Single Mum- Job offer in USA. Good move?

[chedda88]

Hi everyone,

I am a single mum of 2 and I have just been offered a job in South Carolina. That means I will be moving from Bristol to South Carolina Charleston, to be precise.

It has been a long time coming but I am happy that I have been given the opportunity. I haven't accepted yet. I said I will get back to them by the end of the week.

I will be working as a Case Manager with Children's Services. However, downside is the salary. $40,000 USD which is about £30,000 . Roughly about what I earn now. Note, a lot of American job sites do not put the salary there, which is very frustrating! So I went out on a whim.

I have been able to manage just fine on this. But bear in mind I am a single mum of 2 very young children. I get additional help from the government whilst in the UK such as child tax credit, 30 free hours funding for my oldest.

I have lots of friends in Charleston and I have lived there before (many years ago) when I was 19 and 20 and I am now 30. But now I am a lot older and wiser. Plus I have kids! $40,000 USD, is that a good starting salary for a single mum with kids. I would have to stop my benefits in England and I am not sure I would be able get any government assistance in the USA until I am properly settled and my legal status changes.

Children's father should ideally help financially but I can't factor his "payments" into the equation right now.

Any advice would be helpful.

It is very much the nom to still be contactable when on annual leave. Summer clubs are expensive and needed for three months in some areas.
Are you friends with people who are case workers where you are thinking of going. Nothing would persuade me to take the job in Chicago but I imagine there is considerable variability.
The license program is pretty long winded but clearly laid out. It isn't that cheap though I think I have spent at least 700 pounds and haven't finished it yes.
As other pp have said moving is very expensive even with a good relocation package.
Look at daily living costs and moving costs, you may need decent savings to start this process.

@queencity
Good information.

1. Shipping of belongings - I do not plan to take many things with me except our clothing and portable electricals (laptops, ipads). My friends in Charleston said that they can easily get hold of beds for the kids and myself 2nd hand/thrift store, wardrobes too. My husband is currently living in the family home alone (long story !!) and I am not in the mood to start fighting over the flat screen tv etc and dining table.

1. Again same for electricals. The apartments I am looking at come with basic electrics, fridge, cooker etc

1. The visa issue, I am not worried about because I feel that if they want to really employ me, they would be considering this. I have a full time job in the UK already, so if they do back out it isn't really a major thing for me. It is my understanding that they (the employer) are the ones filing for me. When I speak with them tomorrow I will ask them about the type of employment visa they wish to obtain for me. I would hope the company (my role is actually in the family division of a local Court), would have done there research before offering me a job, But I will certainly bring this up with them

I think my stance is this with the employers. I am very interested in the job but I am not desperate. I think like you have rightly highlighted healthcare , holidays and childcare are perhaps going to be the biggest deciding factor for me.

Have you looked at the typical rents in the area? It is much more expensive than the UK. We pay $6k per month for a tired 4 bed house in Massachusetts near (but not in) Boston. Groceries and utilities are much more expensive inc water which is more than my annual gas bill in the UK! Basically, anything that is a necessity is much more expensive but clothes or items where there are a choice are much cheaper.

The visa issue, I am not worried about because I feel that if they want to really employ me, they would be considering this

You'd be surprised how many people are responsible for hiring but don't know anything about immigration law and employment based visas and their story might change when they realize what's involved in getting you there and how much it costs to get a visa (would they cover all immigration costs?). As someone else has said it sounds like you would only possibly qualify for an H visa and they next time that would kick in is October 2019. Why would they keep a job open that long?
Plus that's a lottery based system so not even guaranteed. You have a degree I hope?

www.uscis.gov/working-united-states/temporary-workers/h-1b-specialty-occupations-dod-cooperative-research-and-development-project-workers-and-fashion-models

I think you'd be utterly crazy to move your kids to go and live in South Carolina on $40k a year. I think you'd have a very low standard of living. You haven't actually said why this appeals to you so much?

More costs to consider, childcare I was paying 250/week at a good nursery/preschool for full time hours. Before/after School Care at the school (run by YMCA) was 100/week. They also covered inset days and public holidays the school closed for but offices didn’t in that amount.

Day camps with full day care for summer was about 250/week as well. I used to save a bit every month to put towards these costs. I’m unemployed right now and my DH earns far more than that, but still we couldn’t afford to send them to camp this summer.

I took my under 1yo to a stand-alone ER after hours of GP, cost me $2400. And we have ‘decent’ Healthcare. We would have spent between 30-50k in the last five years on copays for health. When we scratch our heads wondering where our money goes, that’s where it goes.

