DH interested in moving to SPAIN. Can you guys help me with some questions please?

[LadyOfTheHollyAndTheIvy]

Firstly, does your credit rating from here go with you?
Do you think it is wrong to take my kids to Spain, they are 1 and 2, and make them live in Spain ie. make the decision for them to live in another country.
Obviously they are only english speaking.
Would I still be able to be a SAHM or do you think I would have to work ie: I would not get my tax credits/child benefits which just about allow me to stay home.

Or even better, has anyone done it? Gone to Spain to live I mean, with kiddies.

I have always been cr*p with languages... English is my fourth one, so I have contaminated it with everything else!

Oh, now I feel embarrased, I only speak two...English was my first but now is no better than my Spanish. Am now very curious - where are you from originally?

Morning!

Best of Britain:
Veggie food and yummy chocolate
Reasonable benefits
24 hour supermarkets
Organic products
M & T/music groups/tumble tots and the like
Some excellent schools
Libraries

Worst:
Expensive housing
Council tax
Expensive to go out
Schools can be a total lottery
Over examining
Longest working hours in Europe
Competitive parenting

This is going to stick with me all day, isn't it ? Know what you mean, MeMySonAndI, distance between you and ex-ils is a definite bonus. If you ever want Spanish stuff for your son, please feel free to shout.

Be back later - know I will; I find these sorts of lists addictive.

Hmm...

Best of Britain:
Veggie food and yummy chocolate - we cook our own and there are all types of choc

Reasonable benefits - true, almost no benefits here

24 hour supermarkets - here too

Organic products - here too, we get a box every week and there are health food shops

M & T/music groups/tumble tots and the like - nothing here

Some excellent schools - good nurseries here but after that too much testing and parrot learning and not enough creativity or imagination. There are a couple of good private schools here but very difficult to get in and expensive

Libraries - plenty of libraries but the lowest number of books read per year per head in Europe

Worst:
Expensive housing - prices have gone up a lot here, people can't afford to leave home till mid-30's. When we've finished borrowing from the bank to do up our small house our mortgage will be about 1000 pounds a month
Council tax - don't have that but plenty of other taxes
Expensive to go out - still cheaper than the UK but going up
Schools can be a total lottery - the teacher you get is a lottery anywhere
Over examining- same here
Longest working hours in Europe - i thought that was Spain?
Competitive parenting - not yet but i'm sure it's coming

I'll try and post my own list later...

Worst:
Tv licence
Weather
Expensive and unreliable public transport
Traffic

Best:
Some decent tv
Not as many ads
Cbeebies
Broadband at a reasonable price - telefonica is extortionate
Quorn sausages and Green and Blacks - the only things I miss and ribena, maybe.
Weetabix - I did say I live in the quinta ostia, didn't I?

Off to food shop - boys home tomorrow - yee ha !

DH could get transferred to a garage in Spain as he is a technician for a major car manufacturer who he says has garages/showrooms in Spain.
He earns here the equivalent of over 2000 euro. I assume he would be paid the same in Spain? That would be too easy/convenient?
Being a SAHM is important to both DH and me, it is what we both wanted/want for the kids.
We want to live out in the sticks/rurally rather than in the town.
I am worried about how we would get a mortgage if our rating here is a bit shite? That is what worries me most.

Your comments on the above please.

I doubt he'd be paid British rates, unless he is offering something they can't get here. You'd really need to check that out.

Where would you be based? Prices vary immensely. I have friends renting a lovely three bed flat for 450 euros a month, bills on top. Flats here start at 85,000 euros and upwards - but I think I live in the cheapest part of Spain.

Our bank gave us a mortgage with no income to speak of - how's that? They knew there was equity in the property, work was pending and they went out on a limb. If your DH has a permanent contract - contracto indefinido - he will get 14 pays (double pay at summer and Christmas) and the bank will base your ability to have a mortgage, largely on that. If they only give him a temporary contract, you are more likely to have problems.

