Moving to Virginia with young family, any advice on meeting other mums?

[RedPowerRanger]

I'm moving to Reston, Virginia with DH and our two young sons in January '09. My older son is 3 years old now and the younger one is 3 months old. DH is a lot more hyped up about the move and I'm less so because it means starting over again with two young children. We moved to our current home nearly three years ago and I made some good friends through local toddler groups and classes. I think that'll have to be the way to make friends again in Virginia but what's the equivalent of toddler groups there and how do I find out about them?

Any MNs with experience of raising v. young family in Virginia and how to meet other mums in Reston?

we had dog ticks daily. Poor ds1 had one on his head nearly every night. He must of tasted good.
I once felt something crawling in my hair while I was chatting on the phone. Felt around and pulled it. Look. large dog tick! screamed and dropped the phone. My friend thought I'd been attacked!
Didn't get any hiking in the Shenandoah cos I bleated, 'stay in the middle of the path, don't touch the undergrowth' like a demented harridan but we did walk round a corner and meet a bear. I don't like bears either!
Kids found one once that must have fed and fallen off. Size of a grey grape with wriggly legs. I nearly threw up as I'm paranoid about ticks and hate them more than anyhting. Ticks did figure into my decision to come home!
I wish I'd met you. I ended up going to tedius scrapbooking parties with Stepford Wives, you get to play rugger with lesbians.

Wow - daily?! I think I would have been freaking out too. But I do like bears! I took this photo from the car, though. Feels much safer that way - I never even got my camera out when I saw them on foot. I just backed away swiftly!

Wish I'd met you too! But I vaguely remember that your youngest is school age, so you would have been home by the time we arrived.

Sorry OP! I'll stop hijacking your thread now!

we came back dec 2003

Hello. I am about 40 mins away in one of the Maryland suburbs of DC. I would definitely recommend living in the suburbs closer to DC if you can. There are lots of expats closer into DC. Old Town Alexandria is very walkable and lots to do, but you will have a much smaller house there. It depends whether a big house or walkable community is more important. I'm afraid I don't really know Reston but it is close to the airport. Are you coming over for a reccie visit?

Forgot to say, I love it here!

If you are looking for pre-school for your older son then this might help:
www.insiderpages.com/s/VA/Reston/Preschools

don't you have to pay for preschools?

Yes, you do pay for pre-schools here. Do you get a good relocation package from your employer? It might be included?

Sorry, question was directed at RedPowerRanger, not Needmorecoffe who is not here anymore!
Needmorecoffee, did you ever get used to the heat?

no, I never tolerated the heat. But a/c really put up the electrcity bill!
I did like seeing fireflies and hearing cicadas though.
Sometimes i'd think, oh, if I go slow I'll cope with the heat. Nope, enevr happenend.

How about you, Twirl? Do you mind the heat? I am the least heat-tolerant person in the world, but I managed to play rugby in it! I think I did actually get used to it in the end. And it's always cooler in the mountains - we used to drive up to Shenandoah (just over an hour away) to feel the cool breeze.

You're right - smaller places further in, but it was well worth it for us. American places come up large compared to British ones anyway. A lot will depend on the expat package, to be fair. We had help with rent, for example.

So glad to hear someone else having fun out there!

Can someone please tell me what yummy mummys are.

I think I have been in the US too long, (nearly 15 years), as every now and then I come accross words on MN that I have never heard.

I have to say I love it and and working them in to my daily conversation nuch to the amusment of my work mates.

Anyway I am not in, or close to Virginia (I live in Colorado), but I have spent a lot of time in WDC and find it a great place to visit and have never felt at risk.

Thanks

UF, NMC, Wow. Thank you both so much. I've gotten DH to read your posts now and we think we'll look at areas that aren't Reston. He's going to do a quick search on what the rents are like in Alexandria.

NMC, I had to grin at your reply to the Have you met Jesus question. Good one.

I think I'll stay away from talking about religion and abortion then..thanks for the heads up, UF. And had been worried about ticks. But if Lyme Disease is rare even if you get tick bites, then wouldn't be so worried about the older one running around outside.He's so energetic that we spend a lot of times outdoors even in winter.

UF, we plan to drive to NY and to go into DC a lot for the museums for ourselves and the boys. DH has been to the wholefoods place and he told me that it sounds like I'll be very happy getting our stuff from there.

You know, I am looking forward to this - it is an adventure. At the same time, I want to be as prepared as I can, so I research and research a thing... (I'm a born control freak. Midwife told me to relax after the umpteenth time I asked her about what labour would be like in my antenatal visits and I asked her to recommend a book on relaxation. You shoulda seen the look on her face .

Both of you, you are not withering on. Tell me more! About the people, the food, oh! and how does it work if you need to go to the gp?

Oops!!! Sorry MNs, didn't see page 2 of the thread til now.

Twirl, probably not doing a reccie visit beforehand, but would like to. My dh employer is covering two weeks accommodation, so we have two weeks to find somewhere to live. Community definitely more important than big house, so all your posts have decided it for me. I'm going to look closer into DC, at the places you have all recommended. The move package doesn't cover pre-schools.

