think ex's mum is paying maintainance??

[ohsleepyone]

right not sure how to start with this, my ex freaked out from the 20 week scan onwards and have spoken to him less than 10 times since (ds is now 1!) i speak to his mum every few weeks(ish) and she has now said he's been telling her all this stuff how he thinks bout ds and bla bla bla, she rang last week and said he wants to start paying something but will give it to her for her to pass on, (she lives 2 hours away and he is in the army and in scotland last i heard) the more i think about it the more i think she's saying this stuff to make her son seem better and the money is coming from her..bottom line is, should i still take it??

my heart says i shouldnt, but i'm struggling big style so why shouldt i? its the moral dilema thing so any opinions welcome!!

xx
:)

why isn't he paying maint already - CSA?

If he's in the army you can contact the forces and they will do an attachment of earnings. they do not (AFAIK) look kindly on maintenance cheats.

Tell her you'd rather it was done directly without her having to be involved and you'll contact the CSA to get them to set up the payment which means that none of you have to contact each other.
As he's now willing to pay he won't mind giving them the details now will he...
You can probably judge by her reaction as to that whether it's genuinely your ex that is going to be paying. He won't take kindly to CSA if he hasn't offered.

And yes she may very well have something to do with it; either making him see the light or paying it herself.
Either way the money is for your ds and if you don't need to spend it then certainly put it in savings for him.

Going via the CSA will ensure it's him that pays.

Take it and run. Sod the CSA unless the payments stop.

just take it. it's for your son.

if it comes from her so what? she is his grandparent.

Good advice from the others - he should be paying; and you should not be struggling.

However if Granny does want to get involved in your childs life then thats no bad thing imo