relocating to New York (from UK)

[catcath]

We are going to be relocating to NY over the summer for two years for DH's job. Can anyone recommend a good area to live in? We have two DD's - 5 and 3 so a nice area with good schools is a must, also no more than an hours commute to NYC.
Also any tips for breaking the news to DD's - particularly DD1 who has loads of friends, is very happy and settled and LOVES school but is also a bit of a worrier!
Any info gratefully received as I'm starting to feel a bit overwhelmed by it all aswell...thanks!

Would you be interested in living on Manhattan itself or somewhere more suburban? I know a couple of families living on Manhattan on the Upper West Side and it seems reasonably family friendly - near to Central Park and Riverside Park. I think Connecticut is within commuting distance of NY - also know a family who moved there and like it.

Have you thought about New Jersey, Hoboken is a 10 minute train ride from downtown Manhatten and is v.v.family friendly great schools and loads to do. Even better news is all the taxes you pay are less than if you lived in the city.

We moved from the NY-metro area to the UK in 2004 with a 5yo, 3yo and 8 week old. DD1 will start school and meet many new friends. She will remember her old ones, but kids live in the moment more than adults. You will find mother/toddler groups as well as preschool for DD2. The great thing about moving with the age kids you have is that is it so easy to meet other moms at the preschool and playgroups.

the "bigger" issue is schooling. As DD is probably already in reception or year 1. The US starts school at age 5 with kindergarten (more like reception year). Will the company pay for private school? If not, be careful where you get the house as your only option is to attend local schools.

where is DH job, in Manhatten (what area?)?

Are you interested in living in the city? Would DH agree to commuting?

There are nice areas of West Chester County in NY, Eastern NJ as well as parts of conneticut and Long Island.

email me directly if you want more info...

Thanks for your replies. I think we would prefer to be in the suburbs - used to live in London but moved out when we had a family - don't miss city life at all. DH will be working on Wall Street and is happy to commute up to an hour (as he currently does). We get a monthly allowance from the company but (because of current market conditions and the fact we won't be on a full expat package as we don't have to move) it's not enough to cover private schools. We will have a relocation company helping us with it but it's good to hear from 'real' people! Hoboken sounds good and it has also been suggested we look at Glen Ridge, NJ - anyone know this town?
whitewine - you're right having children this age does make it easier to meet people - I have to keep reminding myself that I did it once before when we moved out of London, I can do it again.

also meant to add that I know that DD's will be fine as they are confident and sociable - it's just the thought of how upset they'll be when we tell them... (or maybe they'll surprise us?)

Hi there...
I've just moved back from New Jersey, we spent 3.5 years there - we lived in South Orange, New Jersey - we had a fantastic time there, I moved with a 2 yr old and a 4yr old - we went to a great montessori school there and then joined the public school system -
we just moved back last month... i'm missing it!(our house in south orange is still available for rent - it's great!)

if you'd like to know more let me know -

Hi, we moved here last summer. Do you have a relocation company to help out as ours were fantastic?

I don't know what your relocation package is like, but Chappaqua is lovely and has quite a few Brits (plus the Clintons ) as the schools are fantastic. It is about 45 mins to Grand central.

Scarsdale has great schools but there are a lot of alpha moms and that put me off a lot. Katonah is gorgeous and you get stacks of property for the same money, but is a lot further from the city.

We looked at Mamoreneck and Rye, which were lovely but didn't have any rental properties when we were looking.

In NJ, Summit is lovely. That is where we nearly went, but we got more house in Westchester (and have 4 kids so needed more house!). I personally didn't like Short Hills, but other people rave about it.

We also considered Manhasset in Long Island but our relocators thought that Brits tend not to settle as well on LI, plus the traffic is pretty bad (although bad traffic here is nothing compared to the UK!!)

I am reasonably new to Mumsnet. I joined ages ago, but haven't really posted, but if I can help at all, feel free to email me.

Where you live depends very much on what you can afford. I lived in Connecticut for 15 months.

Ask on the All those in the US thread - there are lots of MNers in the US and several in the Tri-State area who may be able to help.

Oh, Califrau said the same thing!

Thanks everyone - we are speaking to our relocation agent this evening for the first time so will hopefully get a better idea of what is feasible for us. I may well be contacting some of you again....

Can't believe no-one's mentioned Brooklyn. Some great areas, and can offer a good mix of city/suburb feel. Park Slope very family friendly, as is nearby Windsor Terrace/Kensington, Cobble Hill, Red Hook, Clinton Hill, Brooklyn Hights .
Park Slope and Windsor Terrace are right next to Prospect Park (mini Central Park), a zoo, Audobon Centre, Central Library, tennis court, hospitals, independent shops, great restaurant/night venues, even a fab British Fish and Chip shop.
Admittedly, I am probably now a bit out of date as to where is hot and where's not, as i left 4 years ago, but still have friends in all these neighbourhoods.
Brooklyn rocks, and there are loads of trains to downtown Manhattan (30mins away). Living in NY is such a fun opportunity, I'd suggest throwing yourself into the whole experience and live in the city itself, rather than out in the 'safe' suburbs of Connecticut/NJ etc. (she says, bracing herself for the onslaught of offended suburbanites).

hijack here. We have just arrived in the US (yesterday) on a similar deal, and are currently choosing between Queens or New Jersey. We've had lots of recommendations for Maplewood, which we are checking out this week (dh has already decided on Little Neck as the Queens contender). We are staying in Mountainside for the moment while we find somewhere and it's lovely, very green and open. diddledee where is your place in South Orange (it's twinned with Maplewood isn't it?)? We are doing schools this week so might well be interested if it would fit a family of four (ds and dd are 7 and 8 though so ideally a three bed is what we are looking for if we can afford it).

