Moving back to Australia?

[BacktoOz]

We spent 18 months there, coming back a year ago for DS1 to get into Secondary school. It's wonderful to be near family again, DD1 got into a top school and loves it, DD2 is on course to follow her. But we all miss our sunny life back there so much. DH has started looking for jobs back there, I'm looking at schools and the only reason not to go is that it seems so flaky; that and it would break my parents' hearts. They couldn't get out there last time. In theory they are now free to travel, but realistically, how would it work that we'd see much of them at all? Looking at other websites, this one seems to have more transcontinental posters. Please help!!

Our family is scattered all over the world and we decided to move near Melbourne. It has been great. We still see a lot of everyone because we all make an effort to meet up somewhere. School holidays in Oz are generous and there is flexibility within the schools for extended holidays so it really does work for us.Because the grandparents stay with us and also come with the intention of being with us I think in many ways we have a really solid bond with them all. Good luck with your decision.

Thankyou tilbatilba! We really had no choice in coming back- husband's work, sponsored visas, and as the children are getting older we really feel we can't chop and change again. If we go it'll have to be for good. Does anyone have any advice on schools?? The most appealing school isn't in the suburb we were in before. We loved the laid back attitude before, but DS has leapt ahead accademically. Will we be being irresponsible in taking him back to a happier less stressed but not so high flying future? I'm being very needy as close advisees here are too involved, or haven't been told!

Any advice on schools/ upheaval?

Can;t help you BacktoOz - we're moving ourselves next year (cross fingers) but ds too little for school yet!

But I wanted to say, my sister married a Brit and his parents get out there pretty frequently - maybe once a year iirc? His sister and brother and best friend have been too in past couple of years. Think they are enjoying it - they get a warm holiday with family!

Why would your DS have a less 'high flying' life here in Oz? Surely all of the other positives of this country would out weight that extremely minor point. There are high flyers here too if that is important for you.

I wouldn't worry about seeming flaky either -very unimportant. Do what is best for you and your family.

so you are worried that Australia is far less rigorous than other countries as far as acadmeia - well having taught high school both here in Aus and in the UK - I would say that the qld system ( in which I taught) is a far better system in terms of holistic approach to education and learning - far more independent thought and learning happening than in the UK where it seems to be a great dependence on learning the 'appropriate' information in order to do well on a SATS test or at GCSE or A- level.

Not a lot of scope for independent thought and far less facilities for students who may not be so academic but would do very well in terms of training for trades, hopsitality, business etc - all of which are available post compulsory here in QLd at least.

I found it very stressful to teach or try and teach children and prepare them for exams in the UK than I did with a great scope of assessment that was available here to me in Qld.

I think Australia has produced a lot of high flyers and great independent thinkers as well as great designs, advances in science and technology.

As to your son's progress - as it did in the UK - the attitude to schooling and academia needs to come from home - the valuing of education is present despite the fact it appears that us Aussies seem to laud sport above all else.

But if you are concerned and think your son will go backwards by coming here then you need to weigh carefully the lifestyle and quality of life against that.

I moved back to Oz after only 20months living in Germany when the plan originally was 3-5years - thereby risking the 'flaky' label and disappointing DH's family, but it has definitely all been for the best. We are just much happier here.

In regard of education Australia performs really well on the OECD Pisa study, with only nerdy countries like finland and south korea doing better in some cases. Germany is working really hard at catching up (I know because my sister-in-law is working on a project as part of her PHD).

Kids are resilient above all else!

Regarding family we take annual turns at going back and bringing the in-laws out. I know plenty of people with exactly the same schedule - or even more often depending on their disposable income.

I know plenty of expats who have 'gone back home' only to end up back here in short order, or after a long agonising time trying to get back via work/visa considerations. All I can say is do it while you are still 'young and marketable' as it only gets harder the older you get. Good luck, Sim

I'm surprised your kids aren't pushing to return! I am biased but what's not to love about Australia? Don't live your life to suit your parents. You will have regrets if you come (speaking from family experience) but think of the regrets you'll have if you don't. Mosquitoes are worth tolerating!I also agree, when you're older you may not be as able to make the change. I was going to add that my boy could be a high flyer here if he wanted to, but he's currently sitting happily with his fingers caught in the cupboard for the millionth time this week so maybe someone else can argue that point

We've just moved to Sydney with our three kids (14, 9 and 4). Life is SO much better here - DH isn't working silly hours with a four hour commute on top so we actually have a family life, the kids love it, eating out is cheap, lots of outdoor stuff to do, we have a swimming pool - I could go on! We did pull our eldest from the local high school after 7 weeks as they had a crap attitude to his dyslxia. He is now in a private school which doesn't cost the earth; he's doing really well and he loves it. Personally I wanted a school that encourages kids to do their best and has high expectations of behaviour rather than one that was only interested in how many kids go on to university, but if you want pushy academic there are plenty of those around here too

I don't have experience of going and coming back, but I do know what a difference it has made that we have skype/webcam and my parents do to. They live o/seas and have done for 13 years. They are distraught that we are going to Oz, but at least my dad understands that they did the same thing - thought about what they needed to do to be happy for the rest of their lives...

