Does anyone ever feel like they'd like to rub themselves out and start all over again?!

[msshapelybottom]

I am probably wallowing tonight but my dd (6 yo) has been sobbing her heart out for the past hour because 2 older girls told her that they can hear me shouting through the front door and it's because I'm angry and I wish I didn't have kids....Obviously I've been trying to explain that grown ups sometimes just get tired and don't handle things too well, but I just feel like such an abject failure!

I feel so damn embarrassed and ashamed to think that other people can hear me losing my head at my kids and that they have to comment on it.

I live in a small village, everyone knows everything. Up till now, I've felt like I was doing ok, managing to keep things together with my 3 kids, finally feeling like I could hold my head up high but I've just been so tired and overwhelmed for the past few months - I've been shouting a lot in the evenings when the kids are bouncing off the walls and I'm fit to drop. (I'm not proud of it, wish I could find a better way to deal with the kids)

I can't help thinking that people must be talking about what a crap mum I am....

Does anyone else ever feel that because they are a lone parent they have to try extra hard to prove that they are "good enough"? I sometimes feel as though I am being judged, I'm sure it's all imagined but still, I feel like shit this evening...

Tomorrow's a new day right?

yes,yes,yes!!

but i also have a steady stream of police cars outside!!

5dc.....3 are teens,one going off the rails!

oh god, I hadn't thought about the teenage years yet....glad it's not just me though

I think you're absolutely spot-on about having to try extra hard and being judged. People do judge us harshly

• I don't think you are imagining it!

You know what though,we are all doing (in my opinion) the hardest job in the world, we're doing it on our own and very often in very hard circumstances. You're not a failure, you're a bleeding hero - remember that!

As for the shouting,lots (most?) of us do it when we've reached the end of our tether. Someone once told me not to worry about it because some of the worst damage done to children is done without making a sound.

yes, I do, mainly when I am tired (so most of the time)
Somehow I manage to get myself back up again and - chip up - I put my proud mum hat back on!

Tell your daughter - next time some friend make such comments - to tell them politely that is not very nice to ''spy'' around people s garden

thank you! I was so needing to hear that it's not just me, tiredness is a total bugger isn't it? I think it can feel worse to not have another adult to talk to about it when you have a shitty day, you know?

I have to take the eldest two to school in the morning so by then I'll have put my proud mum hat back on (love that!!) and I'll pick myself back up again....

I get fed up of going to bed and promising myself I'll do better tomorrow, always wondering if today was good enough!

There's not much chocolate left now

you need exercise, not chocolate! Can you start going out on long walks, join a gym, start swimming...? It's the best stress-relief in the world. I'm a shouty Mum every day I don't exercise, but calm and reasonable on the days I do.

hehe thanks Beautiful, I actually DO try to exercise most days, I still sometimes shout!! I feel much calmer when I get out for a walk, I can get time to do this every other weekend, it's the bits in between I need help with!

The chocolate still stands

Start asking people if they've seen that programme on telly in the evenings, you know, the one with the mum that always shouts

I try to shout at DD when I think it might get through to her but she reacts like I'm satan and how dare I shout at her! It is funny and I like how she stands up for herself but if she just listened in the first place lol