What do ticks that carry Lyme Disease look like? Are they really tiny?

And NMC, I'm getting the heebeegeebies just reading your post about the large ticks.

you'll have health insurance and you pick a family doc for you n dh and a paediatrcian from a list your insurance covers and register with them. Hope you like form fillling. you can see a doctor witout insurance approval but any procedure the doc recommends you call your insurance and checkits ok that they'll pay for it first. Even with insurance its usual to co-pay about $20 when you see the doctor and co-pay on medication - that varies, sometimes the co-pay can be thousands for a certain drug, sometimes a few dollars.
Deer tixks that carry lyme disease are pinprich size. Dog ticks are the size of your little fingernail and black/brown, they swell to grape size once attatched . Just check through your kids hair and behind the ears and groin most evenings if they've played outside.

Your dh should look for a rental now as it can take a while to arrange. We were paying $3000 a month rental as dh had to find in a hurry.
Food - in Wholefoods you can get European cheeses. American cheese is tasteless. US chocolate is disgusting so take a suitcase stuffed with choc US baked beans are vile and not vegetarian but there's a place called World Market up in Sterling (few miles north of VA) that sells UK baked beans - Heinz for $2 a can. We had to buy those as my kids are baked bean addicts. I never found any American bread I liked and I tried it all so made my own. Eating out is much cheaper than here and much easier but you must tip. You get free coke n coffee re-fills in most places. Chips are called fries, biscuits are cookies and scones are biscuits. Crisps are chips - Lays is almost like ours and pretty good.
Do go to Trader Joes in Reston. Lots of tasters all the way round. I used to cycle over and stuff my face
Cycling is difficult as Americans aren't used to cyclists and do not pull out to overtake safely. I used to get called freak by people driving by. People drive to the Old Dominion Trail bike path and cycle along it as 'leeesure' not use bikes as transport.

There's a World Market in the Tyson's Corner area too, if you really need those beans!

DH and I found a place in two weeks, but we ended up staying in a hotel a week or so longer while our container turned up! We paid $2600 a month for a place with two massive bedrooms in Ballston in Arlington. Like NMC, we didn't need to spend that much, but we were in a rush! Anywhere in Arlington is good, but close to a metro is best - Ballston, Virginia Square, Clarendon and Rosslyn are the names of the Arlington stations. They're on the orange line and you can walk from Ballston to Rosslyn in 40-45 minutes. Alexandria also has multiple metro stops (on the blue/yellow lines). King Street is the one you want. Long and Foster is a big local realtor for Alexandria and Arlington, so if you don't have anywhere else to start, you could start by talking to them. Good luck!

realtors - you only need one. Its not like estate agents here. Realtors search ALL houses for rent or too buy rather than like our estate agents who have a certain amount on their books.
You can buy transformers so can run your UK equipment in the US - I used one to run UK TV and video in the basement.
Mobile phones - you pay for 'air time' so you are paying even when someone calls you

Thanks so much both of you. Think I'll make a trip out there next month and check out the places you mentioned, see a few houses and we'll go from there.

I'm not good in the heat either but you learn to cope and wear minimal clothing! and yes, our AC bills are way high!
We nearly moved to Old Town Alexandria and when I looked into it I found lots of kids activities - a great bookshop with storytelling sessions and some community centers with classes and moms groups. It has some fun shops, waterfront, parks, and lots of annual festivals. I haven't been to Arlington but you have lots of good advice from the others.
We used Long and Foster and they were very helpful.

Just remembered that another mumsnetter weewilliewinkie moved to Virginia about a year ago, I think she is in Falls Church, VA. It might be worth trying to track her down as I'm sure she could help you out with advice too!

don't wear minimal clothing in the winter. Its buggery cold - way below freezing with a wind from Canada. Autumn and Spring are weird with temps being in the 80's one day and the 40's the next like a crazy thing.

Your computer should run on US leccy. There's a switch on the back to change it to 110 v, you just buy a US powercord.

Hi RPR

well remembered, Twirl - I was weewilliewinkie..

We have been in Falls Church for 16 months now and it's been ok, but I do find it hard to meet folk. DH is RAF so this is a military posting for us which will end next summer. I do go to a British wives tots group sometimes but apart from that I really haven't met any American 'moms' - they can seem like a different breed sometimes! I thought that when ds started school I'd meet lots of folk but they all seem to keep to themselves. I have been findig it quite a lonely existence but that's just me. Other expats seem very happy here.

Falls Church is ok to live in but I would def rather be in Old Town Alexandria - it's miles nicer, has atmosphere, nice shops, bars, restaurants etc. It will be very expensive to rent there though, I would imagine, but the extra cost might be worth it. We don't go into DC all that much - but it's true the museums are free and worth a visit, esp the Natural History one, and I hear there's a children's Science centre opening soon. (Next year?) Falls Church is about 6 miles outside DC and only takes about 20 minutes to get in, so it's handy when your have guests over who want to do the sights! I have seen the Lincoln Memorial more times than I can count....

If there's anything I can help you with, do let me know. I'd be happy to have you over for a cup of tea! I have ds 4.8 and dd 21 months, with ds2 due on Xmas Day!