Dubai with kids-following dh out

[oscarandelliesdad]

Hi everyone,
Looking for for practical advice and/or a head wobble from people living out in Dubai already. Dh was told his job was moving to Dubai in December but didn't really get lots more information than that. He was told that there would be a small paybump but as the office in the UK was closing, we didn't feel like we had any choice but to wave him off.
The dc and I are used to rubbing along together without dh but we do miss him.... He was told last week that they will in fact be shifting him to a family contract with schools /flights/visas /medical /housing and car allowance. He hasn't been out there long enough to get a real feel for life yet but we are looking for advice on areas that are good for families but not too expensive, which schools are welcoming and whether it would be feasible for my ds (14)to transfer relatively painlessly from the Scottish system to an international one. My little two are still in primary, so fairly portable
I am just a bit at sea with it all and we obviously can't just nip over for a look at the moment.... I am worried about whether it is the right move for us all and what it feels like to live there day to day. The kids and I run to scruffy ( although we could up our game a bit on that front ) and like pootling in parks and forests, don't want to feel horribly out of place constantly! Would that kind of lifestyle be achievable out there? Sorry, that is all a bit of a brain dump! But just anyone with dc living out there, I would love to hear about how life is for you.
Areas we are looking at are Arabian ranches, jumeirah village and um suquim. Are there any other spots that are good and perhaps a little more affordable? Thanks very much to anyone that has waded through..

I think (happy to be corrected) that your feminism can quietly influence your family and colleagues if you go.
After all, not every moment of our life is Women’s rights, is it? Every culture has its problems: we have bumbling Boris and jobs for his chums, the great hope of Biden and Harris have just sacrificed a load of women’s right at the altar of trans ideology... the schools are definitely international and forward looking...

We've lived in various countries including a year in Dubai.

120 000 AED won't get you anything in AR, not even a 2 bed in Al Reem but will get you a 4 bed in JVC.

Would the 14 year old be British curriculum Y9 or 10 currently? (i.e. would have already started GCSE's or due to start in Sep). 18 months ago a friend moved from another British school internationally to Dubai - DD was between Y10 & 11 and they couldn't find a British school who would accept her half way through (a good thing in my opinion as it's really tough on kids who change schools half way through GCSE's)

Also from a school perspective most people have to apply to several schools in order to secure a place. They charge for that and it can mount up so see if the company will cover it. Lots of school also operate a debenture scheme either company or private so you that is also a consideration from both a can I get a place and cost perspective.

From a Uni perspective in England the only way to guarantee Home Status is to live in the UK for the 3 years before uni so sending kids back to board for 6th form is no guarantee. Not sure how these rules differ in Scotland. Many people with kids who are educated internationally still get home status but there are no guarantees without the 3 year residency.

In terms of food shopping there is a huge range of options. You can eat well for a reasonable price as long as you don't expect to shop at Waitrose every week and buy exactly what you bought at home. Most UK foods/brands are available at a price and its just a case of buying the few things you really can't live without rather than everything available.

The current covid situation is going to make seeing each other if you don't move incredibly difficult and I think it's going to get worse before it gets better. The new variants which have cropped up show how things can change extremely quickly even a year into a global pandemic. The differing speeds and availability of vaccines in different countries is going to make things harder travel wise. It's impossible to plan anything into the future at the moment and personally I think it will be that way for another year with border restrictions one way or another, travel quarantine etc etc.

@Flippy87

I think you should go for it, but maybe plan to send DS back to UK for a levels?

Why? OP is Scottish. Your ignorance is showing...

I have a lot of friends who moved to Dubai and have stayed there for many years. They all love it and say life is easier there but they do complain about the hot summers.
I think given the Corona situation in U.K. this is a fantastic opportunity for you to get out! Vaccination rates are high and people actually still have a life. For that alone, I would be very excited. To be honest, I have seen a fair few young successful people trying to leave the U.K. now and places like Dubai know it.

We've been in Dubai many years and have loved our time here.
Join Facebook groups

Brits in Dubai
and
British Mums Dubai
and
British Expats Dubai.
They will all help you with information.
Life can be very normal here and is for the majority of expats. But sunshine, experiences, diversity and opportunities enhance day to day life.

@olivehater, thanks for sharing that perspective. I suppose I am quietly worried that this is his third stint living abroad and if we choose to continue apart for another 5 years it will really stretch us as a family - especially with Covid creating more restrictions on visiting each other. I just don't want to mess up Ds's prospects for not paying exorbitant international student fees at uni. The dc are ambivalent about moving, they don't get to see family and friends anyway for the last year and are indeed missing dh more than when they were teeny.
I am thinking I will call big Ds's school on Monday and see if I can speak to a Depute about how different the systems really are once you are out of Primary (where I swim). He has started working on his Nat5 course and sitting three sciences, history etc, although in the same boat as everyone with Google classroom. (the little two are in hub with me when I'm in teaching - a bit miserable as for everyone).
Thanks again everyone for offering perspectives and information.

