does the loneliness go away?

[SparklyGothKat]

Me and DH split up about 6 weeks ago, i am much happier alone and the kids are happier, but I get so lonely in the evening. Does it ever go away?

Yes. It's normal, you're used to having the other person around, even if you weren't happy.

Have you got any friends you can invite or go out with sometimes?

Soon you will get used to your new life

sorry to hear that sparkly , hope it gets better soon , thinking of you xxxx

The lonliness is horrible, I went through this and at times it was overwhelming, I would do anything that I could to stay out of the house, but slowly it will get better. If your children are small it can be hard to get out in the evenings, but if you can keep busy and be out and about as much in the daytime, then that makes it a little easier.

I'm four months on now and although it hasn't completly gone away it has got better.

If nothing else then you can always come on MN for a chat, there's always someone about.

It really depends on how much support from family and friends you get and how old your dc are.
I get hardly any sipport and 11 years later the lonliness is still one of the hardest things to deal with. Sometimes it's better than others though :(

I agree with Gillybean that loneliness is one of the hardest things to deal with. But being alone is not the same as being lonely and apart from sites like this, there are a fair few things you can do alone.

I reently went on holiday alone, reguarly go the cinema alone, and if I'm honest really enjoy the peace and quiet and lack of disputes that being a lone parent can bring.

6 weeks is no time, the loneliness is soemthing you'll get used to. It's far better than being in a not-good relationship and even if you feel lonely, don't be daft and rush into something just because.

Someone on here said to me once 'It's better to be alone than in bad company'.

I find this comforting.

If you can't get out of an evening then try inviting friends/family around to share a bottle of wine or watch a film while the children are in bed.

I mumsnet, have joined a dating website, and sometimes just read of an evening. I find this helps with the loneliness.

How old are your children?

I agree Supercherry In the early days, when I was stil with my ds dad, I did used to look at him in the evenings in despair, and think 'is this it for the rest of my life?' quite honestly in the end as awful as it sounds I used to wish that he would meet someone else, so when I came round to leaving, although it was tough and lonely I would much rather be on my own than in a lonely relationship.

My kids are 12, 10, 9 and 2. I am much happier on my own, but the lonliness really hit me last night when I realised I hadn't seen another adult all day.

I dont think the lonliness ever really stops I just think you find different ways of dealing with it at first its hard because your not used to it but its when you get TOO used to it that causes a problem.
I dont always like company sometimes i just lock myself away from the world and thats scary! i please myself and thats it I do stuff on my own i just accepted it I suppose

Another one here.5 months on - since baby dd was born. It is lonely in the evenings,and quite difficult to meet people for a social life as most people are doing family stuff at weekends,with their husbands/partners and children and stay in during the week.

I am determined to try to build as much of a life for myself as I can.I would love to think I might find a partner one day.But I will not compromise ,and my opportunities are limited.

I am not ready yet ,in any case,and can't seem to get the hang of dating!

MN is my social life ,currently...

It is going to be much harder if you are used to someone else being around but really with four children you are not "alone".It's just a perception that someone is missing I think.

You'll get used to being the centre of your family. Use your situation to chat to different mums..think most people like an underdog. You have children at secondary,primary and pre school age so there must be lots of people out there you can meet.

You have loads of options now..get a job/different job,join the PTA's, get involved with school fundraisers etc.

Antalya 1 is right too. Nothing more lonely than being with the wrong person.Please don't feel bad for being lonely either, it's just a phase and it will pass. Just help it along when you are ready.

Am involved with the children centres special needs group :) I actually run it. And am getting involved with the PTA too. I have loads of friends, and get out twice a month when he has the kids overnight, which is great. And most of the time I am fine, just last night it hit me.. I am fine today.