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Living overseas

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Original poster

Subtle Cultural Differences

98 replies

smugaboo · 22/12/2008 09:20

What subtle cultural differences have you noticed between your country of origin and the place you live now? Or between you and your partner who is from a country other than you?

I'm not talking about obvious stuff - but those things that you never counted on, and surprised you - and were hard to explain. I'll give a couple of examples:

My DP (English) says "there again", as in "there again, we could just skip dinner all together and go to the pub." I say "then again" in the same context. When I first heard him say it I thought he had gotten it wrong and I was a bit embarrassed for him. Whoops.

Another one, we say the "hokey pokey", as in 'doing the ...", but my dp swears it is the "hokey cokey" - and I have heard it sung that way since. How in the world did that happen? Chinese whispers?

D'ya know what I mean?

OP posts:

Bubbaluv · 02/01/2009 14:07

Some odd ones here re Aus. As far as I've ever known a Cornetto is a Cornetto - drumsticks are just another brandof similar icecream. Icypoles again just a brand of "iceblock". Squash refers only to lemon squash. A slide is called a slide just as often as Slipperdip. Also, have heard English people answer "good"to "how are you" very regularly. Obvioulsy Aus is big so there are regional differences, and England has regional differences from suburb to suburb!
The best one we've had was a friend (Aussie) in the UK talking about going off to Glastonbury and saying that she was going to wear thongs in the shower to avoid fungal infection. Got strange looks from her work colleagues who advised her to just avoid sitting on the floor!

thumbwitch · 02/01/2009 22:38

at bubbaluv.

Just watching Rab C. Nesbitt on tv (repeat) - I love it but DH can't even understand the words, let alone like it. So he has gone to bed. Scottish is clearly beyond him

mawbroon · 02/01/2009 22:47

Oh thumbwitch, I had to switch off Rab C the other night. I just didn't find it funny at all. Maybe your dh just doesn't like it because it's NOT FUNNY!

thumbwitch · 02/01/2009 22:55

did you find the previous series funny though, Mawbroon? I liked the ones with Wee Burnie best. No, DH REALLY can't understand it so doesn't even start to get it or know whether or not it's funny. I admit, I don't much like this episode.

mawbroon · 02/01/2009 22:58

Hmm, mildly amusing would describe how I found the old stuff.

Must be a cultural thing for me too. You know East/West thing. before I get lynched.

UpSinceCrapOClock · 02/01/2009 23:01

Ooh i love Rab C Nesbitt!

Dh (who doesn't have English as a mother tongue and learned it in Canada) always uses 'quite' as a superlative. When we started going out and I'd do the cooking, he'd often say 'it's quite nice' (thinking he was paying me a high compliment) and then I'd feel a bit flat and think 'oh ok' (thinking he was bloody hard to impress). Eventually it came about that we worked out it had different connotations for us.

Ear piercing on baby girls - dh's (Latin American) family are still horrified that I didn't get dd's ears pierced when she was born. They think I'm the cruellest mother in the world

thumbwitch · 02/01/2009 23:06

ohoh, upsincecrapoclock, that reminded me of another one - DH used to say (about his dinner or whatever) "that was all right" when he meant "that was really nice" - the lukewarm praise was very downheartening until he explained!

I went to Spain with my parents when I was 2 and everyone thought I was a boy because my ears weren't pierced (thankfully mum resisted the temptation to get them done)

foxytocin · 03/01/2009 03:16

everyone in the UAE immediately assumes dd2 (3 months old) is a boy (despite wearing pink many days) because her ears are not pierced.

CoteDAzur · 03/01/2009 09:52

Just remembered the horror I felt when living in Turkey as a child and realizing that our American neighbours were paying their children money so they would help around the house - $2 for washing dishes, etc.

I was super nice to these kids because I was of course sure that their parents didn't love them.

It was unthinkable to me (or any other local) that loving parents would have to pay their children for favors.

ninedragons · 03/01/2009 09:58

The pink/blue thing doesn't hold in China.

I would often take DD out dressed head-to-toe in pink and wrapped in a pink blanket (all gifts, I hasten to add) and be asked if she was a boy or a girl.

