christmas as a lone parent. How does it work?

[notanidiotnomore]

This is my first Christmas as a single Mum.
My difficult ex has said he wants to pick them up at midday and take them to the in laws.
(From a purely selfish point of view, this would be awful as it means I will spend the rest of the day on my own as I have no family here).

What do most people do in terms of sharing the kids at Christmas?

This will be my first christmas as a single parent and I'm dreading it! Ex is so indecisive, I've told him he can have ds christmas day as he has lots of family around and I don't, I'd much rather ds spend the day with his gps, aunts uncles and cousins than just me. Now I think he wants him boxing day too, I've never been apart from him for more than a few hours at a time and I'm going to miss him so much but I know he'll have a great time and thats the main thing. I just can't wait for 27th dec when its all over!

My ex has never had DS on Xmas day - his choice and it has made it easier for me but he nearly always has him on Boxing Day and for as long after as he wants.

My new DP has the following arrangement;

Year 1 - DC come to him at 4pm on Xmas eve and stay until 10am on Xmas morning, then get picked up again at 10am on Boxing day.

Year 2 - it swaps round to the opposite.

I personally think this system is very unfair on the children as they are not allowed to take any toys from one house to the other. Meaning that they open presents on Xmas morning, then have to get changed and go to another house.

DP seems to think it's fair as both parents get to see their children on Xmas Day.

I would suggest that they come at 4pm on Xmas eve and stay until 10am on Boxing day. They can then have another "Xmas day" on Boxing day and as this would alternate each year, be fair on each parent.