Nooka, feel free to join us on the All Those... thread (link below)

catcath,

I'm in Flemington, NJ (about 45 minutes outside Manhattan) New Jersey would be a great option for you. Maplewood is really nice with excellent schools. Morris County would also be a good option. I've lived here my whole life (after a short stay in Arizona) and have to say that I wouldn't want to raise my children anywhere else.

catcath,

Thanks for starting this thread - we will be moving to NY at the end of the year for a 3-4 year posting. Our ds2, who will be 7, will come with us. DS1, who's 11, is already in boarding school and, if all goes well, will stay. We have moved every few years since he was born and we want him to have some continuity now that he's getting older.

I will watch with interest, as you will be several months ahead of us.

Hi. Haven't posted for a while as things have been a bit crazy.... Discovered last week we are actually moving in 6 weeks time as opposed to August as we first thought! So it's all systems go renewing passports, getting visas, finding tenants for our house, having a much needed sort out of all our 'stuff' etc, etc We'll be living in corporate housing in Jersey City for the first month, giving us time to decide on area and schools (the thought of house/school hunting with DD's whilst DH is at work is a little daunting...) - have taken note of all the places suggested and am looking forward to checking them out. Thanks so much for all the suggestions. Will be joining the All those... thread very soon....

Nooka
Hope you had a great time checking out Maplewood - yes, the sister town is South Orange, the house we had in South Orange was in the Montrose area which benefits from larger gardens than you will get in Maplewood, there is a great community there too..
let me know if you want the details of my landlord
catcath ... we did the move on very short notice too, i was there within 8 weeks of knowing we were going. We looked at Glen Ridge, but decided on South Orange/ Maplewood as it was a better commute for the city. It worked out very well for us. There's a great 'international' group there.
best of luck, I'm envious!!

Thanks diddledee, we discovered today that the area we thought was Maplewood actually wasn't (which is good because we were really disappointed) and visited the village today which was lovely. Visiting schools tomorrow!

I like Montclair in NJ, worth checking out and it has a fab book store on the high street!

There are some nice towns on the North Shore of Long island - we lived in Great Neck for 3 years (over 20 years ago, I believe it has changed a lot now but we were very happy there and it was almost like an English town, with proper pavements and shops you could walk to) and I commuted in to Wall Street for a few months, which wasn't a bad journey, except when the a/c broke down on the train.

There are fab beaches all along the South Shore too, only about 30 minutes away.

DD1 was born in Manhasset, MdmeS

nooka
if you decide on the area - get in touch with robert northfield at weichert - and ask to see the house on grove road -
marshall school the elementary school is right across the street - for first and second grade, then children go by bus to jefferson school in maplewood from third grade onwards -
there are 3 fantastic 8 yr old children within shouting distance of the house... and a great park just across the street
i was initially cross that we were renting in south orange and not near the 'cuter' downtown of maplewood - but they really are sister towns, and the montrose area is better in so many other ways...
i spoke to my old landlady last night, and she's on the brink of signing a lease... but with students and she's not so keen on that - if you are interested go and check it out...
good luck!

Nooka
I'll be really interested in finding out how things are going for you with house / school hunting etc as it'll be me in a few weeks time! Hope it's all going well. One quick question for you - have the houses you've looked at been furnished or un-furnished? What tends to be more common? We're trying to decide what to ship out and what to store... Thanks! Good luck!

Hi Catcath,
Well we were I'm afraid a bit disappointed with the Maplewood schools, although the area is really lovely. So we are now looking at Queens where we found a fab school (dd actually says she want's to go there ). Re rentals they seem to be unfurnished apart from short stay places. We've shipped most everything in the end, mostly because we want to feel at home at some point!

What else, well the weather is absolutely lovely here, really Summery, and everyone is incredibly nice and friendly. It is spring break now and the children have been adopted by our local neighbourhood (we are staying in Mountainside, NJ) which is great (although I do miss them!).

New Jersey is lovely if you like the suburban life, very green and full of little towns, but it does have lots of big unpleasant roads (we hate the 22 with a passion now, having been shunted last week). I think if you have the cash for a decent sized place then you kids will have a fabtime. We thought that Maplewood was cute (village green!) Milburn classy, Short Hills a bit film set and Summit a bit more down to earth. I think if we hadn't fallen in love with the Little Neck schools Summit is where we'd be looking now.

Hope your relo is going well. It's really nice in the Maplewood-Short Hills area. Most Brits (incl. me) like it here. Can I just point out that Robert Northfield is with Burgdorff-ERA and can be reached at 973-275-3012.
He's awfully good. With almost 700 transactions under his belt he's kinda seen it all, and found a way to make it work!! Cheers!