I just saw this and thought of this thread

Yep,I would say that's pretty accurate! 😀

Please do not even consider this move on that salary. They are offering you well below market rates for those roles which normally can only go to US citizens or greencard holders. I would say the role is bogus. This country can be like the Wild West and I call bullshit on $40k for a social worker being recruited from the UK. The social workers we have working with us here in North Jersey are making $55k straight out of school. Those with a masters in social work and more than 5 years of experience are making $98-115k plus pension plus excellent health, dental and vision insurance.

Other things to consider, are the amount of $$ you'll need in the bank to bankroll the move for renting property etc, as you'll have no credit history in the US and most places want a lot more cash upfront as a result.

In NYC I had to pay 2 months rent as usual upfront (1 month rent and 1 months as deposit) plus an extra SIX MONTHS RENT as security. Prices are stupid here so it was eye watering

For the PP asking about why you'd need insurance; one very good reason is (here anyway) you can't send your kid to school without vaccinations, unless there's a medical or proven religious reason. To go see the Dr is about ~$350 per visit for normal issues, then you'd have to pay the vaccinations on top. Not to mention the cost of all kinds of kids illnesses (broken arms, chest infections etc)

They are offering you well below market rates for those roles which normally can only go to US citizens or greencard holders.

I don't think it's below market rate for much of the Southern US (although I would expect a court-based social worker to be paid a bit more) but I agree with other posters that it's not enough to live on comfortably in Charleston. I also echo comments about health insurance and childcare. Those are big issues for the OP.

I love Charleston; I live not too far from there and visit close friends who live there often. I could happily live there, but there are considerable negatives in the OP's situation.

I also suspect it isn't much below market rate, I wasn't impressed with how little social workers earn in US, they also often employ unlicensed people as case managers. I was planning on working but one year in the issues with getting properly qualified here and the poor pay and conditions meant that I haven't done so. I have found voluntary court based social work I can fit in with supporting dc. A social worker was beaten to death in our area and it was barely noted in the news.

OP - this might be of interest to you. It definitely looks like there is room for negotiation. www1.salary.com/SC/Social-Worker-BSW-salary.html

Sadly though even if you get an improved salary offer I think you'll find that the visa situation will prevent you from going. As a PP said those interviewing are often clueless about visas. Let us know how you get on with them tomorrow.

I linked the wrong page. If you click on the link then click on the third job down in Charleston it will give you more detailed information.

No specific advice, but please be cautious about information you get about costs from people who don't live in the area you're looking to move to. There is HUGE diversity in house prices, rent, food, bills, wages, and even taxes (because so many taxes are local/state) etc etc across this country. The experience of someone from other parts of the US may not compare at all to what it would be like to be in Charleston.

Where I am, the rental market is extremely tight and house prices have risen rapidly in the last 5 years. Is that true of Charleston? I have no idea. Just be careful to get local information.

I live in the US. I think you'd be mad to take this offer. They aren't offering an "international" salary. This is what they give for the job and they don't really care about visas and moving costs etc.

You will be way way way worse off considering the cost of health insurance, child care costs/absolutly no state or federal subsidies etc. 40K is around the median/mean salary - that means a lot of people living in SC are hard-scrabbling to get by on this salary and live a somewhat normal existance. you would go under imo.

Have you researched the visa position yourself to know what you would qualify for?

Childcare may be tax deductible - check state tax filing rules

Check the tax situation more generally - as a rule of thumb, you have to pay more tax up front and then claim it back as a rebate when you file your return (so you have less cash throughout the year then a lump sum)

Check your likely leave entitlement and bear in mind you might have to work there for some time before you can take any paid time off (I accrued one paid day off for every month in my job, up to 16 a year....though there were more public holidays than in the UK)

Have you got savings to see you through the moving process? It's expensive - deposits for the apartment, deposits for utilities, new cell phone, new driving licence, no credit history making stuff more expensive and no overdraft....

Mellie health insurance doesn’t just mean doctors visits, it’s everything doctors, hospitals, blood tests, ambulances, dentists, opticians etc etc

When we first arrived in the states we had to get vaccinations for our children before they were allowed to attend school.

We were up to date with U.K. vaccinations but Texas requires things like HEP A and HEP B etc

Our insurance cards hadn’t come through yet so we paid for the shots. It was nearly $1000.

My children had never had a day off school in the U.K. and neither of them had ever had antibiotics. We soon learned that a new country comes with new bugs.

