reality kicked in so down

[wornoutbyarguing]

not looking for any sympathy ,well maybe just a bit

been seperated for 3 weeks and was doing so well well pow am a sobbing mess for last 24 hours,must be reality of living alone in a flat with my dds ,hardly any furniture and money ,still waiting for benefits to be sorted,

left ex h 3 weeks ago as i mentioned on other threads his whoring and porn addiction killed our marriage of 10 years

had text rage earlier told him he was a
F&"@::G C&>t which isnt like me and it was all his fault dds age 7 was sobbing for hours last nite after dds had access over nite because she missed him so much.

he kinda said after 5 mins oh well i am going now and pretty sure he was off somewhere

i guess its just post traumatic COMPLETE TWAT DISORDER

sorry just needed to vent

thank you feel better

go back and take some furniture!!

wheres his child support...come on,fight this!

hi tiffany
waiting for a community care grant at mo or crisis loan,hes giving me 30 quid a week at mo for dds so not starving ,my income support should be in 2morrow and family credit will be in on friday.......

sorry just feeling sorry for myself today ,been bouncing around doing the i can cope ok thing and feeling free and then just crashed today

i need to stop thinking about what hes up to now and concentrate on our life,but those first few weeks getting in to the swing of it are a bit difficult

Poor you. Definitely don't think about what he's up to. I am in a spookily similar place to you, the only difference is (I presume) that I've been here before so I'm past crying.
It does get better
You can do it
You will be better off without him

I sound like a self help tape but honest - it's true

thanks all

i cant wait to get that place where you really are past crying,,thought i was but its seems not

Could be I am a hard old cow though . I'm past crying cos I've taken him back and been where we are now too many times. But you are much cleverer than me (cos nobody could be as stupid) and you're powering on through without having him back.

Have a good cry, why not. I have seriously thought about going through all my chipped plates and having a good smash-up. Only my very genteel neighbours are currently holding me back.

thanks tippychoocks

this is the 3rd time weve split up but he always moved out wheas i have done it this time ,so i can make it mine and dds home

no room for him .lol x

seriously thanks for kind words x

Paint it pink and buy more cushions
No worries. we have a lot in common and I know it helps to have supportive people, even in a weird internet way.

What you've got there is what they call 'buyer's remorse'... Typically after making a big purchase decision, people are all excited about taking the plunge. A few days/weeks later the enormity of the cost hits them and reality bites

You've got that about the separation. Expect visions of good times are floating into your head and, despite yourself, you miss them. You may even miss him. That would be normal. This is the time to gird your loins (whatever that means) and write down somewhere all the crap that he made you endure. Read this list daily to remind you what you're getting away from. Make another list of where you'd like to be in a year's time.... maybe it's a holiday or doing something he held you back from doing. Read this daily as well ... it's your 'light at the end of the tunnel'.

Reality on your terms, however dire, is always better than compromising. Good luck

wornoutbyarguing, a big hug and stay brave. Last year this time I finally got rid of controlling ex and was left with 3dc, lots of debt, no money and admittedly , lots of furniture! Its awful but as others said, it truly does get much, much better..I painted walls bright red, wrote down all the things I was going to enjoy in life eventually and as chil1234 said, all the reasons I left the pathetic life I'd led before-think freedom and give yourself time to be sad and heal, good luck!