How much hassle is it to uproot abroad? How do people decide? (Oz)

[TerrificEchidnaSpikes]

This is a bit premature, but I wanted to get my thoughts in order by laying them out stream-of-consciousness-style. Basically, people who have made the move abroad: What helped you with the decision? How hard was it to do, practically speaking?

The situation is that DH has been shortlisted for a job in Australia and is flying out to interview in less than a month. Obviously it's a big IF, but IF he is offered the job, it looks like a really great step career-wise... so (assuming he likes the colleagues/employer/location) it feels like he should go for it.

We have always said that we would like to live overseas again (long ago, pre-children and house and pets, DH and I have each lived/worked in other countries) at some point in our lives, so the principle of moving abroad has already been established for us.

But the logistics of uprooting everything are really daunting and almost enough to put us off the idea entirely! How do you choose schools for the DC? Will the cat cope with the move, or is it kinder to leave her behind? What on earth do people do with their house and furniture - sell or rent out, chuck or ship? How do we choose a place to live from the other side of the world? Not to mention, what if the job itself turns out to be not what we expected and the whole expedition goes sour?

I moved to Perth in my 40s, having never set foot on Oz before. We sold up everything and came with 30 boxes of stuff. We are here nearly five years now and my only regret is that we didn't come sooner. We won't be going back, I still have to pinch myself sometimes that I love somewhere so beautiful. In hindsight I would have brought more stuff although not furniture as houses here tend to be bigger and UK furniture doesn't really fit IMO. I would have brought more winter clothes, it gets bloody freezing in winter and they don't believe in double glazing (although I highly recommend getting a log burner). We didn't bring our car and were glad because it was a big black Audi with shit air con, so consider that too. Good luck!

WE have just moved back to NZ - best decision ever. We lined up a good moving company and they sorted us out.

If you move to Brisbane, move to the Ferny Grove train line area. DO NOT move to the south side of the city, even if you think great it is cheaper. It is also a shittier area. Not ghetto areas, but still blah.

I live in Mitchelton. Nice middle class area. The primary and high school are both small schools with great reputations, especially the high school. Less than 400 students. They take in Montessori kids and International kids from Asia. Crime is little. You aren't too far from ocean if you go up north a bit more. Bribie Island is a great place to visit.

It isn't cheap. Rent is crazy here. Even to buy is insane, but it is still cheaper and so much nicer than Sydney or Melbourne.

Brisbane is a bit dull compared to Sydney and Melbourne. But that means it is more peaceful and runs at a slower pace. And the weather is soooooooo much better.

Good luck.

Oh you also asked how we decided. My husband always wanted to move to Oz ( he was born here) and I said no for twenty years, for all the usual reasons. Then we found ourselves living in Ireland in the middle of the biggest recession ever. My husband lost his job and struggled to get another, I hated my job and couldn't get another. One day driving home from work on the 457th consecutive day of sideways freezing rain (or thereabouts) I suddenly thought, Fuck this! Lets do it! It took us just over a year to get visas, and pack up everything etc. We've never looked back.

[On preview, this is really long - sorry about that, I do go on ]

Currently we've been outside the UK for almost 5 years and we are in the later stages of planning for another move, this time to Australia. The upcoming move was an easy one to decide - my husband is Australian and since we met it's always been the plan to head there in the end. Our current location is lovely but very much a transit stop for most ex-pats - we have never imagined living here long term, so it's been an easy decision for us. My children are struggling a little bit because so much of their lives has been here and they fear the change.

For me, the timing is the key. I'm a relentless and ruthless planner - it's the only way I can feel in control of things like a major move. So, I have a project plan - just a simple timeline in Excel. I have estimated dates for everything to happen and their dependencies. As things get done I mark them off and adjust the dates.

Lessons I've learned/am learning so far, about moving with a family and household:

• everything has a lead time. Don't be caught out. So, even if you're not sure which way you'll jump, do some research and find out how long you'll have to do stuff. For example, our current flat has 2 months notice, but our utilities providers only need 24 hours - so that's all gone in the spreadsheet. Looking at your post, your long lead times will be related to the animals (rabies vaccinations and tests etc) and to your own visa situation.

