We nearly nearly nearly moved abroad and turned it down. Now feeling really low and regretting it- what do we do now?

[4pmwinetimebebeh]

DH was offered a job in the ME- he visited, we even registered the kids for school etc etc but in the end after some careful maths we turned it down. Even with tax free salary with no pension, I wouldn't be able to do my job there etc and cost of living is just so high! But now my algorithm is tormenting me with constant info on how lovely life in Dubai is and I feel we have maybe made a mistake.

We just want a change, we want somewhere with nice weather. I am a HCP (radiographer) and pay in ME is very poor and hours long but really I love my job and would like to work. Husband is an engineer and quite senior.

Where could we go? We need a change! Both age 36, 2 kids age 8 and 5.

Australia?

An engineer who is senior and a radiographer should be able to get a good package in the ME. Maybe check it out again, with a different company offering higher rates of pay?

@CraftyNavySeal yeah we are going to look at Oz its so far though!

@Westfacing he was told the good packages of the past are long gone. Schools are so expensive, accomodation is expensive and wasnt covered. You're right though maybe we should look again.

Look again but yes the golden days are gone.

Unfortunately the days of huge tax free salaries with housing and education included are gone unless you have incredibly niche skills.

I enjoyed a period overseas so i wouldn’t want to put you off but remember that the grass isn’t always greener, costs have gone up hugely worldwide and things that once were better overseas just aren’t always what we are led to believe (eg Australian healthcare woes were in the news last week as in you cannot get some treatments at all on there free system, people remortgaging for fairly routine treatment). No idea about radiography but my dr friend just came back from Australia saying she couldn’t afford to stay in Sydney and elsewhere she experienced issues with racism.

@minnienono Ah thats sad.
The commercialism and 'keeping up with the joneses' really put me off Dubai but lots of ex pats say its not like that so its hard to know isnt it.

Friend's son and family came back from Dubai recently. They found living in the expat community quite claustrophobic along with the expectation that you have a nanny and cleaner who will probably be Filipino. They also mentioned being nervous about driving, because an expat is always guilty if there's a problem and of course, alcohol restrictions. They did stay for nearly 10 years but then came back because they wanted the children to go to an English day school.

I agree that the grass isn't always greener. I have cousins in Australia and it sounds wonderful, though expensive. The new government are pouring money into the health service.

I am a HCP (radiographer) and pay in ME is very poor and hours long but really I love my job and would like to work

The Middle Eastern countries that needed the help of expats to fill roles in order to grow the country have done a really good job of it so the demand for expats isn’t like it used to be - especially in countries that have enough of their own people to be doing the jobs. Dubai is not one of those countries - they have a tiny national population and still depend on expats to a huge extent. Other countries however have enough of their own people and have heavily invested in them so that for eg, 80 percent of the radiographers in the country where I live are Nationals just as 93 percent of nurses are, 70 percent of hospital consultants are nationals in not so many years we won’t need expat medics at all.

Till then expat medical professionals are needed but it’s rare for them to be Westerners, they’re mostly Asian, and they’re excellent.

Honestly, I wouldn’t be looking to find a job as a radiographer if you did make it to the Middle East and as nice as Dubai is there are other places that are nicer in their own right because they’re so different.

Your husband - what kind of Engineer is he? Is it aircraft related?

Did you look at Abu Dhabi? Not as glitzy as Dubai and still expensive but a good lifestyle. Yes, the great packages are no more but you should both make enough to live well and have a new experience. Just check out the 'tax free' issue properly though if you plan to return to the UK. There are lots of conditions to avoiding UK tax when working abroad.

Would there be opportunities in other countries? A friend is working in Singapore and loves it- but its very humid!

Strangely, I'm also a HCP. As a child, I spent 3yrs in the ME (not Dubai), I lived/worked in Sydney for many years as an adult and now live in the UK. We moved tot he ME when I was 8 and my brother was 4. I loved the ME, the opportunity to travel from a different part of the world and also live in a very multi cultural community. My school friends came from all over- Madagascar, Sudan, New Zealand and Britain. I feel it enriched my life so much and my outlook of different cultures.. We rented out our family home, and it was always a plan to move back there- which we did.

I returned to the ME after my degree and some years experience, because I thought I might work there. I found the ex pat community very cliquey! Majority of woman in my profession where there due to their husbands roles, and not to progress their own career. I even went to view/tour 2 hospitals. This was over 20yrs ago now, but they openly said that preferred to employ from countries with cheaper pay rates such as India and the Philippines! They'd only employ someone from say Britain/Aus/USA if they it a very specialised, senior role that couldn't be filled locally. I was early 20's and single, and decided not to pursue it further.

