Divorce- can anyone help me advise my desperate friend

[Pixiefish]

received an email from my friend this morning. she wants to divorce her h. she has 2 kids (1 with autism-4, 1x 2yo girl). She was a teacher but is a SAHM now because of the 4yo's autism program where someone comes to the house every morning to work with him. He's in school in the afternoon.

They own a house together- this is the crux of the email that i got off her-

'We've talked at length. He wants to keep solicitors out of it to save the money. I trust him to do everything amicably, but I presume lawyers have to be involved eventually.

Sorry for the bombshell.

PS. I need a job. I plan to buy H out with the house, and get a job so that I can pay the mortgage. (With "maintenance" I guess.)'

NOW- it's over 10 years since I had my divorce and there were no kids involved- She's looking to me for advice and I don't know what to advise her- I am going to tell her to see a solicitor even if its just to rubber stamp the deal that her h works out for her.

Can anyone give me any advice of how I can advise her.. BTW the work issue isn't really a problem as she's a teacher and can get supply work

Hi pixiefish, sorry if this is a bit late!

I am currently getting divorced and also have 2 children, one with special needs. Based on what I have learned from my solicitor, I think your friend should not trust her ex too much with regard to the finances. She needs to ensure that she gets enough out of the deal to afford to house herself and children and also to take into account her reduced future earning potential due to her SN child. She should definitely take legal advice asap and not rely on her husband to be amicable. If their joint assets are not huge, she should be expecting to get a reasonably large share of the joint pot in order to house her family and protect her for the future.

For maintenance, she can apply for spousal maintenance (if she is on her own) as well as child maintenance, although this may bring down the capital split percentage. Hope this makes some sense! Good luck to your friend.