Having a bit of a wobble

[crace]

I've felt very in control up until now, when H isn't home I feel sad of what's lost and when he is I feel irritated. I am sure splitting up is right but I am so SAD that the 10 years we had is over, so much history. We have two children and I gutted for them to have parents who are split up and even thinking to their weddings (which is ridiculous) but I never ever wanted them to have divorced parents.

I am just devastated over the whole thing. It's early days and I know it will get easier, I used to love my evenings on my own so I am not sure what's changed now :(

hey Crace, all I can say is, know exactly what you are going through (as do so many wiser than me on here) - your summary describes my situation precisely, but it has been the best part of a year and I am pretty ok these days, so hang on to the certain knowledge that it gets better
grieving for the future you thought you would have is very natural. The good news is you have a great future, just different

what ages are your DCs?

I have a 14 year old from another relationship, and two from this marriage DD 4.5 yrs and 2.25 DS.

Just so so gutted. Feel like a failure to them

when did he leave/it break down?

You are not a failure, this shit happens

sorry, wandered off to see if I could find an old thread I was on some months back in relationships - All new road to recovery for the recently ditched - is full of great advice and people going through the same thing - but it is very long, think they are on thread 5 or 6 by now

It's only been two weeks since the first serious "talk" but he's basically been a wuss about the whole thing. Forced me to be the bad guy and end things. Meanwhile playing happy families.. I really don't think he's thought this through but by the time he's worked out that the kids will only see him part time and that there is no little woman at home ironing and cooking doing the laundry. He thinks he has it so hard? Not yet he doesn't.

And if he does wake up then it's too late for me anyway - no one is allowed to muck people around that long.

I just am so bloody sad for the kids. This is not what I wanted for them. I am ok with being a single mum, have done it before and H works so much that I am already albeit financially covered.

I can do this. I'd just rather not. :(

crace - know what you mean, it's the whole'this is not what I signed up for' thing isn't it

no words of wisdom here other than it does get better.....