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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Original poster

will i always be alone?

9 replies

RoseAnn · 18/02/2011 20:20

i was 16 when i had my little girl after years of hoping her dad would eventualy grow up and step up to his farthering role .... i left him realising this will NVER happen and its best for me and her.

im now finishing an access to nursing corse and have a conditional place at university next yr to get my nursing degree. im bk at my mums house wich is nice to have her suport..... planing to rent place near my mum when i start uni in oct ... mainly as il need her help whne im doing placements.....

i love my little girl more then anything and im realy loving just being a mum and study right nw

however i was with ex since i was 15 ... nw 19 and recently i just started worrying that by time im 35 my daughter gna be 18-19 posible goin of to uni her self starting her own life and il be sooooooo proud of her .... but im worried that when that happens im just gna spend rest of my life alone

im i just being stupied

i dont no if this sounds selfish??

im not sayin i have to have man now (would be nice but im ok without 1 ) just dont wnt to think im gna spend rest of my life without another serius relationship ...

OP posts:

corlan · 18/02/2011 20:38

Roseann - None of us know what the future holds
but it's pretty damn unlikely that you're going to spend the rest of your life alone! Why are you worrying about this at the age of 19?

(By the way - it's brilliant that you're planning to get your nursing degree - you deserve respect for that)

Original poster

RoseAnn · 18/02/2011 20:50

regareds to the nursing thanks - its somthink i want to do so badly even though it might take a lot of hardwork im gna teach my daughter then want some think you go for it no matter how hard it is .... as well as this il have a cgood job and cn give her the best i cn give....

why do i worry - i guess im a worrier and over think things i like to have things pland out ... things i have to get done in the day ... ideas of new things i could do wiv daughter .............deadlines .. ect

i guess it scares me not knowing whats gona happen next ...
but i guess thats life.

OP posts:

BringOnTheGoat · 18/02/2011 22:13

You don't sound selfish - you sound like you are putting your child first and striving to do what is right.

The future is unkown and that is scary. The idea of doing it all alone forever is also daunting. That won't happen but noone can teall you when it will change.

At 19 - you are young and have a whole life ahead of you - it will be filled with new people and experiences - embrace and enjoy them. You sound lovely

lilacisinlove · 19/02/2011 10:46

I met the love of my life at 42, don't worry!

mmsmum · 19/02/2011 23:31

You remind me of me, except I was a little older. I agree with corlan, it is brilliant you are going to do your degree and follow your dreams, and great you have the support of your Mum too!

I was 19 when I had dd and went to uni when I was 23, I'm now in my early 30's and still single. I'm probably still single because I just don't go out anywhere. I wish I could tell you a happier story but don't stress about it. You'll be working with gorgeous young doctors soon ;)

TheAtterySquash · 19/02/2011 23:41

I know this wont help right now, but you're still so young. I met my ex when I was 19, married at 22, now single at 36 - and I don't feel old. I was practically a child when I got married, and now kick myself for missing out on so much by settling down so soon. I'm only now working out what I want from life, as opposed to what I settled for.

You sound very sorted. Figure out what you want from your life, on your terms, then go and get it. It may be very different to what you currently think. Please don't waste time worrying about where your next relationship is coming from - you have a career to focus on. And you should be very proud of yourself.

pickgo · 20/02/2011 00:21

Don't worry, most decent men aren't put off by DCs - if you are right together then that will get you through.

I'd just say, from experience, take your time before letting them meet your DD. Then it won't be complicated if you decide you want to ditch them by having to consider how your DD feels too.

And well done wrt nursing. I expect it will be hard at times but keep at and don't give up. Once qualified you can have a great career and will never be without the means to support yourself and DD independently come what may.

Amieesmum · 20/02/2011 01:26

OP, most men aren't put off by dc's although when they're younger they can be.
I was also a teenage parent & went back to college/uni. Well done to you for doing it sounds like you have your dc's best interests firmly in your mind. Keep it up & try not to worry about being single for now. You'll meet some one in good time.

Enjoy being young, as us teen mums grow old before our time, you'll meet some one don't you worry x

northernrock · 23/02/2011 20:27

Concentrate on your OWN life, and bringing up your daughter, get your career sorted and all good things will come to you.
The worst place to be is dependant on a man who is not worthy of it.
The best way to meet a great man is to be really sure of who you are, and where you want to be.
Weirdly, I remember feeling really old at twenty (!) but now feel really immature young and silly!

You are doing an amazing thing. Dont worry. And the answer to your question is NO!

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