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Lone parents

Use our Single Parent forum to speak to other parents raising a child alone.

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Original poster

anybody changed a surname with father being involved?

17 replies

MascaraOHara · 23/08/2005 21:01

Is it possible to change a childs surname without the fathers permission? his name is on the birth certificate but we were never married.

HAs anyone got any experience? is this possible?

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bonkerz · 23/08/2005 21:04

I did with my ds. Went to CAB and had to declare i was the only one with parental responsibility. This was in 2000 so obviously not sure when fathers got parental responsibility automatically.

Original poster

MascaraOHara · 23/08/2005 21:05

Title should obviously read 'without father being involved'

OP posts:

cod · 23/08/2005 21:05

Message withdrawn

Nemo1977 · 23/08/2005 21:07

my mum did this for me when i was a child. Although i think she was a bit illegal and faked a letter from him[shock. There must be some way to do it properly

Aimsmum · 23/08/2005 21:07

Message withdrawn

spacecadet · 23/08/2005 21:08

if the father has parental responsibility, then you cant do it without his permission, if he doesnt have parental responsibility, he could apply for it, he you apply for a surname change, and he would most likely be awarded it, then he would need consulting, for you to do the name change, i changed dds surname when i married dh and had to get permission from ex dp.

rickman · 23/08/2005 21:09

Message withdrawn

Micku5 · 23/08/2005 21:16

My sister did this. She and the baby's father were not married and against all advice she put the fathers name on the birth certificate.

After several months she changed her dd's name via deed poll this was because she was not married to the father and had sole parental responsiblity. Had split up with him and he didn't know what he wanted and basically messed my sister and the baby about (threw them out after a few months - wasn't too keen on being a dad, one minute acknowledged the baby next demanding paternity test)

spursmum · 23/08/2005 21:41

I want to change my ds' name as his father has nothing to do with him and I want him to have my family name. He doesn't have parental responsibilty.
Is £18 a good deal for a child's name change of should I be wary?

pesha · 23/08/2005 21:41

I have just changed my dds name cos wanted it done before she started school. If the baby was born recently, i think since april 2004 but i not sure about that, and the father is on the birth certificate they will also have asked you to sign something that gives him parental responsibility in which case you would need his permission, if it was prior to this and you werent married then even if he is on birth certificate he doesnt have pr.
I changed dds name, without notifying her father, on line, was very simple they send you sample letters tell you who to notify how to do it etc and they also explain all about pr, think it cost about £20.

pesha · 23/08/2005 21:54

Just looked it up, I changed dds name with changebydeedpoll.co.uk it cost £20. Was really quick and easy all legally binding got everything i needed, no problems. Would definately recommend them.
I also looked at ukdps.co.uk, they charge about £40 which i thought was excessive but they do have alot of good information on their site so worth a look to find out all the facts even if you then go on to do it with someone cheaper!

steffee · 23/08/2005 22:14

You can change the name for free!! You just need the correct wording - any solicitor can do it, or the CAB, or it might be in a book. I did my own because I changed my name, my dd's and my ds2's and lost my certificate in the post, so I just re-typed it and sent it off to change my driving license and my bank details. It's perfectly legal.

You can change your name as soon as you start to call yourself (or your ds or dd) by the new name, all a deed poll certificate does is state it.

Sorry this is so long, but I spent £80 on deed poll certificates last year and they were a con - if you want, CAT me and I will copy out the words you need. You will need two witnesses to watch you sign it.

spursmum · 23/08/2005 22:15

Well I have just done it online for £18. The documents should be with me in 4 working days just in time for the new school term.
Im now happy that ds now has no ties to a man who does not want to acknowledge him.

bubblerock · 23/08/2005 22:19

My Stepkids use their mothers name but I don't think she did it legally just started using her name when they were little. I think it was just easier for them because she went on to have more kids and 3 different surnames would get a bit confusing. We still refer to them using our surname and it doesn't cause any problems although we do now have a really good relationship with the ex wife.

Original poster

MascaraOHara · 24/08/2005 17:03

thanks for all this info. it's been really useful!

Now I know it's possile I'll have to think long and hard about it.

Before school next year would be a good time if I do it and dd will be old enough to have some input.

Cod, what's your experience? I'm interested to hear negative points as well so can make the 'right' decision.

I have wondered about waiting and then changing her surname once I'm married (huge assumption being made there)

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liandme · 24/08/2005 17:17

my dd starts school in sept and i am getting married in oct when i asked if she could be called my married name they said not a problem but it will go down as her chosen name is this different to deed poll

Original poster

MascaraOHara · 25/08/2005 12:55

yes it is.. chosen name is something that you are called but you can't use your chosen name for official things (you must still use your official name)

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