In our first year they had ear infections, strep throat and multiple tummy bugs. One also required hospital tests. Add to that the usual dental appointments and eye tests and you are talking thousands of dollars if we didn’t have insurance. Even with insurance it’s several hundred dollars of copay.

A friend’s child had an accident at a playpark. The ambulance cost the parents $4000, just the ambulance. They would also need to cover: X-rays, charge for orthopaedic consultant, charge for setting the break, charge for an overnight stay, charge for pain relief, charge for follow up appointments and charge for physio.

Another friend’s daughter had appendicitis. The hospital bill was $50,000. Even with insurance it cost the parents $7000 in copay

Paying as you go is not something I would advise doing in the US ever.

Living in the US on a healthy expat salary in a safe area with great schools and the money to explore the country and the culture is one thing.

Living here without all that is a totally different proposition.

I spent a night in hospital in the U.S., just being observed after fainting, and I saw a bill for $10k even though I was insured (insurer refused to pay due to a minor error on the invoice). Ambulance alone cost $500 even with insurance.

The fact they can't tell you exactly what visa they will put you on is worrying. There are restrictions with the different types.

@Melliegrantfirstlady the most delightfully uninformed post ever. Pay as you go 😂😂 I imagine you keep a few hundred thousand in your back pocket for such occasions?
On another note this would explains why so many people I know in the UK this going to the American system would be fine, no sweat. Before I lived in America I thought that only adults in Jobs had to pay and children and pensioner were exempt.
I was sadly disabused of that when my neighbour her sons had no health insurance not because she didn't want to pay but because between her colitis and hyperthyroidism, and her sons autism and CP's she could not get health insurance.

Op this is why employers insurance is important as my neighbour had to change employers to get coverage her old employer didn't offer it so as a private person she could not get insurance but under the umbrella of a big company she could.

Health insurance is your first worry. Child care the second.... 😬 it is very expensive. Women don't tend to work unless they are high wage earners

@Melliegrantfirstlady - your question made me laugh and also made me sad. as previous posters have noted, medical costs here are extortionate. I had no idea until I lived here. Bills for simple medical tests can easily run into thousands of dollars (I know from personal experience). And if you are unlucky enough to be hit by a car, or have some other catastrophic event, you can end up owing hundreds of thousands. It's a major cause of bankruptcy and homelessness. The nhs isn't perfect, but I sure missed it when I got a $5000 medical bill recently, and that's just for the services that insurance didn't cover after the birth of my daughter.

Op, I'd definitely ask about the visa. It isn't simple, and anyone in hr that tells you it is, isn't telling the truth. I've been through immigration. Happy to help if you want to send a pm.

Re: salary negotiation. In my experience working in the US, there is no room for negotiation over insurance. Either they offer it or they don't. I've never had a say in that.

Sorry to be negative. My own experience in the US hasn't been easy.

Healthcare healthcare healthcare. I'm in Texas, excellent insurance via my husbands work. Needed a crown on a broken tooth last month, cost me $1k as the insurance company claimed my dentist couldn't prove it was essential. They are disputing and I may get refunded .... but I may not and still had to have the funds available to pay.

Everything scotx said. Sorry OP, I wish you lots of luck but I agree you’d be hard pushed to get a visa.

Women don't tend to work unless they are high wage earners.

What are you talking about? This is just not true.

I wouldn't move to the US if you paid me.

Something like 600,000 people a year go bankrupt because of medical expenses. Many of them had health insurance. The insurance companies look for ways not to pay.

Gun violence is high. The prison population is huge.

Trump is the president FFS! What direction is this country going in?

Employees are treated like shit. Did you know they only get about 2 weeks a year holiday, and mothers can be expected to go back to work when their babies are 6 weeks old?

But, you may not get a visa anyway.

Why the US? Why not move somewhere with a better quality of life? Or somewhere else in the UK?

Being an expat as a single mum is hard work. Being an expat as a single mum with little money and virtually no free time (so little holidays / year) is a recipe for disaster.
You need to negotiate:

• health care
• more holidays

and if you can

• one return flight to UK / year for all of you
• possibly two years rent paid

I have been an expat for a very long time and what I have learned is that sometimes companies can't really increase salaries but there is flexibility in the benefits they can offer.

It seems to me you are keen to go as you have friends and used to live there years ago, but the reality might be very different than what you imagine.

I will repeat the health part is the MOST important factor. Even if you are healthy and your kids are, shit happens. Those injured by the Boston bomber had bills for half a million $.