Moving to New York from Surrey, UK

[LMcKenz]

Hi, looking for advice on moving to New York from Surrey. Husband has been given an opportunity through work to start a new job working across manhattan (so doesn’t matter if we use Penn or GCS) to commute. I’ve been researching and lots of posts mention Westchester County - particularly Scarsdale, Rye etc. I just want to know the best family-friendly place that’s easily commutable into NYC? I’m 35, husband is 36 and we have a nearly 2 year old son and nearly 6 year old daughter. So schools/nurseries are also very important. Also really important for us to be able to make friends so we need somewhere sociable. I won’t be working so need to meet people quickly. Any advice really greatly appreciated!

Oh one insurance detail: By law, the catastrophic cap for insurance, for ALL out of pocket, in network expenses, must be something like $13K (it can be less, but cannot be higher) for the family. After that, you pay nothing. So you might have something like, $4K a person but $8K for the family (which would still be very high). But always check the cost sharing as it gets complicated. So I have a deductible up to one point, and then I pay 20% of costs up to a higher cap, or a flat rate for a doctor's visit. And then eventually I hit my catastrophic cap, and pay nothing at all. It is maddening to keep track of, your insurer will do it, but you must check.

Does DH's relocation package provide any school search services?

*than I did in London

@LMcKenz Lots of useful advice. We live in Manhattan. But did look in Hudson / Westchester. I think the Hudson side and Rye side have different vibes so do a proper recce. properly spend some time there.

We were originally in LA. When we moved over we negotiated shipping of belongings, lease on two cars (as we both needed to drive - husband to work and me school run etc) and first three months in air bnb. I appreciate we were lucky with this. We also negotiated the company paying for Green Card applications as they can amount to 5K per person and we were a family of 5. So a significant cost. We were also advised to start the Green Card process as soon as possible. So bear that in mind.

Oh and I also refused to move over with a fire ‘at will’ clause. You can be let go with two weeks notice. I just wasn’t prepared to uproot 3 children and risk that. It was tricky but he managed to negotiate a 3 yr fixed term contract. This was during Covid times and I’m glad I did. Although nothing happened with us I saw families move over and have to go back if they couldn’t find another job within a couple of months! I can’t imagine that stress.

Just some things to think about. A lack of credit score means significant money needed upfront. I think with rent we had to pay 3-4 months upfront.

Good luck.

If you think you might end up staying, presuming you have a relocation agent, let them know that. There are some areas of NYC and towns in the burbs that expats just don't look at because relocaters think we all want to live with other expats. And don't be snobby about looking at NJ (I was!). NJ has a lot to offer.

We moved to chappaqua when I was a child and my dad was commenting into the city. Everyone was very welcoming and the school was good. I think it may be expensive though.

New York absolutely REEKS of cannabis and filth. Do you really want your kids growing up there? I would do at least one long visit before deciding. It’s a crime-ridden city filled with people on ‘spice’ and other substances and it’s such a shame. There was not a single part of the entire city in which we felt remotely safe. I wouldn’t even visit with my child.

😂😂😂

I liked Phoebe’s response when Monica and Chandler said they wanted to move to the suburbs: “You don't want live in Westchester, that's like the worst of the Chesters”.

It’s a great line, but I personally wouldn’t base my life choices on Phoebe’s advice.

PS I mentioned Phoebe’s line to a NYC dwelling friend, she said Westchester was quite nice.

It's accurate.

Type in 'NYC smells...' and it autocompletes with 'of weed'.
Google AI links multiple references.

https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2023/04/weed-smell-taking-over-new-york/673869/
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/features/2024-04-08/from-nyc-to-amsterdam-the-smell-of-weed-has-critics-fired-up

Dozens of reddit threads discussing it. It's a given. Like London pigeons. The only discussion seems to be if the smell of weed is stronger than the smell of urine.

OP - friends of friends chose Westchester. Last I heard they hike a lot and enjoy living there.

PARTS of NYC smell of weed, that is true. If you didn't feel safe in the whole of NYC, I would suggest that is more about you because I have never particularly felt unsafe here any more than I would do in any other major city. My kids have definitely benefited from growing up with this incredible city on their doorstep.

Parts of NYC smell of weed, yes. Same with MANY other North American cities (Canada can be even worse than the US) as it's legal. Statistically, NYC is very safe and its suburbs generally even more so.

@LMcKenz How’s it going? 😊 Made the move yet? Where did you decide to live?

any updates op did the move go ahead?

Hi, haven’t made the move yet. Husband’s company are being incredibly thorough in making sure the final offer is right for us which is great. We’re doing a recce shortly and I think top 3 for us are Rye, Harrison and Scarsdale. Safety, schools, sense of community and ability to make friends is super important for us. I’m really excited/terrified but think it’ll be a great adventure for us as a family and it’s a good time. Likely will book flights for July so we can have the summer getting set up before my daughter starts school with the new school year. Any advice still very welcome!

Have you looked at Bronxville at all?