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Living overseas

Whether you're considering emigrating or an expat abroad, you'll find likeminds on this forum.

Anyone in Wellington, NZ? I have questions.

38 replies

JardinsduBasil · 09/10/2022 08:02

After being very sure we would return back to London after this posting next summer, a role has come up in NZ and DP has surprisingly said he would consider moving there. Kids would be 6 and 9 when we moved (eldest has ASD but is great in mainstream with a few accomodations).

I don't want to go through the hassle of bidding if things are not going to suit, so a few questions:

  • weather. Is it really that dreadful? We're somewhere hot now (although too hot to be outside for 3 months of the year) but I'm slightly freaked out by how awful everyone says it is. Does it get you down? I lived in Manchester for a while and am happy with that level of gloom and rain, although it would be a shame to live by the sea and not be able to use it.

-School (we would be using the public system): how did you find kids adapt to it? It looks more topic and skills based (and sporty which would suit DC 2) but am a bit worried about DC1 who loves science. She would also be going back into UK secondary during Year 8 which might have the potential to be disastrous.

Work: DP wants to work again and the terms of our 'visa' would allow this. How likely is an aging public sector librarian to find PT/flexible work? Wellington looks good for public sector jobs?

And this is slightly less specific but....it's really far. We'd be basically saying we would only see family once a year for 3 years which is A LOT (although DP Has close family in Aus which while not THAT close is more achievable for a short visit and we see very little of them currently). I wonder how you get your head round that?

Otherwise it looks family friendly and the public services look great, so any reflections on quality of life welcome!

OP posts:
pattihews · 09/10/2022 16:53

Agree with you about Wellington having character and a sense of history. Unfortunately, having told everyone back in the UK how lovely it was, whenever anyone came out to visit it us it was almost always terrible weather. I lost count of the number of times I walked people along the front to Te Papa in winds and driving rain, promising them that it really was fabulous in good weather.

Echo other people's warnings about many NZ homes seeming very cool to those of us used to central heating. Remember visiting friends with an amazing heritage home in Auckland when we first arrived in NZ. It was mid-November (equivalent of May/ June here) and my friend's husband was in t-shirt and shorts when it was 4 degrees and frosty outside. Draughty single glazing and no insulation. They eventually lit their woodburner when they noticed we were wearing our gloves and coats in the house.

JardinsduBasil · 09/10/2022 20:07

Thanks for all the info everyone. Lots to mull on.

OP posts:
XingMing · 15/10/2022 20:40

We spent a month at Petone, outside Wellington, and liked it but the wind is something else. We went to the beach one day and I was still washing sand and slate out of my hair three days later. And no, we didn't go in the water.

Cormoran · 16/10/2022 02:41

I currently live in Australia but I am Monégasque and wanted to add a comment on the distance from everything and everyone. Going anywhere will cost a fortune. We are on an expat package and have a trip home paid every year. We have always gone twice a year before COVID, so right now , we are paying more than double what we used to pay for our second trip.

It is not only the cost, it is the time it takes. You need more days in your trip. You take the London flight on Monday night and you land on Wednesday morning. Several days of your holidays are wasted on reaching Europe. In January when you go back, family is at work or school, it is dark and cold.

You will be more or less stuck in a corner of the world. When you are in Europe , you can go for a long weekend in Berlin or Lisboa, here where do you go? It takes hours to go anywhere.
All the people commenting on the quality of life have probably never considered that on the shore of the Mediterranean Sea you can have a great quality of life , I might even add a greater quality of life as you can go skiing every weekend in winter and beach life every day in spring and summer, with great food which cost way less, and any art exhibition around you is easily reachable with a cheap flight.

Fresh produce are ridiculously expensive, fresh fish the same. Even if you eat seasonally.

Can't comment on the weather in NZ, but we had a fair share of crappy weather in Sydney as well. For years. House quality is a joke. Never felt so cold. DH is Swedish and in Sweden, indoors you live in t-shirt in winter, even when you have a meter of snow outside. Many times I go to someone's house for bookclub or coffee, and more than once, I have kept my coat on. And three years of La Niña ! Australia under water is no fun at all.

