A couple of years ago I met a wonderful man, we have had a fantastic time, we have some very strong interests in common, we are great together but we are also very different and I'm afraid these things would end up making me bitter against him.
The differences are as follows:
I am very social and love to be surrounded by friends and family.
He is very shy, certainly he would avoid groups of people as much as he could.
We have very different styles of parenting, he is great with DS but he seems to think that a "good boy" is one who says please, thank you, turn the lights off and above all stays still for most of the time. He rewards quietness and stillness, and doesn't like children to take any kind of risks.
I agree about the politeness aspect but I celebrate the curiosity of my son and his willingness to try new things, sometimes I feel that new man's protectiveness is slowing DS up and also his son's.
I feel very strongly about healthy diets (out of medical problems)
He thinks that food is food and most of what he eats either comes from a tin or the supermarket freezer.
I don't know if he is poor or stingy, as he does freelance work and due to the recession, he is not getting much. He seems to think that as long as he gets enough to pay for basic things, things are ok.
I'm not in California, I also lost my job and was unemployed for most of the last year, but I have been trying very hard, and constantly, to find a job and have finally done it. I have plenty of debt but to be honest, I am exhausted of being extremely careful with money and I am doing my best to go back to the standard of living I had before I divorced. I have decided that I am the only one who will take me back there, but... many times I feel as if he is holding me back.
And finally, we live in different cities, neither of us wants to leave its own. No plans on the foreseeable future.
To his credit, he is kind, considerate, loyal and very very caring. He is absolutely lovely, makes me smile all the time, he is sensitive enough to appreciate small details and he seems to... adore me.
But, is reality stronger than dreams?