Sydney property is frightfully expensive! Its one of the most expensive cities in the world to live. Wages in Aus are generally more though and a better work/life balance in most fields. I don't know the current job shortage list, but if Aus was on your radar, it might be YOUR job being sponsored and fast tracked for a visa- depending what your DH does? There are cheaper cities in Aus to live in, but work opportunities/schooling/weather would be different to Sydney/Melbourne.

I don't think I've actually helped! Maybe sign up to 'wanted down under' to get a taste or Aus or NZ. Something else might come up, or things change here in the UK and you will be grateful that you didn't move.

Yes, I have a radiographer colleague who has just discovered that moving to Abu Dhabi or Dubai with her DH and DC aged 12 isn’t financially feasible. She’s been told that if she had mammography or breast MRI her chances would be better, but they will otherwise employ cheaper Indians and Filipinos.

The NHS Trust I recently left, the team was full of such staff who’d left the ME because they were fed up of being paid less for the same job, and, of course, couldn’t import their entire family which they can in the UK.

I get the impression the ME seems to be increasingly full of the over confident wide-boys and chancers like London of the 90s.

get the impression the ME seems to be increasingly full of the over confident wide-boys and chancers like London of the 90s

those countries are very much in the minority.

@JDM625 that’s really interesting! I think Australia would be great it’s just such a long way.

@Weepixie hes trained civil and structural but he’s worked in structures/tall buildings for 10 years

Have you thought of Canada? My radiographer friend was looking at it seriously before circumstances changed a few years ago.

@4pmwinetimebebeh you are spot on. Australia is far, in every sense. Far from places and far from people. Our holidays do not align with Europe's, so when you can go and visit during the Australian Summer holidays in December , people at home are busy with school, work, or Christmas with their family. It is dark, cold and wet. In the July holidays, the hurdle is time. The time to flight there and back. The BA evening flight from London will land two days later, for example you leave on the Wednesday evening and you land on Friday morning.

Flight cost has become insane compared to pre Covid. We are lucky we came when DH's job was still offering a flight home per year for the whole family. New staff members don't have this anymore. During school holiday, it is very easy for flights to costa minimum of $3000 per person in economy and we are 5. We used to pay that amount in business years ago, as we fly back home twice a year. One flight paid by work, the other by us.
Domestic flights as well have tripled.

What is really insane is housing. Renting or buying. Or buying fresh food, such as fruits, vegetables, meat, fish, ...

A big issue is health care. I have lived in many countries following DH in his postings. In every one, we had private healthcare. In Australia, even with a diamond-platinum-unicorn plans you can't see a GP, a specialist or have tests done with your privare healthcare. It only caters in-hospital care, say if you are having a surgery. People will argue Medicare covers those but it is not true. I paid $620 for a neurologist visit and I received back from Medicare $84.
Where I live on the Northern Beaches in Sydney, 99% of GPs do not offer free consultations (called bulk billing). My Gp charges $97.00 (Medicare Rebate: $42.85), so I am $54 out of pocket every time. And private health doesn't cover any of this.

Then there is the question what if Australia becomes the forever home for any of you. The thought that I will be back in Europe but my kids might want to stay here is so painful for me. What if you stay and they go.
The ME is 6-7 hours away. Australia is 22+ or more if you have to take a third flight to reach home.
It is hard to be far and away. I miss family and friends. I miss how easy Europe is, how free we are to hop on a cheap Ryanair flight for a weekend in Venice , how longer the holidays feel because you don't have so many hours in a plane and then the jet lag. I miss the culture and art scene.
People will mention sunshine and outdoor, and it puzzles me that people would seek it so far. I am from Monaco, plenty of sunshine and outdoor minus the spiders and snakes!

@Cormoran ah thats interesting that definitley articulates some of my major worries with Aus! But then it has a lot of plusses that the ME doesnt have.

Plenty of plusses compared to ME, but my concluding point was that there is plenty of sunshine closer to home if you look at the South of France, Spain or Italy. When we lived in Barcelona, we could swim in the sea from May till early November and we would ski from December to March in the Pyrenees (France is way better than Andorra but if you have the time, fly to the Dolomites) .

Not if they want nice weather!

Haha
I was about to say this! We're desperately in need of qualified medical professionals. Especially in rural areas.

If only there were some kind of treaty or agreement with European countries that would allow Brits to work and live there