Hi
I thought I should start a new thread with you rather than hijack someone else's.
So you're in Kyushu?
Don't worry that's a big place and I'm not about to ID you from that info.
Yes, I agree that Japanese have different priorities and expectations from westerners, especially with regards to childbirth and rearing.
One of my friends chose a hospital where the babies were looked after 24hrs by the nurses because she wanted to rest and figured that she'd have enough time with the baby after she went home.
As for fathers at the birth. I suppose that it being only a recent idea in their culture, it's a question not many of them think to ask. My DH was unusual among his friends in being at the birth of our DD.
He hated the idea at the start, but I insisted. He eventually came round to the idea and in the event he said it was the most amazing thing he's ever seen.
Japanese nurses just seem to expect men to faint and get in the way!