On the education front, I find the school curriculum like Swiss cheese compared to the French system. We complement the learning at home. Kids are in the extension classes, but even those are seriously thin on content and challenge. I don't mind doing extra stuff with them because I believe education doesn't happen at school only. Geography knowledge is by far the worst. History follows no specific order and is more a deep dive into a topic that a chronological order. Nothing pre-roman, so Mesopotamia, the birth of writing, even the different pre-historical Homos . Scary. Shakespeare is done every single year in High School, which I find very odd because in France, every school year is a century, so you do all the authors, poets and play writer of that century. You wouldn't do Molière again and again and again.

It is very safe and friendly. Nobody is going to steal my bag at the beach if I go for a swim, which you can't do in Italy, France, Spain, .... During the bushfires , my neighbours came to educate me on fire plan, and everyone says hello and how are you. However it is a very lonely place and I found it hard to make friends.

I admit, I am homesick, more so now than I was in the early years. In my experience, having lived through posting in several countries, it is the people that make a move successful. The connections, the friends, doing stuff with someone, a beautiful beach and view do not really matter after a while.

Rainbowqueeen · 16/10/2022 03:07

As far as the distance back to the UK is concerned - would your uk family be willing to meet part way? I’m thinking Singapore,Malaysia even the US? That way you could see them more often.

I absolutely adore Wellington as a city. Yes it is windy but choose your house carefully. It’s not super cold or super hot so easy to have a nice lifestyle.

Cormoran · 16/10/2022 03:29

I wish MN had an edit or delete button, because I realise my post was very negative , so I will try to formulate better why the distance is the killer that makes it hard.

You miss up on so many things in your friends and family's life. The weddings, the births, graduations , even divorce parties . You can''t go to each. Meet-ups, reunions, girls weekends. A concert you would like to see.... important things and stupid things.

It is the time and the money that come with the distance, and NZ is even worse.

When you do go back, half the holidays is spent visiting the two sets of family who you miss dearly, so you don't really have much time left to show the world to the kids. I would love to take them to Canada or do the Aztec ruins in Mexico, but then we don't see the family, and the ageing gran-parents and all the cousins who really look forward to do mischiefs with their Australian cousins, especially after the two years in which the borders were shut and nobody could get out of Australia. This seriously affected my feeling towards Australia. Not being able to leave.

Family and friend will maybe visit you but most probably not for the same reasons. Money and time. Nobody comes here for a week or two. During the European summer holidays, kids are at school here and it is cold. During our summer holidays, they don't have that many days as European kids go back to school around the 5-6 January.

It is tricky. Do you gain or do you lose? We all have different circumstances, so you have to look at the move from every angle.

pattihews · 16/10/2022 09:58

The OP is talking about a fixed-term contract, Cormoran. So if it doesn't suit there are only a couple of years to manage. And Wellington has a lot more to offer than most other New Zealand or Australian cities. Some culture, some intellectual life, music and decent bars and restaurants. As someone who lived in London for much of my life I found enough to do/ see/ be involved in to suffice.

WahineToa · 16/10/2022 10:07

Yeah Wellington is a very busy little place, it’s got all kinds of things going on.

whoareyouinviting · 16/10/2022 19:12

I agree with many comments here. The weather is windy and the houses can be cold BUT it's a fabulous little city. It's compact and easy to get around, the cafe/restaurant culture is excellent, the city has different parts to it each with their own vibe - the waterfront is lovely. I lived there in my early 20's but I'm now in the UK. Go there as it really is great there.

JardinsduBasil · 16/10/2022 21:21

Just noticed a few more posts. @Cormoran sorry you're having a rubbish time. We are in fact on the shores of the mediterranean now (although not in Europe) so it is cheap (ish) and quick to get home - honestly though we've been here during covid and I'm not that bothered about the regular visits. All of our good friends are very taken up with young families and work so we don't really feel we're missing out socially being away. But yes it makes things like weddings unworkable.

@Rainbowqueeen probably yes. DP also has close family in Australia, who we see very infrequently, so they would be closer too (obvs not super close).

I think it boils down to whether we repat and have some stability for the kids or go on another adventure- DP leaning towards stability at the moment- as Wellington sounds fab, if damp and windy.