They have seen their only grandchild a princely 5 times since he was born over 2 years ago, but hundreds of times on webcam...

The one thing about going back again I would have thought, is that it shows you really mean it. Then they might consider coming out for an extended period - if you have room they could come for a 6 week stay (if you can all cope with that!), and then if that goes well maybe longer another time.

Good luck, it's the part I'm dreading most about going I think.

Thank you so much for your replies. Lispy-the kids are indeed pushing to go back. The bit about high flying sounds really snotty, sorry. In Oz DS was very popular with classmates and teachers, but was really dreamy and, well, a bit thick. Since we've been back he's soared academically in a tiny and very competitive class. Eidsvold- you're right, he really goes with flow and I'm sure he'll do well wherever. Sunnydelight- do you mind my asking about schools? When we were there before we were very happy with the local public one, but as they've all spurted a bit whilst back and as they are out of year in Oz (young in the year) we will probably go private. Do you know anything about the Catholic one with nice views or the co-ed on Military Road? AussieSim- thank you for your good luck, I think we're going to go for it!

sunnyd - Hi! Where have you ended up? And what schools (be cryptic if you like)
Glad you are loving it!

Backtooz - I gather you are talking Military Road Mosman? So that would be mosman high? And the school with the nice views would be Shore at North Sydney perhaps?

Mosman High had quite a good reputation (a few years ago when I was around) and then before that quite a bad one (for bad behaviour and not-great results). More recently I think it is quite good - especially at dram and art, but with good results across the other subjects as well. It quite an arty school - no uniform - and a state gvernment school.

Shore is a private boys school. Very expensive, its a Cof E school. I know lots of men ho were shore boys - most them are lovely. On the whole I think its a good school with the same downfalls you will find at any private boys school. If you are not well off financially and are not good at sport, I expect it would be a struggle. If you are one of those things, it would probably be a good place to be.

I thought you meant the Jesuit school - St Aloysius ?? sp? which has amazing views of the harbour. If not, not to worry, otherwise, extremely specific kind of education which you have to be happy with, from what I understand

If you are looking at the Northern Beaches and you might consider St Lukes at Dee Why (CoE) or St Augustines Brookvale(Catholic). There is Manly Selective Campus too if your boy is bright and passes the tests - which I think is a fab option for very keen students. In Manly there is also St Pauls - fantastic position on the headland at Manly. Plenty of options. I am taking a bit of a different/alternative option and my boys will be going to Glenaeon - the main campus is a Middle Cove - an amazing location. If you check on the schools with the best HSC results they are most often the State selective schools actually - this link may be useful.

I don't think we'd qualify for the selective schools, at least initially as they are only open to residents. We did notice when we were there last that the excellent public school they attended shrank dramatically in the older years as pupils were creamed off to the G&T programs and private schools. For that reason we're looking at private schools where they could all go, at least until DS goes to senior school. The ones we are considering, as my cryptic clues were too cryptic, are Kincoppal Rose Bay, which looks lovely and SCEGGS Redlands in Mosman. The advantage of the latter is that we know and love the area; Vaucluse is lovely too! I don't want to move back there and subject the DCs to a long commute as one of the reasons for upping sticks is to get out of the hours in the car each day, living not near school. Thank you VERY much everyone for your input. It really is helpful!

I would just say briefly that Sydney is one of the most expensive cities in the world and Mosman is the most expensive suburb in Sydney and Vaucluse would not be far behind it ... Both beautiful areas to be sure to be sure and if money is no object then Yippee!! but Sydney is full of water front suburbs from Palm Beach through to Cronulla and not forgetting the inner suburbs that are on the water like Hunters Hill and Drummoyne.

My view of schools is to figure out what your families values are and what school will send consist message on values to your child.

If you check out the recent drama at Knox - a very expensive private school with an impressive old boy list - you will read about the kind of experiences that can be had within their hallowed halls ... I had a boyfriend for many years who went to Scots College at Bellevue Hill through his entire high school experience and it was terrible for his self-esteem and for giving him a skewed view of the world, which is mother admitted to me in hindsight had been a big mistake.

Sorry if my input is annoying or makes your decision harder, but it is done with best intentions ...

Hi Astrophe We ended up in St. Ives, ironically mainly because of St. Ives High which is the school we pulled DS1 from. He is now At Northern Beaches Christian up at Terrey Hills, and I'm hoping all three of mine will be there by next year (am waiting on a place to become free for DS2). The idea of having all of them in the same place is very appealing at the moment, as is the notion of not having to change the younger two when they reach high school age. I feel like I have done enough school selection to last me a lifetime. When are you heading back this way? (I think my CAT subscription is still valid if you want to e-mail me).

ha sunny, thats great that you have found a school you are happy with. We have friends who teach at NB Christian! It sounds like a lovely place, although I don't know too much about it. It will be on our list when the dc get to that age though. I don't have cat its on my to-do list...but email me at katisrael at gmail dot com

We are leaving uk next July, travelling, then back to my folks (neutral bay) in Oct/Nov.