SlummyMummy - I think so much depends on who you have as a midwife. With my first baby (nearly 3 years ago) I was at QM's, induced at term plus 12 due to low amniotic fluid, and my first mw was fab. Sadly shift changed and second mw not so fab - not bad, but not as helpful eg didn't help me get breathing right when contractions came, I ran out of g&a because she was writing notes etc. However we got through it! The team on the wards were helpful but overstretched.
So I'm guessing whichever you choose, there's no knowing whether you'll get a really supportive mw or not. Only way around this is to have an experienced/good birth partner or get a doula, I guess...
Re not going to the hospital before end of pregnancy, that's the usual I think. I only went to QM's first time when booking in, for my antenatal classes, and for appointment at 40wks. The rest of my care was with community mw who at that time was based at my GP.
Are you booked in for any antenatal classes/refresher? It would give you a chance to suss the place out. Otherwise there are hospital tours (which your birth partner can go on too) but apparently they are busy and get booked up quickly.
I'm due again at end June, so may be able to update in a while...