In need of moral support

[Anngeree]

I'm a lone parent. Ds has been poorly for 3.5mths off school for last 11wks with sickness every day (I have posted on health thread before) associated with dizziness and headaches also has spontanious bouts of diarrhoea:( Some days are better than others today were having a bad day he's pale, hot to touch although doesn't have raised temperature, headaches, loss of appetite generally unwell really but other days he's symptom free until after he goes to bed at night when the sickness starts:(
Initially there seemed to be some kind of pattern to sickness he would feel nauseous all day & I could almost guarentee within 10mins of him going to bed he'd start being sick on and off for 2hrs approx 10-20x. Now though there is no pattern don't know whether it's going to be good or bad day prior to it happening.He's sick btw 1-10x a day so sickness has subsided a little. He has been seen by a consultant paediatrician several times since 09/12/10 had various tests but all have came back clear at the moment he's been checked for possible vertigo or labrinthitis (inflammation of inner ear) to rule out that as a cause but so far initial tests haven't picked up any cause for concern either. Been told the consultant will consult with a neuro surgeon and possibly admit him to hospital. Although hospital are doing everything they can i'm very anxious at how long ds has been poorly and i'm even starting to wonder whether they believe he's got all the symptoms i'm describing I just want my little boy better.
Consultant has been in touch with LEA to confirm illness so they're aware i'm not keeping him off school without genuine reason so suppose i'm grateful for that.

A separate issue though is because ds is 7 i'm due to be moved from Income Support to Job seekers even though I'm a student studying 18hrs and do voluntary work when ds is well but obviously at present moment I wouldn't be able to start work immediately as ds is my priority anyone any idea what will happen in this situation?

And if all that wasn't enough was told earlier this week my Grandad is very poorly in hospital and they don't think he has long to live:(

Hi Anngeree, sounds like your really going through the mill, your poor Lil man, Sounds like a hospital stay would be good idea so they can see his symptoms, or even video record them one night so they can see for themselves, is he stressed? your be amazed what childrens stress can show up in symptoms I know my niece has a whole range of issues for years and thats what it came down to.

I'm sorry to hear about your Grandad such a hard time for everyone in the family.

Keep your head held high and always ask for help people will always be happy too

Gosh sorry to hear that your little one is so unwell. It can be frustrating when trying to find out what is wrong. I guess you have looked at his diet and it isnt allergy? You just have to stick with the doctors and cosultants until they get to the bottom of it. I feel so sorry for him poor little lad. Sorry can't help you much just wanted to show some support for you. x

Thank-you the support is appreciated. Don't think it's stress related Billsey the consultant asked whether he was having any problems at school but there has been no cause for concern. The teacher he has was his teacher in nursery the children in his class have gone all the way through school with him so not concerned with bullying or problems with teacher. He has lots of friends and when he was well enough he would run into school sometimes without giving me a second glance. I've wracked my brain to see if there's something at home which could have upset him again can't think of anything. I've talked to him asked if he has any worries told him I wouldn't be sad or angry if there was something he wanted to share but he says there's nothing.

Again don't think there are any allergies happygolucky0 as diet hasn't changed dramatically in the last 5yrs so if it was that think something would have shown up before now but it's not something the doctor has openly considered.

Have you had a meeting at JC about your extenuating circumstances?

I've got a meeting on 7th of Feb but that is supposed to be the one to transfer me to J.S

Have you had your boiler checked?

Yes, it occurred to me that ds symptoms started getting worse a week after my housing association fitted a new boiler so had that checked last wk and they fitted a carbon monoxide alarm which hasn't detected anything. The pressure keeps dropping though so they seem to think theres a leak in one of the pipes somewhere but can't detect where(water rather than gas leak)

Oh god sounds grim, I haven't got any words of wisdom Im afraid but am offering virtual moral support! Hope they discover what is wrong with him soon. Stay strong - someone once said to me (when I was going through some very stressful times) that you are never given more in life than you can handle. I like to hope that that is true

Sorry to hear of your DS AnnGR.
Have they tested for an immune deficiency - sounds very like my DS's symptoms - headaches, sick, runs, generally just not well. Once he got ill it turned into a vicious cycle and he just went further downhill. Once he was sick many times a day for a fortnight. A chemist recommended an antacid medicine which helped a lot. Other thing I thought of for a while was gluten intolerance (because of frequent diarrhea). But that was ruled out eventually after a biopsy.
Some ideas, but I know how worrying it is waiting for a diagnosis. Hospital stay might speed things up. Good luck with JC - could you ring and explain situation?

girliefriend i'll remember that quote thanks :)
I'm not sure whether he's bn tested for immune deficiency but he does seem to be getting a mixed bunch of symptoms all together. It started off as recurrant sickness every few days just like a virus then after 2.5wks started getting sickness every day we've had 6 days without any sickness in 11wks but none have bn consecutive and he has still displayed other symptoms. About 3wks after symptoms developed he had 3 bouts of diarrhoea but didn't have another bout until a couple of days ago. He's had problems with dizziness which is still ongoing, headaches which they've given him Migraine medication for (not that it always works) sometimes have to give calpol aswell. He's complained of stomach pain but it isn't specific to any particular ailment and over the last four days he's developed a cold and is coughing sneezing and has a slight fever (he's 38.5oc but feels cold) He's had an antacid medication but after 5 days there wasn't any improvement and he really didn't like the taste so stopped giving him it wondering though if I was a bit premature stopping medication?! He's had four different medications now all having little affect nothing is showing on tests it seems like a very nasty virus that he just can't shift:(
He's normally so healthy we haven't had anything like this before in the last 7yrs so that makes it even harder to understand and it's so frustrating not knowing what is wrong. As a parent you feel so useless when your children are ill:(

