Feel embarrassed about splitting up with DH

[SingleMumAndProud]

Although I know I am better off without him and I am 99% sure we have done the right thing splitting up, not many people know he has moved out (nearly 2 weeks ago)

I am 23 and have a failed marrage and am a single mum to 2 toddlers.

I REALLY regret getting married. I find it so scary to think I could be divorced by the time I am 24.

Especially as everybody was always very at us getting married so young. We have been married for 3 years, together for 5 and our children are 1 and 2.

How do I get past this feeling of "failure"/"embarrasment"? Thats one of the main things holding me back at the moment. On the whole, I am quite positive about us splitting up.

I am in the same position as you (though older!!) and I have got past that feeling because I told myself it is really common these days and absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.

No-one judges you harsher than yourself so you need to give yourself a break!

You sound like you are quite positive and have come to the conclusion that life will be better in the long run without your husband living with you and the kids - and ultimately it will be better for your kids to grow up in a happy household.

So you need to get out there, hold your head up high and be proud that you are a good mum who is doing the right thing for her kids, and the right thing for herself!

Thank you!

Its the age thing that really bugs me. Nobody else I know my age is even married, let alone getting divorced!

If I was older then it wouldn't bother me much as it is so common nowadays.

So many ppl get married and divorced nowadays there's nothing to be embarrassed about. As I often say, you are almost weird now if you are happily married with 2 kids.

So look at it as though you are ahead of the curve. I had my kids young, single dad when I was still young. Now all my friends are only now getting married/divorced & kids and I'm like "been there, done it!"

To be honest, I was more embarrassed about the failure of my 2nd relationship.

Hi SingleMumAndProud
I know EXACTLY how you feel. I felt the same way about splitting from my xp - we had not know each other long before we moved in decided to have a family so after a few years and 2 kids I felt ashamed of a this. However, 18 months on and having met ALOT of other single mums, its 99% worn off so i am sure will be the same for you. Dont bother telling people til you feel like it - its your business - i mean acquaintances rather than kids nursery and stuff, where might help to have a word,
Good luck xx

Thanks

im 25 also married and split from my husband a year ago when i was also 24 i know exactly how you feel... but you will get through it... you have nothing to be ashamed about!

Don't worry about telling everyone yet. I left it a month or so before I told friends, and some people didn't know for a few months. I told the dc's nursery and they were great and kept an eye on the dc's for me.

Please don't think it's the end of the world being divorced by 24, you have all the time in the world to build your own new life.

better to be divorced now with all the time in the world than to wait longer and find it harder to move forward than you will now.

Good luck with your positive future wherever it may take you x

I was divorced at 23, met someone else and after 30 years with him, I'm now on my own again.

As other posters have said, it's much easier to build a new life at your age.

There's no need for embarrassment, you know you've made the right decision for yourself and your children, you've taken the first step and the only way is up from now on