Please can I ask that you all be aware of people with special needs or in wheelchairs whilst festival adventuring this month and help when you can.
This morning I helped a lady with her coffee tray to her table, she had a walking stick and staff where ignoring her obvious difficulty. A lot of my festival travelling time is spent using my son's wheelchair to act as a guard to people unsteady on their feet with walking sticks etc who are in real danger of being knocked over by oblivious crowds. A bit of kindness goes a long way.
I know it seems obvious to be careful but today at a book festival show for children my son in his buggy wheelchair was bashed repeatedly and shouted over by another adult until we moved from his front row reserved seat (with the help of other parents) to the back for his own protection. We were there with friends but only one seat had been reserved for us and other parents refused to move and let us sit together (there were plenty of seats if they had just budged up a couple). Our friends ended up at the end of the row behind so totally out of helping distance.
Then at the back and out of the way I sat him on my knee for a bit to calm the spasms set off by the bashing and another adult came in and stood by the door at the back over us for the rest of the show. This self appointed door guard adult at one point grabbed the wheelchair "get this out of the way" and directed another member of the audience to climb over us to get to empty seats. At this point I did tell him not to touch the wheelchair and to use the entire row of empty seats on the other side please, backed up by another parent in front of us who was very supportive (thank you). There were free seats everywhere, we were clearly annoying this chump for some reason. This guy continued to stand over us for the rest of the show, this intimidates my son because he is worried about being pushed or shoved and can't see what someone hovering is about to do next. I couldn't even leave because he was blocking the door and continued to block us in after the show whilst everyone left until I pretty much pushed my way past.
Staff should have intervened, I have called the box office and asked for more staff awareness but please please ask all parents to keep their eyes peeled and look after vulnerable audience members. There are some real idiots out there and we need herd protection. Adult shows tend to have better seating arrangements ime, kid shows are a free for all but it is never the children who are the bullies - always adults.
Some guidance:
ask "can I help?"
don't stand over or lean over someone in a wheelchair or push them out of the way, it is very nerve wracking - give space, lots of space
don't bump a wheelchair or lean on it - you can set off discomfort or injury
don't push past or climb over a disabled person
be understanding about seating arrangements for disability
don't pass or carry things over a disabled person (trays with hot drinks etc)
don't use a wheelchair to lean on or help you up
let wheelchairs carry on their path when you are capable of stepping aside around them
give people with walking sticks or unsteady gait plenty of room
don't stare
give disabled people back up and protection against muppets!
Thank you to the parents who helped us this morning, I would have cried if you hadn't. This happens a lot, it is a sad fact that some people view those who are more vulnerable as a mere inconvenience or a soft target for bullying. I generally try to avoid confrontation because I do not want to dent my son's self esteem. No child wants to be different or marked out from his peers.
Children's shows seem to illicit special grumpiness from some people because they have had to store their buggy elsewhere whilst my son is allowed in with his not very small essential wheelchair buggy. If only I had some way of explaining to these people that being seriously ill is a good reason for needing wheels and I would far rather we had health on our side and no need for the wheels.
For the two people who bullied us at that show there were two who helped us move and went and sat on the floor with the children so my son could see from the back. Thank you to those who looked out for us, please all of you do the same wherever you can and help everyone have a lovely inclusive festival.