For got to say I spoke to someone at J.C apparently there is something they can do if a child has a long term illness but she wasn't specific

I was also told I shouldn't have bn moved to J.S because i'm studying more than 16hrs

I still have to attend meeting on the 7th but wondering does anybody know what they are doing in that place

Hi Ann
sorry to hear your LO is still poorly
just some thought
Can I ask what is his diet normally and since he has been sick?
Was he BF or had bottle?
Does he know about his grand dad been very ill?
I wonder what type of medication are they giving him if they do not know what it may be.... I guess the go about it in a tentative way
Have you got RL support of any kind?

I'm lucky to have my Mam who lives nearby so getting lots of supoort from her:)and other family friends are just a phone call or txt away.

He's had 2 medications to stop sickness one given by GP which could be used to prevent travel sickness and one from consultant whch was also to prevent dizziness associated with vertigo/labrithitis also had antiacid medication and is currently taking medicine for migraine it's all trial and error.

He knows about his Great Grandad being ill but things have just got worse recently and I wouldn't say they are particularly close.

I breast fed for first 6wks then had to change to bottle feeding as he was just too hungry and wanted feeding every 2hrs.

He has always bn a picky eater he doesn't like milk will not have it on cereal(eats it dry) I have to try and get calcium into him via youghuts, cheese or foods with added calcium. He doesn't like vegetables only one he'll eat occassionally is raw carrot and beetroot but he does eat fruit; grapes, strawberries and apples he has tried other fruits and vegetables but usually tries once then refuses to try again. He used to eat beans but was sick once when he was about 3 and now won't eat them. Because I know the things he likes I know what to give him and I send him to school dinners when he's at school which has encouraged him to try new foods eg fish but he won't have it at home (my fish apparently isn't as good as schools) I've encouraged him to help me cook over the years which is something he enjoys but refuses to try anything he's made. If I make spaghetti bolognese I have to put sauce separate to the pasta and the garlic bread and cheese not that he'll eat the sauce. His diet is mainly carbs, protein, fibre, sugar and fats.

Typical diet: Breakfast 2 slices of medium white bread-School Dinner- Tea: Buffet plate (choice of tomato sauce sandwich/ Satay sticks/ cocktail sausages, crisps quavers/hula hoops/ pringles,fruit, yoghurt)then supper: Fruit with sweetner/ bread or dry cereal

He also likes to eat Birdeye chicken, lincolnshire sausage,pork sausage,Pork chop and he'll have these served with a mixture of mashed potatoes/oven chips/ rice/pasta or egg noodles

He usually eats roughly every four hours but has bn off his food until around dinner time with this illness then eats dinner and tea and supper. His diet hasn't really changed and I know it's not perfect but i'm finding migraine medication has bn making him extra hungry so eats and eats from 8pm sometimes hungry at 12am but that is because of medication normally supper time is no later than 8.30pm

feel a bit stupid to ask this but he has been tested for coeliac disease?

Yes I think so :)

We're back to hospital on Thu so will have to see what that brings....

so......went to the hospital today even though ds was clearly poorly today he didn't get admitted as sickness is starting to subside a little. We've had 2 days with no sickness although not consecutive and this past week has only bn sick a maximum of 3x a day.But he has had raised temperature, sore throat, coughs, sneezes, ear pain & spontanious bouts of diarrhoea. He is being refered to another hospital as a medical reason for sickness hasn't bn ruled out but it was suggested again that it could be stress but as i've said in an earlier post really can't think of anything which could have worried him quite so much either at home or at school to make him as poorly as he has been:(
I'm thinking of sending him to school next week even if he is unwell just so they can see for themselves and have to send him home.

What would you do as i'm getting really anxious that they think i'm keeping off unnecessarily

You allow the changeover, then be truthful in any job interviews you attend, that you have a chronically ill child. They will either not employ you (most likely) or they will employ you and allow you to take the time off you need.

Also found out that my Grandad died this morning at 7:45am it wasn't a total suprise because he has been poorly for quite a while.

Why do all these bad things seem to happen all at once:(

I'm sorry about your grandad

sorry about your grandad
When r u taking ds to the other Hospital?
Not sure what to advice but tbh... I refuse to believe stress can be affecting a child to this extent
Your GP must be able to write a certificate that prove you are not making it up surely
Does he want to go back to school? Does he feel up to it?

We haven't bn sent an app out yet!

Feel quite angry because consultant basically infered ds was making up symptoms so I would keep him off said if he asked his own children if they wanted to stay off they would say "yes" but it's simply not the case of asking ds if he wants to stay off it's the case i've had to make a decision to keep him off based on the symptoms displayed. Ds started being sick on 19 Oct and he was still attending school until mid November when sickness became more frequent(every day!)

I refuse to believe stress has made ds this poorly and can not think of any stressful circumstances either at home or school around the time the sickness became more frequent. I was quick to point this out to consultant and he did say a medical reason hadn't been ruled out.

Ds is still being sick almost every day but not more than 5x a day in the last wk.

While I don't think school is the best place to send him if he is ill I think they need to see for themselves what is happening and they'll have to sent him home if he's poorly at school.

I am sure if he is going to be sick 5 times a day they wont keep him there. Send him from monday but do press on for the other hospital