Like we've all said, M&T etc largely doesn't exist. Children start school very early - at 3 - but this is not compulsory. Actually, doing the full day isn't either and my youngest only does it occasionally. Nurseries are heavily subsidised - we actually got free places.

Don't forget if you are going to live rurally, you'll probably need two vehicles, otherwise you will be very isolated.

Have I raised more questions than I answered?

I don't 'do' M&T anyway tbh so am not worried about that type of thing. DS1 going to school early is not a problem either as he gets thoroughly bored at home with me anyway. I am looking to enrol him in a school here with a nursery jobby so he can go once he is 3.

DHs' 'rents live in Almeria.
I have had a ganders at some places on tinternet there up for sale and they seem quite reasonably priced.
The prices of some are the same as we have a mortgage on here for 50% of our tiny 2 bed. (Shared ownership- will never be able to buy the rest)
Are you in a rural area 1066?

Your inlaws live in Almeria? It would be a definate advantage to have some relies nearby.
I once worked out I'd have to earn double what I earn here just to cover the basics if i lived in the UK so you must check out how much pay your DP would be on.

You may not do the M+T groups now but when you're living in a Spanish village (most of the people who live there will have been there for centuries and it'll be much more difficut to integrate than on the coast for example, where there are lots of foreigners), don't speak the language, your DP is out all day and you know no-one you may wish you had the option...

Not trying to put you off but Spain is not the UK with better weather. Could you go out for a month and check it out or do you already know the area you want to move to?

Yes - the middle of nowhere, really. I'm inland, in a tiny village, ten minutes from the coast and five from my local little town. I love it but I also loved where I lived in the UK - Suffolk/Essex.

SM is right. I was actually thinking about asking you if you'd moved much in the UK. It always takes 3 years to rebuild a social network and sometimes it JUST doesn't happen.

It is a very good idea to go and visit. Do your in-laws speak Spanish? Are they nice people i.e. would make you welcome, share their friends until you make your own?

If, you don't do M&T, how do you like to relax, yourself? I'm not interrogating you, honest , just trying to work out if you could easily find an alternative here.

It can happen - I sort of know a lady, 20 minutes away, who arrived with no Spanish and they seem very happy. They do have satellite tv, though.

satellite tv is not a replacement for interaction with other humanoids...

DH have what many people consider an unhealthy marriage, ie: neither of us have many friends, but only because they don't have kids and have simply given up even asking us out and about as sometimes we cannot get my mum to babysit.
Forgot to say, if we do go, I will be taking my mother with me which DH is happy with so will not be totally alone, but yes, will be alone for most of the day.
We are generally very happy with eachother's company.
DH does the occaisional fishing trip or karting day with his bro and I like to sew and bake.
We do go out as often as we can on the town for a meal or a vino or 3.
I like to walk the dogs on my own, that is me time I really enjoy and soaking in the bath, alone, without kids, when I get the odd chance. I also like to grow veg and garden.
I sound well old and am only 24! LOL

PIL do not speak spanish but are trying to pick it up. They have not been out there long.

Wouldn't know about that, SM, I'd imagine there are some humanoids totally outclassed by satellite tv . I think they got it because initially, none of them spoke any Spanish and none of the locals spoke much/any Spanish.

Lady - keep bumping this - you need to get the attention of Lucy5: she lives down south and should be able to give you more localised advice. That or put a new thread with the exact location in the living overseas section.

Actually, given your interests you'd be fine - as long as you move to a welcoming community. The only drawback I'd see is your DH might have a long day - but in that case, he should get a decent lunch break.

I also know loads of cases of people who adapted really well but usually, they were only here temporarily. SM has hit the nail on the head - it'll be a success if you research it and are not expecting to live your UK life here.

I was always known to enjoy my own time and have my own space. Yet I found that I enjoyed to have that while I was surounded by people I knew well. It is not the same to do it because you enjoy it as because the situation has been "enforced" on you.

I have lived in 5 different countries and in different cities and villages within them. As a rule, the most culturally diverse the area is, the most likely you would be able to fit in as a foreigner.

