Living overseas leaving elderly parents

[PinkShore]

I’ve always dreamt of living abroad for a year or two as a family. I think it would be fantastic for our two children, and frankly we met and got married young and I never traveled much before then. I’d love for us all to have that experience.

I work in education, and my husband has a good corporate job in a global company, plus I have citizenship for a country on a different continent due to a parent. So it feels like the opportunities would be there if we wanted to grasp them.

However, my parents (who I am very close to) are on the older side. I’m becoming really aware that in about 5 years they will be in their 80s and I will want and possibly need to be around to help. We live nearby currently. But I guess it’s starting to dawn on me that we may not have the opportunity to live aboard.

Fwiw I have two siblings too. They live about an hour away and generally aren’t as useful as me. Although of course they could step up.

Has anyone made the move abroad while leaving elderly parents at home? How did you navigate it? Any regrets? I guess I’d be interested to hear any stories, comments, thoughts or perspectives.

[Imbringingsaxonback]

I’ve done it. It’s difficult but ultimately I had to put my own life, ability to earn good money and well-being first.

I financially support my parents and couldn’t have done that from the same country they live in.

I always kidded myself that in a crisis I’d be a flight away, and this worked for a time, but Covid lockdowns put an end to that.

They need to be in an assisted living facility now anyway, which I can now afford working overseas.

It’s tricky, but doable. I think it helps they understand their reasonable lifestyle would not be financially viable if I stayed with them.

Teach them how to use technology and apps like Uber long before you leave. Online shopping with home delivery is a godsend.

[TempleOfBloom]

If you are serious about it being for a year or two I would do it now, asap, while they are still able to come out for a visit and also get the benefit of your adventure.

[DaysofHoney]

We did the same, under very similar circumstances to you OP.

No regrets here. I get the guilts occasionally, but my parents come to visit as do my in laws - the time we get then is quality time, and not as childcare!

Be realistic though, that year or two could become 4-5, or more… if you like the lifestyle! Do you have goals to save money abroad too? It can take a year just to break even (relocating can be expensive).