Moving to Lewes in 4 weeks and counting.. Single Mum.. Bit daunted!

[Genevieve947]

Hello, I've never posted on Mumsnet before but I've read loads of supportive advice on other threads and I thought I'd give it a try! I'm moving to Lewes really soon, and simultaneously starting a new job in Brighton. I've got nursery for my DS sorted, and excited to move to new house, but I'm feeling a bit daunted about moving as a single Mum to a new area where I don't know a soul! Can anyone give me a heads up on how/ where to meet people/ help out in the community/ generally be of use?! I've got scary visions of being a billy-no-mates with a takeaway for one, and on a serious note this is the first experience DS and I will have had of being on our own, as up until now we've all lived together in London (ex and I get on very well but he's moving on to Kent).

Any suggestions/ comments to alleviate my burgeoning fears would be great! Just feeling a bit overwhelmed about moving/ settling DS into nursery/ starting new job all in the same week!!

Thank you all :)

Hi Genevieve, This is my first post & reply as am in the same boat. How are you? Have you moved yet? You are very brave but I am sure you will meet people. Look on meetup as there are single mums groups in Brighton maybe in Lewes and other groups for whatever you are into. You can also set up your own if you want to but costs. I have been coming down to the area as recovering from post concussion syndrome after a fall & knocks to the head. Am finding it super friendly, helpful. Anyway been loving it so much, thought I would start looking at places & of course have seen a place I really like. Only problem is I have a 10 year old who is away & doesn't want to move obv school, friends. Am finding where I live & thought of travelling through London too much. Hardly seen anyone but thing Brighton/Hove area easier to meet people. Love the greenery & sea all around. Am deciding what to do shortly. Good luck with the new job, move etc. Always daunting at first but once adjust sure will be fine. Glad get on with ex. I don't really. Let us know how goes because I may be coming soon too!

Hi Nathfr!

Do it, move to Lewes!! Thanks for your reply, I really appreciate it; and in all seriousness, I really sympathise with feeling torn about moving a ten year old. So tricky.
One thing I've found out since posting and doing more researching/ asking around is how happy the teenagers round there seem to be. Good schools, good friendship groups, and from walking around the town the kids just seem to be quite respectful of each other. They also seem to have more independence and self reliance (by far) than I see alot of kids here in London having, I have seen alot of lovely groups of young people since I've visited in the summer holidays. So, if you do decide Lewes is the place for you, I think you'll probably have a very happy/ rounded teenager growing up. Plus moving at the beginning of secondary school is at least a more natural break, as kids obviously move on from primary and friendship groups shift. So it could be a good time, in that sense? Ah, but I feel for your little one; it's not really the moving in a way, it's just the whole thing of growing up and becoming a teen that makes them feel a bit clingy to their childhood friends, I think.

I've only got a week or so before I move now, and I feel half calm and half in denial! I have started mentally redecorating my house so that's a good thing, and even more amazingly, I've discovered another mum is moving to Lewes with her LO who is at the same nursery/ same age as mine, and she's sending her LO to the same nursery as I'm sending mine to! Can't believe it! Amazing, so I will know someone, and so will my child haha! Also I totally understand the desire to move out of a busy city after a traumatic experience, it puts alot in perspective, and the business of a city can out pressure on anxieties that you could do without.

If you do decide to move, definitely post on here and look me up!! I'm so excited about Lewes now :) one of the best decisions I've ever made I think!

Hi Genevieve947 I did exactly the same as you a year or so ago and have no regrets. Lewes is a fantastic place to live - on the surface it seems quite twee and polite - tea shops and lovely little twisty turning lanes - but underneath that you have a much darker, artier side with a real community feel.

I've heard good things about ALL the primary schools here, and DD is due to start hers in September after being at a lovely welcoming nursery for a year. We have met some friends through nursery but - if you're so inclined - there are lots of groups you can join - community choir, cake clubs, stitch and bitch etc - and we've been made to feel very welcome despite being DFL (Down From London - although we're not from London, it's just a term used generically for anyone outside Lewes )

If you like I can PM you and we can meet for coffee once you're here and settled. There are river walks, parks, The Grange, a nature reserve and endless brilliant cafes so let me know how you get on.