Bubbaluv · 03/01/2009 14:41

Oh, I thought of another one. The London/Essex "You alright?" meaning "how are you". My initial response was "yes, why?"
I thought I must look like I'd been crying or was in pain or something. Took quite some time to get used to that one.

arfishy · 04/01/2009 07:48

Oh I loved Italy. I really did. The coffee machines at work only had coffee - about 7 different types. No tea. Every day I'd get to work and by half past 9 we'd be in a local cafe drinking cappuccino (for the girls) and espressos (for the men).

If you went to a local shopping centre for lunch, for 4 euros you'd get food that was a higher quality than most Italian restaurants at home.

And the clothes were amazing. I am by nature a scruffy engineer but Italy changed all of that. The women were fearsomely gorgeous and competitive.

ErnestTheBavarian · 04/01/2009 13:51

bubbaluv - also the american "what's up" for basically 'hello'. That used to confuse me - nothungs up, I'm fine.

Big one I hate here is when the traffic light goes green, but the pedestrian crossing round the corner also gets a green man, so you get green to drive and then have somebody step right out in front of you. As a pedestrian it's also rather unnerving to get a green man, but neverthless a car come right at you.

mawbroon · 04/01/2009 14:44

Lots of Americanisms used to really annoy me.

Then I got in tow with my DH and his family who are partly Dutch, and so I learned Dutch and realised that many of these irritating Americanisms are literal translations from other languages. Now they don't annoy me quite so much....

thumbwitch · 04/01/2009 15:05

mawbroon, does that really annoying phrase "can i fix you some coffee/lunch/whatever?" fall into that from-Dutch category?

mawbroon · 04/01/2009 19:44

thumbwitch, I asked DH about that one.

He says that it's not a direct translation, but he thinks it could possibly be related.

The word "makken" in Dutch means to make (which is what you would do with the lunch or coffee or whatever) but it can be also sort of be used to mean to fix. eg beter makken is to heal, goed makken is to mend.

Bear in mind that America was a big mix of people from everywhere that it could well have got muddled a bit in translation.

But DH isn't a linguist, so this could all be completely wrong.

thumbwitch · 04/01/2009 21:46

thanks mawbroon - I still find it a really annoying term to use instead of make - it's not like the coffee/ lunch/ whatever is broken, is it!

arfishy · 05/01/2009 09:34

Ah I'm very fond of Dutch. We lived in Amsterdam for about 4 years. A very interesting language.

mawbroon · 05/01/2009 13:08

I have found it really interesting too arfishy. I just love it when there is a word that I know exactly what it means because it is the same word as in Scots, and all the funny ones like "handschoenen" make me laugh.

Not that my dutch is very good of course, but we all have to start somewhere!

arfishy · 06/01/2009 09:57

Gloves! Yes, it was also interesting doing my Dutch class with a load of South Africans, as they speak 'Olde' Dutch (Afrikaans).

Did you hear the tale about the war - the Dutch military used to test for spies by asking people to pronounce 'Scheveningen' - they could always weed out the non-Dutch, even if they'd been schooled in Dutch.

I most definitely can't pronounce it! Ditto 'Van Gogh' without sounding like I am choking.

mawbroon · 06/01/2009 12:42

Yes, have heard the Scheviningen story. Have even been there, but not sure I can spell it!!

I can do the g sound ok-ish. Being Scottish is a distinct advantage though.

catepilarr · 27/01/2009 17:02

bavarian, its the same with the green man for pedestrians and the cars from round the corner here in czech rep. is it not like that in the uk? cnat remember...
interesting /cultural/ difference had a thread on mumsnet and that was about asking visitors in your home to take outside shoes off. in my country noone would walk into your home with shoes on but in the uk it more common to keep your shoes on.

Sibble · 27/01/2009 17:33

Most people would take their shoes off here in NZ too. I have been told it's because the chinese/Asian people do it and there's a high Asian population here. The custom has 'rubbed off'.

The other thing they do here is look you directly in the eyes. My MIL used to do it and it really unnerved me. When she came to stay with us in London she commented how rude people were as they 'wouldn't look at her'. I said if she kept staring at people she was likely to get into trouble if she came across a 'nutter.'

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