broke my heart to see my 22 month old kiss his dad goodnight tonight.

The rest of it - the actual working and raising 3 kids bit - I do pretty much alone as it is.

Any advice out there? All will be much appreciated.

OP posts:

GypsyMoth · 12/03/2011 19:56

where is he going? who has them at present?

Mamaz0n · 12/03/2011 19:59

Do you need to leave the house at 7am?

Original poster

Montessorisam · 12/03/2011 20:09

I don't know where he is going. He has a shop and I am guessing that he will be sleeping there tonight.

I will have all 3 kids. He is leaving tonight when the kids have gone to bed and we have arranged that he take them out tomorrow afternoon.

Yes, I have to leave the house at 7am on two days a week and the other two days I leave at 8am. I might be able to re-arrange working hours - again! I only re-arranged last week due to husband not wanting to do Friday school pick ups.

I really want to keep my job and will do whatever I can to do so! Luckily I work in a nursery and have been incredibly good about my changing the hours around a lot!

But I am feeling panicked and a part of me doesn't want to be this brave. A part of me just wants to quit!

OP posts:

Fab123 · 12/03/2011 20:45

You're being very strong, keep it up! It's going to be hard initially to sort all of the hours around the kids but once you have it sussed you'll be fine. I used to go to a place called Latch Key while my mum finished work - they would come and collect me after school in the minibus and we'd have a light tea and watch videos/play on bikes/paint etc until we were collected. Anything like that in your area? Could a friend or neighbour help out tomorrow morning or would work understand if you were a bit late if you explained?
At least you have one less kid to worry about from the sounds of it x

Original poster

Montessorisam · 12/03/2011 20:51

You are So right about the one less kid - he is like a stroppy teenager!

The after school care is fine luckily.

Just have to sort out the mornings.

Thanks for your moral supportX

OP posts:

happybubblebrain · 12/03/2011 21:35

Initially it is just a question of finding the childcare you need and a routine, but once you have this and your finances in place things will get easier. I wish you all the best.

cestlavielife · 12/03/2011 23:41

depends where you are there might be student who might take teh early morning shift or a local childminder.

or if you have room get an au pair live in

gillybean2 · 13/03/2011 10:18

Where do the 3dc go while you work? Presumably the 22month old is at nursery with you?
You say after school care is not an issue. So are the older 2dc both at school?
Do they have an after school club they go too, or a childminder? Can you not find out if the after school provision is able to do mornings too?

Explain to your work the situation. They do have to try and help you while you sort out the child care situation.
And yes there are childminders who may take your dc from 7am and drop them at school. If this is what you need you should get in touch with your local council for a list of CM's as soon as possible and start calling them. As a lone parent you may get help with the cost of childcare and if you work 16+ hours a week it may affect your WTC & CTC so be sure to get that sorted out quickly too.

It will be fine once you have the childcare situation sorted out. Try not to worry too much for now. If the worst comes to the worst hopefully your work will change your hours to suit what childcare you can arrange.

mmsmum · 14/03/2011 13:49

Hi, I know of two childminders who take kids early. One looks after kids whose parents work at a hospital and start at 7am so she works from 6.30am (she does charge an absolute arm and a leg though) and another who I've seen take kids as early as 6.45am and drops them at school (and goes back to her bed lol) I think the challenge is finding someone with spaces but good luck

OhWesternWind · 15/03/2011 13:41

Hi - I am in a similar situation with early morning care as I have to be in work early. I currently have a cm who will take the children from 7.15 (usually 7.10 when we turn up but she is okay with it) and I'm looking at moving to a different one who will take them starting from 7 am. This is in a large village so there isn't a lot of choice - don't know whereabouts you live but I am sure if you ring around you will find somewhere that can help. It's all do-able but a bit daunting whilst you sort out the arrangements and whilst it is all new.

Good luck with it all and I hope things work out for you and the children.

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