I have a "choice" of 3 cities (would be there for minimum of a year) Bejing/Miami/Abu Dhabi

[sagacious]

How do I choose?

Its DH's work and he has said I have the final say.

Have two children 6 and 4 and am happily settled in England

Oh and I've not been to any of them

ANY IDEAS?

"Sagacious indeed"

Miami was my gut instinct but i'm not hugely keen on any of them TBH.

It might not just be a year though
Could be up to five

Relocation support/expenses would be sorted by his company.

Gah !

if it might not be a year then go for miami. there is nothing worse than being ill in a foreighn language. at least in the states you'd be able to communicate.

Hi sagacious
Well Beijing - your dc are 6 and 4 so presume they will be at international school in the daytime and in an English speaking home environment apart from that, so I doubt they will pick up much Chinese in a year. It would be different if they were in a Chinese language daycare centre or with a Chinese nanny at home but that isn't going to be the case. I wonder what your accommodation would be like there. Not great I'd imagine and with 2 dc overseas, I would like some space and nice living conditions. Maybe you could look into the accommodation side of things.

Don't know what the expat wife scene is like there. You might get bored and also a bit frustrated dealing wtih everyday life without the language. Personally I wouldn't choose Beijing I don't think. Imagine it is a stressful city to live in with dc.

Abu Dhabi, presume you'd be living in an expat compound with a pool, so more sociable in that limited way. Hard to know whether you'd enjoy, manage that or get cabin fever. Restrictive life as a woman outside the compound of course. I'd do it for a year if it meant furthering dh's career considerable or substantial savings possible. Otherwise personally I wouldn't fancy it these days either.

Miami would be easiest.

well asn award winnign travel writer i wodul day dont go anwyahere
stay at hom,e

Not HAVE to
It would me hugely advantageous to his career

Plus shallow the financial aspect is VERY tempting

Bugger

(and yes I know oh to have such problems...)

would go somewhere compltely outside of my own culture & experience - what a great opportunity to really get to know somewhere different

maybe cardiff?

this website might be useful

yes, but only in abu dhabi will you be able to have a driver, cook, cleaner/nanny all for less than £300 a month...the expat community in the uae is amazing (the conversation is amazing) unlike in miami where you have to hide to smoke a cigarette and the community in miami isn't the safest if you compare to anywhere in the uae. miami- drug violence, gange violence and don't forget the daily immigration disputes your going to have to witness at the supermarket, on the street you live on, at the mall. miami is a great place to visit (i grew up in orlando (until i was 9), bu t my dad lived in miami for 4 yrs, so i was there on weekends.

oh and miami also has terrible tropical storms from may-september every year. do you really want to live in a place where theres atleast 3-5 evacuation alerts?

cardiff it is then

cardiff it is then

Miami - especially as you seem to suspect it might be for more than a year - so you will effectively be making your home there.

Beijing would be interesting to visit but personally wouldn't want to commit to living there for more than few months.

I would absolutely hate my children to brought up in the "expat lifestyle" of somewhere like Abu Dhabi. Yes the standard of living would be high there, but at who's expense? it would be like living in a bubble imo.

Oooo my hugely shallow emoticon went very strange.

SSS the expat compound sounds like my idea of hell

(when dh stays there hes at the Sheraton I think he has a slightly skewed idea of living arrangements!)

Unsure as to Beijing (you lot are really putting me off it!!)

miami definitely.

Cardiff sounds fab
Could do the Torchwood tour..

Oh eandz is Miami like that? I'm all set on beaches and 50's style Cadillac's.

the easy choice would be miami IMO but the interesting choice would be beijing.
for a year or so..

is there not anywhere else you can choose?

Think there are some MNetters in China (Shanghai though) but might be able to give you better idea. I'm sure someone from Abu Dabi will be along soon as well. We're in Singapore and went to Beijing last year on hols and personally I don't think I could live there especially with kids.

A colleague of mine lived in Miami for 2 years and loved it there. His kids are both grown up though so considerations a bit different.

don't do abu dhabi
my sister did - very hard

Mmj thanks for that link

Am off for a ponder
Thanks all have a lot to think about!

well it is never going to be ideal of course, there will always be some drawback. The thing is if you have NO choice, you just go where you have to go and make up your mind to make the most of it. It's hell having to decide

Don't think expat compounds are hell are earth. You'd survive it for a year but it is an artificial situation. Maybe a bit like what forces wives experience, I don't know. For one thing, you'd feel reasonably SAFE there. THe dc will have friends they can communicate with and there will be a lot of afternoon activities for them, they will presumably be able to wander about fairly freely on the compound and will be at school during the day anyway.

DH will be at work, you are the one most likely to go nuts there. What will you do all day? You'd have to really make up your mind to just get along with whoever there is there and it's hard to know if you'd find many people on your wave-length. I have a feeling you just couldn't be fussy and would have to make a huge effort to get along with whoever there is there IYSWIM.

Apart from being driven to an air-conditioned shopping centre, I don't know what you can do to pass the time of day really. You wouldn't be there all that much though, summer would be unbearable so presume you'd leave for summer. I have heard there are interesting outdoor sports type things you could do there. You could arrange for a tutor to come and give you Arabic lessons, if you fancied that. You could pick up some nice jewellery and artifacts, when the schools are closed, you could travel around the general area (this all defeats the purpose of saving a lot from dh's wage though!).

Miami due to the language thing. Have lived abroad (alone) and its hard work when you cannot communicate properly, wouldnt want to attempt it with 2 small DCs.

Have been to Beijing a few times and although I loved it, I think it would be quite a diffilcult place to bring up children.

Have also been to Abu Dhabi and think it would be easier than Beijing and you could have a very good standard of living, expat life etc.

Never been to Miami and have to desire what so ever to go....so can't comment.

I have the same experiences as Cardy.

Life is not restrictive for women in Abu Dhabi. you can drive and do anything you like, not like in Saudi where I have to wear an abaya and can't drive, go out with any male who I am not related to, except the driver and then I have to sit in the back. ( and I'm a white english women, not arabic)

I got bored in Bejing, despite visiting lots of kindergartens, nurseries. schools etc. Shanghai is better.