DD's name unpronounceable in French - WWYD?

[usedtoreadbooks]

We have recently moved to France, where DD's name is unpronounceable and therefore unknown. Pronounced as you would read it in French, it sounds very different to the English pronunciation but, IMO, equally lovely. Since she is too young to choose one or the other (19m) I am inclined to let her have both versions, which she can alternate between, depending on whether she is talking / being addressed by someone French or English. PIL is strongly against this but hasn't fully explained why other than to say that he knows lots of people with foreign names and makes the effort to pronounce them correctly. Can it do any harm to let her have two different-sounding versions of her name, at least until she can choose for herself? What would you do?

usedtoreadbooks - I would stick with the original/real pronunciation, or closest thing to it, given that most French people won't be able to pronounce the 'th' sound. "Zan-tee"?

My name is very different to anything the French are used to, but I persevered for a while and now everyone says it correctly. No th sounds, though.

(connard = asshole, by the way).

I had the same problem in Spain - I just used the nearest Spanish equivalent with strangers - friends just did the best they could with my proper name. With dd we mostly used the Spanish pronunciation of her full name, then used an English-ly pronounced shortening at home.

My name is Heather; in France I am Ezzair . I quite like it!

Ezzair is fab!

My name is Lynn and my MIL still calls me Loon.

She is German. I actually quite like it now that I have gotten used to it. Been with my DH for over 17 years.

I would have two versions, depending on what language is being used. PIL's will just have to put up with it.

I had exactly the same problem in Switzerland, it always grated when I used the german pronunciation of my name to introduce myself as I felt like I was talking about someone else but then I was a teenager when we moved there. However, my Mum always pronounced my name in English weirdly, she's Swiss, so I was kind of used to two versions from a young age, I just had to add another .

We were conscious of this issue when picking names.

Both have names which are almost identical in French and English.

DS name has one vowel sound in it which is pronounced very slightly differently in French and in English.

DDs name is pronounced the same in both languages but the French put the emphasis on the last syllable and we put it on a different one.

They both say they have a French name and an English name.

lol at loon (makes it funnier that it's your MIL!)

I have already picked internationally portable names which work in English, French, Dutch and Italian. Bonus points if it works in Arabic and Chinese.....

Sorry not to have got back to this earlier. Thanks everyone for your help.

CoteD'Azur - one of the reasons I dislike the French approximation of Xanthe - you have it right when you say "Zan-tee" - is because it sounds so much like "santé". Sorry, but I am going with the majority Zonte, with joy and relief.

Ezzair is brilliant, as is Loon.

frAKKINPannikin - How long did it take you to come up with names that work in all those languages??

And no, I didn't believe the Babelfish translation either. But at least my FIL's point is proved right - it doesn't matter how you pronounce a name, people make the effort and eventually all associations are overriden.

Still sticking to Zonte though

Dd & Ds were born in France.
Ds is called Joseph (shortened to Joe, pronounced equally nice in both languages)

Dd is called Morgane - pronounced the English way (now)& she hates it pronounced the French way (she's 3.2yo!) but I like the French way. I live in the Uk now but if we ever go back to France it will be pronounced the French way no doubt - which I LOVE

Grace, is beautiful in English pronounciation terms but in French - nasty imo!

Its pronounced "Grasssss"

There are not many and it took a lot of time and research but I was bored and broody! Most 'classic' names will transfer, the stresses may be different but at least it won't be unpronouncable, unlike me! I'm Frances in English, France (with the horrid r) in French, something which sounds like Vrunzis in Dutch, Francesca in Italian, Flan-ces in Chinese and it just sounds strange shoved in the middle of an Arabic sentance.

Admittedly the Italians add 'a' on the end to most of my chosen names but it's not that much of a stretch from Isabel to Isabella, Katrin to Katrina etc

The French/English barrier is the most important one - so I eliminated anything starting with R, anything with a soft TH....

@ Usedtoreadbooks
We live in France now (but NZ when DS1 was born) and my DH is French so we tried to find names that worked ok in both.

DS1 is Nicolas - spelt the French way but I pronounce it as in English (with the s) and DH as in French. We initially planned to call him Nico so that it would be the same in both, but actually it's no problem at all for him having it pronounced differently by different people - as you say, just like having a nickname. So I really wouldn't worry about it!

DS2 is Matisse - slight difference in pronunciation but not much.

My dd1's name is pronounced differently in flemish and english. It doesn't bother her, nor does it cause any confusion. I prefer english people to pronounce it the english way, and belgian people to pronounce it the belgian way. I cringe when english people try and pronounce it the flemish way.

slightly different scenario but I have a friend whose DD was initially named Alithea but changed to Alicia. Too late for some of us who started calling the DD Thea - Thea has stuck as a name, she uses it herself sometimes, especially when she was smaller as it was easier to say (and it suits her better than Alicia tbh); and now, aged 6, she has another name, donated by her cousin. So she is variously known as Thea, Alicia, and Flower. It doesn't confuse her, never has.

I think your DD's name is lovely, and the French pron. is ok too - but if you are worried, maybe give her a nn, like Zonny? Or something.

I think these are all beautiful names... we're pondering a move back to France and I just realized that my friend's prediction would come true: not such a great idea to name my son Ryan if we planned to stay in France. At the time I didn't care because we were moving back to California, but now that we're Paris-bound again... ay ay ay. Ryan... rien. Uh oh.

He may have to be a "middle name kid" just so he can go by Matthew/Mathieu.

Solferino, there are loads of kids called Ryan in France, due to an American TV show (I presume).
It'll be no problem.

I know of a Rien in Belgium. I assume a boy.