I've done nothing all day (in a bad way)

[TheChamomileLawn]

Just can't seem to get motivated to do anything when ds is at his dad's and I've just wasted the whole day basically. I'm not really enjoying life much at the moment tbh. Been on my own for about 4 months and I want to feel better, but I can't. Anyone else?

Usually when I have some time without ds (not often) the unmotivated part is, I suspect, the brain and body demanding a rest, all my well laid plans go awry.

Do use even a small amount of that time to see friends and get some fresh air - I find this helps to feel more positive.

Good luck.

Thanks homemade, Not even got the motivation to go out at the moment though! I need a big kick up the arse I think

There's even some of ds's wee that leaked out of his nappy onto my bed this morning, and I'm just leaving it and sleeping on the other side

I'd kick you CL but it would be an own goal as I've been rubbish this half term. Started off with lots of plans then went down with cold and sinuses from hell, been crawling around the house feeling lethargic and hateful. Saw a friend today however and still feeling physically rough but mentally a lot brighter. And yes, we walked in the woods, so homemade is spot on!
You have family nearby don't you - can you drop in tomorrow for tea and chat etc?
fwiw I found the first contact visits v hard, and the house v empty so I'd try and plan something to be out and about when they happened, even if having a swim and a coffee.
Try not to be too hard on yourself. Our 'me' time is rare, certainly, but if you put too mmuch pressure on yourself to enjoy it and be productive you end up doing the reverse. Relax. Start again tomorrow?

I could confess to worse than the wee story lol
how much wee is that anyway, a spoonful? you are judging yourself, no need

Thanks ninah, yes I've got family nearby, I see them often. I'm just not enjoying anything much at the moment. I start again every day then it all goes downhill. Gonna get a good night's sleep then hopefully things will look better. Thanks all.

Maybe a ladlefull

i know! I seem to be following you round mn atm, tell me to piss off if you like
but i feel for you, I do remember how horrid it all was in the beginning, I have lived to tell the tale and it DOES get better! promise

ah, it's only water
one day at a time CL

No don't piss off, please! Thanks for your support I appreciate it, I know it will get better, just wish it would be soon, and before I end up appearing on Life of Grime or something.

When I left my ex i went to stay in what had been my parents' house (they had died over the previous couple of years) and my sisters had keys. I found it impossible to keep on top of housework, just getting dressed and feeding dc was about all I was capable of (still on mat leave fortunately). My sisters used were horrified at the state of the kitchen sometimes and it made me even lower. Even now, the house is often sometimes last priority after dc, work, study etc. I do know how feeling low means it can all go to pot. It's a viscious circle too, as you feel more and more out of control, can't invite people round etc. What i'd suggest is set one really basic target each day. Like hoover. Nothing major. Achieving it will make you feel better. Your family sounds supportive (unlike mine) so don't be too proud to explain you feel it's getting out of hand time to time and need support.

and I love watching life of grime,i come over all smug! oh, at least I don't have parrot poo all over the cornices, how vile
(that's because you don;t have a parrot, ninah. ah)

Hi

Ninah's right, it does get better, different too, and life continues. Her bit about one task a day is good.

I had a spell, when ds was small, of quite a bad depression[hsad], if you're feeling low a lot, go to your gp. Other adult contact is important - even if you don't say anything!![hgrin] As you said, tomorrow is a new day.

Hi CL - just wanted to say you are not alone in doing nothing...

The last time my DC were gone for a few hours I planned to go shopping and see a movie which is a huge rare treat for me. Instead, I threw on some jeans and a jacket over my pjs, went and brought the paper and some junk and sat on the couch for hours! I would have stayed in bed but I'd already stripped it for washing when I got up :)

My house has periods when I panic if someone rings the bell and wants to come in - I found flylady.net and although it's a bit extreme and I don't follow it religiously, if I'm in the mood it can really help.

Don't be so hard on yourself - I've done the wee thing too!

This is my motto at the moment: 'No one can go back and start a new beginning but anyone can start today and make a new ending'

CL, how are you doing today?

I have a childless day too, and it's half term so I'm not at work. Right now I'm in my dressing gown and I didn't get up til nine. I am going to get off my a*se now though and do some exercise.

Loved your life of grime comment - hope it doesn't come to that!

Hi thanks everyone, I'm not on my own then! Feeling better today, I had a dr's appointment today anyway about compulsive eating think I mentioned it on another thread, so she's referred me to mental health team (I have been referred before but was too scared to go to the appointment)
Still not done any housework apart from the dishwasher. Thank god I don't have a parrot is all I can say!