Question for the fit and interesting ladies please.

[JaquiChan]

Been emailing/texting a guy for a while now. We met last week, he is lush . He emailed me when he got home to say he had a great time etc. Text the next day with the same sort of thing.

I am very new to dating but have lurked on your threads and various others. He has been texting today and has said that "he can't wait to see me again, that's for sure" but hasn't suggested any dates. His texts have had a smattering of sweetie/darling aswell. So my question to the wise and wonderful women of the dating world - is this man is nobber? .

TIA, will check back later.

Aww Boo, that's really great. I know what you mean about the being on PoF, I'm on there too, but blimey, how's a single mum actually going to meet someone otherwise. I can really relate to the confidence boost as well, I have bought clothes that I would never normally wear, nothing raunchy, skirts, dresses, I was a fully paid up member of the jeans brigade. I feel pretty good.

My guy is from online too, he has text back that he can do Friday as well if I can't make Thursday .

Keep us posted how it progresses.

I had fun on pof

Well done on finally sorting a day!

thank you lou, realise now I have nothing to lose by taking the bull by the horns so to speak , roll on Thursday!!

My date is Thursday too I'm offsetting the second date nerves by meeting another chap for coffee on Friday. God it feels wrong though. My name is Boo, and I'm an internet dating slut.

Boo, I tell my friends I'm out whoring on the internet . Oh, I think it's a fab idea to have a back up plan, like you said chickens and baskets.

I'm meeting mine for a drink on Thursday, what are your plans?

Well, our first date last week was at a lovely little bar and we shared a bottle of red and talked for nearly 4 hours.
This week, we're going to try and start at one bar and maybe have a drink at one or two others. I am tryign to be cool about it all, but I am so excited. But what to wear???

woah, you have more than one bar where you are?!?!?! I am in the arse end of nowhere so choices are limited. Guy lives over an hour away so will probably meet half way next time.

What did you wear last time? I was in a skirt and boots, so may go down the jeans that make my legs look long and slim route.

I think I might want a coffee friday back up as well .

Hi JC,
OMG i have agonised and agonised over bloody txt messages what do they mean what is he really saying etc lol, txt messaging is a nightmare, as there are no inflections or clues (tone of voice etc) like when u actually speak verbally to someone. My advice and i am fast becoming a pro at this dating lark ... Just be honest, he clearly likes you :).
I generally have a 'let's not bulls* each other conversation pretty early on (1st - 3rd date) that way cards from both sides are on the table - what u want/think u want right now, what u may (if things go well) be looking for in the future etc, I am quite direct however you can do all this subtlely (i was never blessed with that quality unfortunately (confused).
I am single just now but got hot date nxt week, first man i've been excited about in a year or so woo woo.
Good luck JC, be yourself and enjoy.

crumbs, thank you for your post, very insightful. I hope your date goes well. How did you meet?

I wore a top pretty much the same as this, my favourite dark skinny jeans, flip flops and a black blazer.
I am thinking I can get away with the jeans and flip flops again as we were sat down the whole time- he wouldn't really know as long as I changed the top. I only feel comfortable in dresses and skirts with heels, and if we're going ot more than one place I don't want to be tottering around. O how I wish I had money this week, I'd have so much fun going shopping.
The guy I'm having coffee with does seem lovely, but it's not quite as easy to speak with him iyswim. It may be different in the flesh.

Flip flops, dear god you are going to tell me that you are somewhere soooo exotic. Wednesday night we reached a whopping -2 where I am, and that is unusual at this time of year. Like the top alot.

Erm, Devon
I wear flip flops pretty much all year round, so I don't expect others to follow suit I might go a bit more quirky this time, I have some great chino trousers, just don't know what to wear on top. Might show a bit more cleavage this time, was very modest and wore a vest underneath last time.

Boo, you must have been in the very south west of Devon as it was blardy freezing in my part.

what do you mean by quirky?

Not sure. I played it quite safe for the first outfit, but I'm only a youngun, and by some standards not bad looking so maybe something a bit more me. Might go on the hunt for something vintage if I get time.

well let us know how things progress outfit and date wise. I'm not a youngun but decided to move out of my comfort zone (the jeans scenario) and I felt pretty good to the extent that my wardrobe is slowly changing. I have decided to go with the jeans on the next date purely because my pins look really good in them, shallow me, hell no.

Have to go now but keep posting, am loving the anticipation.

boo, how are things going with your guy?