In terms of Uni fees, it makes a difference if your DH is on a temporary contract and can send that contract to the Uni as evidence when you fill in the fee assessment forms.

It also makes a difference if you keep a house in the U.K. while you're away. It's all about showing that the move was never intended as a permanent thing and the U.K. was still your 'home'.

@newname2021, I wish there were a like button on mumsnet. That is great info to have aswell. We will definitely be keeping our wee house here, car etc and to all kind enough to reply.

Another middle aged scottish radical feminist here. Live in Abu Dhabi though. I agree with Heinz. Lots of normal people who really dislike the flashiness and actively avoid it.

That is great to hear, @ValkyrieCain.
I've heard a lot of lovely things about Abu Dhabi, a more relaxed pace than the cliche of Dubai? In another posters advice I did join the British mums group and a lot if them sound pretty normal too.
We are all just missing dh so now leaning towards the move as and when it's possible with covid as a factor... Good to look forward to being able to dismantle the patriarchy as a nuclear family unit... Hmm

No Scottish but otherwise meet your criteria and very much scruffy! If it helps I can't remember the last time I set foot in a mall. I am being dragged to brunch this weekend against my will but that's the first time in six months!

You won't have forest and mud but you can have mountains, beach and desert (well actually you might find some mud at the beach). Have a look on the Facebook page 'off the beaten track UAE'. Loads of people camp here as well.

Your 120k housing won't go anywhere in the areas you're looking at. Find the school first and then choose areas to fit the budget.

No experience with Dubai but I’m an expat in Asia. My advice - make whatever sacrifices you can to stay together as a family.

I have seen many cases where the husband is in the expat posting and the wife/DCs either stay home or return home. They get used to the “single man” life and affairs and marital breakdown are common.

A friend tried it for 8 months and her DCs missed their father so much, even though in many ways it was tougher to go back to his city and reunite they are better off for it overall.

hi i have a 13 year old and moving to dubai, can anyone let me know what life for kids is like there? what the schools are like, whats the best type of school to go for? will they have a better life there then in uk with kids of similar age, what activities are available.
also as a mum what kind of things i can do or what jobs may be available for us part time etc? pls any advice is greatly appreciated. many thanks all

In terms of jobs, it depends on what you do! It's a big city - there are all the jobs available in a big city. It's an employer's market at the moment but that's the world over I think.

That said, a lot of would be minimum wage (or close to minimum wage) / zero hours jobs are effectively closed to British expats. You'll never realistically be hired to work check out at a supermarket for example.

In terms of whether your 13 year old will have a better life - it's just not possible to say. How happy is he/she in the UK at the moment? The 13 year olds I know spend their time hanging out with friends and trying to not have to spend time with their parents, pretty much the same as any teenager anywhere. What does your DC like to do?

She’s only got a few friends usual issues with friends up and down. I’m single mum eldest at university and I just got remarried hence looking for move for new start with new husband. Just worried about friendships and things to do and life in general there as know very hot and driving on opposite side also worries me will I be able to cope? How have others found life there with kids pls if any have gone from london? Thanks

Currently in my 6th year teaching in Dubai. My husband is also a teacher and we have a 9 yo daughter. We love it here and have never regretted the move. We don't go out drinking and brunching (though many do) but love our life here. Most of the year the weather is beautiful and in the summer we tend to come back to the UK. My daughter is thriving at school. The only downside is we miss family very much especially at the moment being unable to travel home or get them out. But in usual circumstances it is a shortish direct plane Journey. We spend our weekends at the beach, pool, cinema, parks etc. We live very comfortably on 2 teacher wages. My advice would be to negotiate free school places before you arrive if you are planning to teach here. Otherwise you will find school will hire you on a local contract and it will be harder to get a free school place. Happy to answer any questions.

Also, properties have come down in price massively. 120k is a good budget for housing and you will find a lovely place to live. We are paying 70k for a 2 bed apartment and moving to a townhouse in summer which will be around 85k for a 3 bed plus maids room

Also in lots of ways life is so much better for teenagers here as it's so much safer. They can hang out at malls Unsupervised until late at night safely. The main risk is the temptation to drink at house parties etc so you just have to make sure they are fully aware of risks regarding the possible repercussions of things like that. Most teenagers love their life here