OP posts:
elmooie · 11/11/2022 19:15

A bit late to this, but if you haven’t made a decision yet OP, I would urge you to do it if your housing costs will be covered. It’s such a beautiful friendly little city - the winters certainly aren’t worse than Manchester and the summers are a lot better. My In-laws live there (Eastbourne) and adore the lifestyle- v happy with the local school too which goes all the way from 5 to 12/3 or Reception to Year 8). As a Kiwi currently living in the UK - the schools are so much free-er and less rules bound than the UK, while still managing to provide a decent education. Kids are less stressed for sure.

HairyMcLarie · 11/11/2022 19:39

pattihews · 09/10/2022 16:53

Agree with you about Wellington having character and a sense of history. Unfortunately, having told everyone back in the UK how lovely it was, whenever anyone came out to visit it us it was almost always terrible weather. I lost count of the number of times I walked people along the front to Te Papa in winds and driving rain, promising them that it really was fabulous in good weather.

Echo other people's warnings about many NZ homes seeming very cool to those of us used to central heating. Remember visiting friends with an amazing heritage home in Auckland when we first arrived in NZ. It was mid-November (equivalent of May/ June here) and my friend's husband was in t-shirt and shorts when it was 4 degrees and frosty outside. Draughty single glazing and no insulation. They eventually lit their woodburner when they noticed we were wearing our gloves and coats in the house.

I'm in Auckland and although I agree with you about the draughty houses (we have a 100 year old villa) the chances of it being 4c and frosty in November is zero! July/August yes on very very rare occasions (and it would make the news if it did in mid winter)

It's currently 22c day time and 17 overnight! Yesterday we had a cold front sweep through and it dropped to 16c in the day.

buswheels · 16/11/2022 11:41

I’m in Wellington now don’t do it. It is a shitty dump going rapidly downhill. (Everyone knows this John Key described it as a failing city in 2016 and it has only got worse, someone recently tried to win the election (as mayor) based on how backwards the city has gone in the last few years!)

Kiwis love Wellington and will wax lyrical about it until the cows come home, in the 90’s yes it was arty and vaguely progressive in a 50’s way and had a few things going for it. Since then it has basically been regressing at ever increasing pace.

what things stand out?

there was an earthquake in 2016 it savaged the central city, most of our civic buildings are closed there seem to be no plans in place to reopen them.

you say dh is a librarian, our central library is shut and has been since 2016 (again no plans to reopen) yes lots of public sector jobs but also lots of people to fill them

here in Wellington we regularly have shit hosing down the streets in the central city this is due to delayed upkeep (and probably the 2016 earthquake) it’s not confined to the central city, I drive past 3 raging water leaks on my way to the local shop and have been going past them for months. There was a leak round the corner that went on for years. Nothing is fixed or repaired. Don’t get me wrong it’s not Christchurch, there’s no billions being pumped into repairing things. the damage is much more relentless, hidden, slow to be uncovered.

the weather is crap and everyone is miserable

we’re earning less now than we were in 2018 yet working longer hours.

the health service is dreadful, people have to pay for a lot (GP visits) there are several well publicised cases recently where people are waiting for 2 days in A & E then walking out and literally dropping dead, thankfully we’ve only been to A&E a handful of times but every single time the diagnosis was missed!

education well some of the time school is fun for the kids and they would have a nice relaxing time but would be seriously behind going back into any decent education system, my youngest is apparently gifted at maths, I reckon she’s about 2 years behind the UK level. Your oldest would likely get no support at school you might be allowed to fund it yourself. A work colleague recently told me her daughter is severely dyslexic and can’t read (aged 12) school has recently stopped requiring her to read during the day because the teacher can’t provide any support. Nearly the end of the school, year here but I don’t think there’s any reason to assume she’s suddenly going to teach herself to read over the summer. Science I think my kid has been doing the lifecycle of the flax bush in science. For a term. To my knowledge he has never done an actual experiment. They did watch a video of someone dissecting an eye does that count? Education seems to have had a lot of government directives recently which teachers are struggling to accommodate. Shakespeare has recently been cancelled as has latin, yes I do mean on a national scale.

if you come from Levin (Wisbech without the high IQ of the population) Wellington feels like an epicentre of culture and an edgy metropolis. To the rest of us, well, we mostly conclude I’m being unfair to Wisbech.

(To those who ask why we don’t leave well we we had it all planned out precovid then we got trapped, we’re back to working on it again!)

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