Well, have seen my guy twice now, lots of text/calls in between, he is rather nice . Is there an 'acceptable' time lapse before taking things further .

Jaqui, I had to postphone last night due to a flaky babysitter, but was able to do it early in the week so plenty of notice. Going out tonight instead. I cannot wait, I bought a fabulous dress in the Warehouse sale yesterday, and my nan has given me the money for the babysitter, bless her I am trying to keep level headed and keep my realistic, slightly cynical hat on, but I realllllly like him. I can't wait to see what we do tonight, the plan was to meet in a little pub in town, but being Friday it's going to be busy, and he wants to go somewhere that's not too busy. I take that as a good sign, I had such a good time just talking for hours last time. I am gearing up for a kiss as well
For me, you can go the next step as soon as you feel ready. I think tbh, though I will probably want to, I will wait. I have massive body issues, and tbh won't strip off for just anyone, not so early on. I am wondering how early is too early to invite him to my house though. Assuming a friend can have the children at her house, and if I make it quite clear that sex isn't on the cards, do you tink it's ok before the next date (if there is one) to invite him over to watch a movie? If i have to organise care for the dc I may as well go out anyway I suppose

Boo, glad things are going well with you. This dating lark is so tricky isn't it? I agree it's a good sign he wants to take you somewhere not too busy, just getting to know someone new is loads of fun. Not sure about inviting him to yours so soon, as you say if you have childcare sorted make the most of it and get out.

I really like my guy, we have talked and kissed and I have to admit that I would like to take it further but like you have a few issues that I need to overcome.

What are the wardrobe plans for tonight then?

Have to go to work now but will check in later.

this dress (which looks much better on me, hurrah!) with opaques and black heels. ANd a bloody big coat if it doesn't warm up a bit. Is it too much? It actually looks quite dressed down if I wear a little cardi too, but gives me the opportunity to flash just a bit of boob
Only other options are my good skinny jeans and another top, but I think I will stick witha dress. Much harder to dress for a Friday night as I don't know where we'll end up

Hi Boo, go with the dress, it's lovely. I went with a skirt second time but will go with jeans next time as we are going to meet for coffee. Never has an outfit been thought and re-thought so many times . Report back and good luck with the snog .

Boo, how did it go?

It was alright. Am feeling a bit odd today and after a lengthly discussion with my best friend I'm still not entirely sure why.
We started out at a nice little place I've not been to before, shared a bottle fo red, talked loads and loads then shared a taxi home. I don't think he realised just how close I lived and there was no chance for the elusive kiss, so there was an awkward peck on the cheek and a quick hug. I still really like him, but I'm wondering if more as a friend than anything. We have organised for him to come by next week (I know, I know, but he's going to tinker with my computer and bring a movie) and then to go to the movies later on in the week so the plans are still being made.
It's a funny thing realy. All of my relationships up til this point have been with guys who were already friends. So in a way, going on dates is a new experience for me, and I might actually feel more comfortable persuing something when I already consider hima friend iyswim? But I think that's a bit odd . I'm also feeling conflicted that it all feels so easy. Best friend thinks that's because I've been single, and really through the mill this past year, that I had probably assumed it would be much harder to start a relationship than it actually is, which makes sense. I'm not into drama at all, but all I can think today is that he is just so nice!!! I have no urge to rip his clothes off , more just snuggle up with a nice cuppa. But you know what? All my relationships were with immature, silly little men who didn't deserve me. Maybe this is what it's supposed to feel like? I don't know. So, much thinking going on here today. Hope you're faring better than me!

Boo, I do hope that things work out how you want them to but as you say, plans are still being made so that's a good sign. Shame about the snog though .

Saw mine on Thursday, not so sure about him now, he admitted to having money worries, don't we all, however he started on about how expensive drinks were in the pub (even though I bought a round) then went onto how he is not looking forward to "bloody Christmas", just didn't think it was appropriate being in mind it was only a second date.

There is a book called the Rules. It's a genius book because it's nailed the dating game. Basically that we are still products of evolution ..women over think it (what to wear,right star signs, do I like him) Men like a challenge (sport,gambling,). Tells you how to overcome this disadvantage!

Glad you are all out there though.Much better to have loved and lost then not have loved at all.
Although not the same if you're up at 6am with the kids and a banging hangover.

The Rules is a load of old bollocks and the feminist in me would love to burn it frankly. There is no game. Iirc, this si the book that says if he asks you out for the weekend any later than Wednesday you have to turn it down as you 'have other plans'. Sod that.