For those on spouse Visas - how did you make it work?

[foxinthegarden1]

I would really love to hear from those of you who have moved overseas and are living on a spouse visa which means you cannot work.

I am in a real quandary about this. I love the country we would be moving to, we have been there before but last time I had a young baby so work was not on my mind. We have an amazing opportunity to move back, this time though the children are older and I am finally at a stage where I would like to work or at least be using my skills. Perhaps in a year we may choose to opt for a green card application allowing me to work, this though would be a long way of off.

For those of you that are living overseas on a spouse visa how have you made it work for you? What have you done that has meant you have fulfilled your needs? I would love to hear success stories on how you have met people, made friends and become involved in things outside of family life that have fulfilled you and felt meaningful.

Last time I was overseas I met a few expats mums who were feeling very defeated by their visa status and described feeling a little lost and lacking in identity.

I really want to make this opportunity a fulfilling one for us all but know that I could easily fall into feeling resentful if I don't make active steps into taking care of my needs.

I look forward to hearing x

Does your visa allow you to volunteer?

Your children sounds like they are school age, this gives you a lot of opportunities to get involved and meet other local families. And a year or even two is a short time, really, by the time you get there, find your way around the neighborhood and the school/health system, have the kids home through school holidays, do a few local trips or visit home,netc it will likely fly by.

Definitely worth sounding out expat groups but also trying to use the time to become part of the community through school, volunteering or local classes, if allowed and your budget will stretch to it.

If you are talking about a green card, then it must be the USA, right?

If so, the IR-1 visa includes work authorisation, and the green card arrives by post a few weeks after your entry.

Thanks very much for your replies!

Yes its the US and although this will be a 2 or 3 year visa I think the chance of an eventual permanent move is high. I am seeing this initial spouse visa (03) as a temporary way of living. I feel I know the area well due to our last trip, healthcare and returning to the same schools... so that early finding of my feet has already been done. Which in a way leaves much more space for myself as it feels I will be stepping back in rather than setting up from scratch.

We plan to apply for a green card within the 1st year of our visa so gaining the work authorisation is some way off.

I’m in the US- have been for 13 years. Initially we came on and L visa so I could work. I fell pregnant and already had a toddler so the next few years I was lucky enough to be a SAHM.
However, when I did go back to work it was part time as a TA (I was a teacher in England for a long time) and that suited me with young children still and no network of family help out here.
However, now I’m looking to go back full time (my kids are teens and I have to think about paying for college!) I’m struggling to convert my UK qualifications and get a job in a market where people don’t move when they get jobs so I’m basically waiting for people to retire! Plus it’s costing me a fortune to take courses and study for my certification after a 25 year break from studying! And then if I get a job I will need to find more money to get my Masters in order to keep my license!
It’s hard and a little depressing - I love the career I chose and if I wanted to do anything else out here I’d have to re-train anyway. Or the other choice would be retail I guess!
I have other ex-pat friends out here with different qualifications (architect, IT) who face the same problems in that their UK qualifications aren’t accepted here or that they’d need their Masters in order to compete in the job market out here.
Some things to consider whatever your career!

Is you DH an US citizen?

The people I know usually take the opportunity to study in the US. If you study a US masters then that may also look better on the Green Card application

Yes Barryallen I here you! I spent a lot of time figuring out licensing requirements on our first trip. Luckily I have a Masters which after lots of research means I could work in certain areas however without a particular licence not in others. I spent years and years studying here so if/when we get a green card I am going to sacrifice the areas of work that need that particular licence as I cannot bare to write one more dissertation or pay for any more training!

Having mulled things over today I think approaching a not for profit would be something for me to explore. Has anyone else done this? Also really keen to know anything else others have done to build a community network outside of school/kids. TIA

I definitely could not do it. I don’t how people stay sane not being able to work. I came here in an IR-1 (spouse of US citizen) and it was so important for me to be working right away. I already had been offered a job before I got here and started work less than 2 weeks after the plane landed. It’s not just for the money but the getting to know people, etc.