I stand in awe when I see those TV programs with people buying a goats shed in the middle of nowhere wishing to start a new life overthere. They would be cut out of everything (and after 3 months any place is as boring as the current place), they would have absolutely nothing in common with the locals that at the beginning may look even cutely strange but who would be impossible to accept in the future (particularly when they place a good emphasis in showing you are not acceptable to them no matter how hard you try!).

When I first arrived to Spain I had a great time, as I found a very culturally diverse group in my classmates, we had a great time. It only downed on me how little welcome we were when they moved back to their places and I no longer was in the protected environment of the group. May I also mention that many of those classmates were Spanish themselves? but they also found it difficult to function within the place own rules. Which would be the same if you have born and breed in a remote British island and moved to the City (or visceversa!).

The point is... try to make it easy for yourself. Don't stretch the things too much, because living abroad will bring their own stresses, and things that seem perectly easy to do here may become too dificult when far away

Should have said that the locals here don't speak much/any "English" and even less so, the more rural you are.

MeMySonandI is right that finding a community that is open to newcomers is quite unusual but equally, you have the get-out-of-jail-card also known as children. I already know that I will always be "la inglesa" here - but my lovely neighbours always preface everything with, "Well, we've only been here 10 years." These are the people, who invited me to theirs for NYE, without really knowing me, but the idea of my being on my own was unacceptable to them.

How are your in-laws doing with the language? What took them out there? Would you live near them? How well did you do with a language at school? How do you envisage coping going to the doctors, the chemists, the school?

Don't panic - you can do it but you have to have the right character - be prepared to give it a go; be prepared to get it all wrong; be prepared that even going shopping can be hard work. It will take at least a year for you to understand what is going on and a second one to be able to, more or less, interact as you'd like.

I spoke good Spanish before I arrived here and had lived elsewhere in Spain and it was still hard.

To finish on a good note: I have never seen such stars or rainbows before. I like the fact everyone says, "hello" and this includes the teenagers. I love the fact my kids' school goes from 3 to 12 and the big ones expect to help out and look out for the littles.

Good advice from 1066 and MeMy.

1066 - I rarely see rainbows down here but that's because it hardly ever rains! Isn't Galicia a bit like Scotland in fact, what with the 'gaita' (Galician bagpipes) and all?

What I really miss are the fantastic cloud formations you get in the UK. And the way they race aross the sky. Empty blue skies can become monotonous...

I know where you're coming from SM - I was in Madrid, many years ago, and missed exactly that, being from Liverpool, originally.

Galicia is very similar to Wales/Scotland but the weather is tons better. Mind you, the locals say it has changed loads. I've never seen such low lying cloud either, nor so many wind turbines - I'm a fan, much prettier than electricity pylons .

Oh well, being raised in the middle of a dessert (it only rained twice a year and only for a few minutes!)so I moved here because of the lovely weather. Now... I'm getting a bit tired of it

been

Never move because of the weather - one of the reasons I happily headed towards Essex, originally, was because it was said to be one of the driest parts of the country - they were lying. I still remember sweeping water away from one front door, in torrential rain.

Oh well, the weather was one of the factors, although the other ones had a bigger weight in the decission

That'll be a man or work, then !

I live in Seville and have done for 8 years. I would say to be prepared to live a different life. It is NOT Britain with better weather. It is great in many ways and SHIT in others. Also weather wise, rememeber that houses in Andalucia are generally not centrally heated and it's COLD in winter with no heating. It's an extreme climate down here, cold in winter and totally saharan in summer. If you can't learn a decent amount of Spanish, forget it.

That said, there are great things about it, can you come and spend a bit of time here and see what it's really like? You'll need maybe as much as 2 years to settle and may find it hard to adjust. The first year is all novelty and organising and the second can be a shock to the system and getting used to the fact that this is your home now, forever.

Would second the pay issue. If Dh is earning less than 2000 euros a month you'll struggle and credit/mortgages etc will be hard without a fijo/indefinido (long term)contract. Even if you enjoy your own company it's easier if you move to an area where you at least have the possibility of meeting people.