Private Elective C-Section

[Marabunta]

Hi everyone, I am looking for some advice about having an elective C-section privately (and please don't give me a hard time about it!!!)

I have two DDs already, both of them were born at Kingston Hospital, natural births, absolutely no pain relief!!! Although I can't say I had dreadful experiences, they could have been better.

I went into labour with first DD at midnight. After calling the hospital several times (my contractions were less than a minute apart and I was bleeding for over an hour), and being told to "have a bath and don't come to hospital yet as first time mums don't have quick labours", we finally decided to stop calling and begging and just turn up (it was 4 am by then), to find there were no beds available. I spent my transition stage on all fours in the reception area in full view of other patients waiting. When they finally admitted me, I was made to walk to the delivery room (even though I was by now fully dilated and the baby was strongly pushing down). There was no time to administer intravenous antibiotics (which I had to have due to me being Strep B positive) or any type of pain relief (I was only offered gas and air and it made me sick). Baby got distressed and doctor told me she would have to be delivered by forceps if I didn't push her out. I pushed so hard that I ended up with a 3rd degree tear. Ironically I had to be given a spinal block afterwards to be stitched up in theatre, as tear was so bad. Baby had swallowed meconium and had to be monitored for 24hr in case of infection (from the Strep B bacteria, I guess, although no one told me this at the time). Luckily she had no complications and I recovered well. At my 6 week check up (doctor didn't even examine me to see if I had healed properly "down there", he just asked me "are you having toilet accidents?") it was written in my notes that my next baby would have to be delivered by C-section due to such a major tear.

Over two years later, I became pregnant with my second DD. I mentioned at my booking appointment about the tear and C-section, but they had no records of it and brushed off saying my delivery had been uncomplicated and I wold be following the natural birth route again.
I was probably too naive to argue my case, and just went with it, although I spent most of my pregnancy doing research and agonising over the idea of tearing again and becoming incontinent for life!

Second time around I made sure I went to hospital with plenty of time to have antibiotics and pain relief if I so wished. Nurse kept fiddling with the needle trying to find my vein for the intravenous antibiotic drip while I was having contractions and ended up giving up as "my vein was too small and she couldn't find it". I was past caring by then, as I was in so much pain, and no relief again. I tried asking for an epidural but they dismissed me as I was too dilated and ready to push. Once again, no antibiotics and no pain relief, but once again, luckily enough baby didn't have any infection and, although I tore again, it wasn't as bad as the first time, so I had no complications either (although I remember the midwife stitching me up "in situ" with no pain relief (ouch!!).

Anyway, it's been 7 years since the birth of my second DD and now at 41, I am pregnant with my third... And looking back at my two births, although I am extremely proud that I had two natural births, no pain relief, I don't feel as mentally or physically strong this time... My pelvic floor muscles are definitely not what they used to be and I am extremely worried that I won't be as lucky this time, and another tear would leave me incontinent this time. I have already mentioned to the midwife about the Strep B. She said that being positive in the past doesn't mean I would be positive now, but she didn't offer me a test (I am considering having this done privately). In spite of my age, she has casted me as "low risk" and already defaulted me for a natural birth. We have now moved house and I am having all my ante natal care at St Peter's Chertsey. We are quite new to the area and I don't really know many people who have had babies there, but I have read a few horror stories about the place...

The more I think about all the risk factors I potentially have, the more I am worrying about having a natural birth again. I have never been in favour of elective C-section, but I am seriously considering one although I know I probably don't have a powerful enough reason for it and I won't be offered one at St Peter's. I am 27 weeks now and getting so anxious that often go to bed in tears...

I have been looking at the possibility of going the private route and have been looking at the Portland, Lindo Wing and Kensington Wing. Am I being too paranoid? Has anyone gone this route? Is the peace of mind worth the cost? Would I be making the right decision by electing to have a C-section instead of trying for a natural birth again? I can't think of anything else at the moment and feel time is running out... I am seeing my midwife on Friday and will mention it to her and see what she says although I suspect she won't be in favour of it...
Any opinion would be much appreciated. Thanks!

Hello

I've had four children the last via caesarian (not Private) and the experiences are not comparable.

Caesarian all the way.

Yes, you're a bit sore afterwards but it's nothing compared with all the cutting/tearing & stitches.

Hope that helps a little.

Three out of my five births were c-sections (not my choice) if you can afford it & it's worrying you, then it's surely your choice to decide.

Just make sure they do you up nicely - I'm 8st but still have a muffin top that I can't shift after 13 years (I think they stapled me up too tightly!)

My last 4 deliveries were at the Royal Surrey in Guildford & I could not fault their care.

Sorry - another thing- your MW may well try to talk you out of it, as it is classified as major abdominal surgery, but if you have made up your mind then tell her so & she can advise you accordingly. It's important for you and your baby that you don't spend the rest of your pregnancy getting stressed out. Good luck & let us know how it goes

I had my last baby at St Peter's. I was in the midwife led birth centre and it was amazing. I can't fault them but obviously this is not what you're looking for.

As I understand it, you can insist on them giving you a c section, you don't need to go private. If I were you, at my next MW appointment I would explain that due to very bad experiences with your previous labours you are incredibly anxious and want a c section. I have had friends who have requested c sections for similar reasons and they have been given them.

Hi OP! I understand how you're feeling. I have had two labours. The first was 24 hours back to back which ended in ventouse. The second was better and I had only gas and air but tore badly. I had a spinal block to repair a third degree tear. It still gives me pain sometimes, eight years on.

I am fretting I'm pregnant at the mo. I really shouldn't be pregnant but... there is always a chance albeit very, very small. And I was pondering that if I was I would have to have a c-section because I am not going through that again.

I think a pp is right, you should be able to have a c-section on the NHS with your history. You might need to be adamant about it with several different people over a period of time. Could your DH come to an appointment and fight your corner? I know it's hard to do sometimes for yourself. You need to mention that it is affecting your mental health. You shouldn't be in tears every night, bless you.

I wanted an acupuncturist at my last birth (I was chucking everything at it by that point!) and because I guess it was fairly unusual and would mean an extra birthing partner, they made me an appointment to see the Head of Midwifery who was fantastic! She agreed to having the acupuncturist there no problems and more or less debriefed me about my previous birth which was eight years before. (I know, big gaps!)

I think if you meet with opposition from midwives (who, let's face it, are probably told to keep the number of elective caesareans down), I would make an appointment to see someone higher up. They should have your notes, ridiculous to say they have no records from your first birth. They should believe you in any case! I'm very annoyed on your behalf OP.

Please keep saying you need to have a caesarean. I would mention everything that went wrong in the last two births and how fortunate that things were ok with the babies and you, but you're not willing to take the risks again, what with being older now (sorry OP!) and your previous birth injuries. ( I would certainly do a private Strep B test too) Take good care and I hope it all works out, whatever route you take. Remember the squeaky wheel gets the oil! Lots of love xx

St Peter's has improved a lot in recent years- compared to friends who used it years ago and now, it seems a lot better. They have a Birth Reflections service which is well worth doing - you talk thru your birth notes with a midwife who is trained in counselling and she then talks about your different options and flags up on your notes what you need for the next birth. That avoids things like being sent away by the midwives when you first turn up at maternity! I did Birth Reflections a couple of months ago and found it really helpful - I now understand a lot more about my birth experience.
www.asph-maternity.org/news/50-work-of-birth-reflections-midwife-nationally-recognised
You totally have the right to have a caesarean if you want one.

I had mine at Frimley and had 2 elective c-secs. They'll try to talk you out of it but as long as you say you've thought about it, have good reasons etc, you'll get there.