Your situation sounds eerily familiar. In the end we decided we could not move under those circumstances, so my DH’s company got us different visas which allowed me to work immediately (90 days for EAC) the visas we were ultimately put on also fast tracked green cards so all was good. I would not consider going if I could not have equal opportunities as my spouse.

CraftyGin - No unfortunately not

Myfoolishboatisleaning - That sounds like the ideal solution, was it a visa to the US? Would be keen to know if that visa was applicable to us.

A little concerning that theres been no responses from anyone on a suppose visa having a fulfilling time! Anyone...?

The spouse visa that lets you work would be L1 for your DH (intra company transfer - has to be working for company in the UK for at least 1 year and then go and work for same company in the US) and you and kids would get L2s and then when you arrive you would apply for your employment authorization and you're free to go and work for any employer or you could set up your own business, work freelance etc.

However, the fact the you're getting an O visa would suggest that the L visa is not the applicable one for your circumstances (as you know, the O visa is for people who are exceptional in their field). But if a green card application could be on the horizon after only the first year, I think that first year could pass very quickly getting yourselves set up and established in your new life. I'm not exactly sure if this would apply on an O visa, but at the point where you apply for your green card, you might be able to apply for employment authorization so you would only have a year of not working which might make things more bearable. Might be worth seeing if you can speak with the immigration lawyers to get a clearer picture of your options and future employment eligibility on that spouse visa, especially given the strong possibility of the move becoming permanent.

Yes, US. fox. I think it was L-1A. Bloody long time ago now. But they originally tried to put us on other visas (cheaper, I think) which would have given me no rights whatsoever. I would not consider moving to the US unless I could work.

I couldn't work but I had young kids so it worked out ok. I had a h4 visa. None of the other expat wives worked either. Bizarrely my visa didn't allow me to do voluntary work either officially, though I did anyway. I found my degree meant nothing without a masters, apparently us degrees are not as in depth as British ones, and my professional qualifications weren't transferable (accounting) and this was one factor as to why we returned rather than applying for green card status (which was likely to have been approved)

I agree about the master’s thing. I actually already had a master’s from the U.K., but it was still too specialised. I ended up doing another master’s here. It was a lot easier, although many people on this forum don’t like hearing that.

I’ve seen that also - friends with UK masters who end up retraining anyway. The US seems fairly insular when dealing with UK qualifications of any kind! I’m in the process of testing for my teaching license but even when I get it I’ll have to get my Masters before 5 years is up in order to keep my license! It seems education here is all about the $$$!

It was a dealbreaker for me. We wouldn't be here (US) if I couldn't work. DH could have come here on a TN visa (he's Canadian) instead of the L visas we have (TNs are much cheaper and faster), but I couldn't have worked if he was in that category. Thankfully his company realized that if he was going to move here they had to get me on board and they went the L visa route.

I'm in the USA on an O3 Visa, been here two years. Moved with a 9 month old and 3 year old. My husband's job was going to apply for green cards for us after a year here, it's been delayed a bit (something to do with a back log of applications) and current estimates are that it will be approved in 9-18 months time. I'm not sure about an EAD for me in the meantime, but I just had our third baby so I'll be a SAHM for a while yet. Hopefully I'll be able to work in a year or two. I've made some friends though a local mum's club and preschool. Probably not a very helpful comment as I'm not looking for work immediately as my kids are still young. My main concern is that if anything happened to my husband (death, lost his job...) then we all have to leave the country within 10 days!

I could work but licensing is a nightmare in my field, I am chugging through this very slowly.
The first year of not working was fine, the second year I found harder.
I have signed up for a part time college course. It is very expensive and as I have an MA I don't need it but it helps to fill my CV.
I also have a serious volunteer role.
But this isn't the same as working.
I have been in a classic expat place before and found it surprisingly easy as there were lots of people in the same situation and clubs during the day.
I have found the US harder as most people of my age would work and I have struggled to find day time activities.
I'm not unhappy but it is harder than I thought it would be.

Honestly, we came with a toddler and a newborn so I embraced SAHM. That was fine for a good year/18months then I lost all sense of myself and who I was and it took another two years before I could work and I struggled.

I did however discover cycling and did a huge charity bike ride that gave me something else (training, a community) outside the home.

If did however get much easier once I could work