• you can never declutter too early. I've worked through a room per month over most of this year (since we started to plan seriously). Now I know that pretty much everything we currently own is coming with us, or getting binned the day we move - but I've done the thinking.

• schools. We found a suburb we thought we might like to live, then we looked at schools and picked one, now we will look for a rental near there. We don't expect to have finally settled for another 12-18 months, but the school we've chosen has explained how their catchment works and we've planned accordingly. It genuinely does seem easier than the school situation in the UK, and everything I've read says most state Australian schools are fine-great.

• house. We sold ours when we left the UK as we knew we were unlikely to move back. I think it's a very personal decision - I wouldn't have wanted to give us a fallback position, as a PP suggests. Emigration with children can be hard sometimes, and I would not have wanted an 'easy' (hahaha) way to bail in the first year or so. We knew we had to stick it out unless things got totally unbearable, so we did and we're glad we did. I think you have to be on the ground in Australia to find a rental (although I know some people are lucky) so we're planning a couple of months in a holiday rental or Air b&B until we find something. When we arrived here our company gave us a couple of months in a serviced apartment, which was perfect.

I do know people who, even with small children, have managed to do the 'sell everything and move with a few boxes' version, so it may even work for you to move the way you've done in the past. I'm not built that way - I can cope with some chaos, but I need to control the things that are within my control! On the other hand, I'm expecting things to stuff up and I can deal with that well if I know I've planned most things.

One question - I haven't seen you mention your job. Are you planning to work? What will your visa situation be? Australian visas are generally expensive and time-consuming if you have to do them independently. My partner visa took 7 months even though we've been married for donkey's years and have Australian children - and that was considered fairly quick.

Oh, lots more really useful and detailed information overnight (daytime Aussie time ) thank you all! Today we're both feeling GO not STAY, DH has just had an email from their HR with his flight details for the interview.

I've just had a look at importing the cat to Australia and it does seem to take ages to get all the jabs and paperwork in order. I think in the New Year I'll make an appointment with the vet, regardless of what we decide.

Kurius I'm working part-time and would certainly intend to work there if it is allowed on my visa. But I wouldn't be in a rush to find employment anyway, as I'd imagine getting everyone moved and settled and finding our way around would be pretty time-consuming (to put it mildly).

Ship most of your stuff. You will spend the first 3-6 months doing trips to ikea and the like to get bits anyway but even if you don’t love your current furniture it’s one less thing to have to do when you get there. You can always replace stuff later but at least there would no urgency to do so.

It’s really not that much hassle. Packing up your house and the goodbyes would be the worst bit. Setting up bank accounts, utilities, mobiles etc is a complete doddle in oz. Medicare is a bit of a faff but still easy.

Expect to take the rough with the smooth and you’ll be fine.

Find out what the relo support from your dh’s work will be. That will help a lot.

Yes, Australia is expensive. Can’t advise on Brisbane as I’ve never been there.

In regards to the outdoors lifestyle be aware that Queensland has very high UV levels much of the year and it’s not advisable to be outside in the middle of the day. You can actually pick out the European tourists in Australia by their deep tan. Many Australians go out of their way to keep out of the sun!

Awww you’re moving to my home town!

I wouldn’t take a car with you, importing won’t be cheap but it will be stressful. Just be aware that they are expensive there.

I also disagree that the south side is crap. Yes if you’re heading past Mt Gravatt towards Logan it’s rough!

However east keen and western suburbs on the south side of the river are just lovely. If you’re lucky enough to live in these areas you may be able to get the citycat to work (slow by nice) and you may also have the train lines.

Do make sure you sus out transport options. Some places are only serviced by buses, so find out how long they’d take you to get to work or the cbd.

Agree that you should avoid being in the sun unless early or late in the day.

I’m jealous!

Things to consider,

Yes it will be an upheaval and the ex-pat life isn’t for everyone, but Brisbane is as good a place as any if you choose to live away. I disagree that it’s a sleepy town and being honest if you have kids, I doubt you’ll be looking to live in a city that is party central. It is more affordable to live in that Sydney and Melbourne, and the climate is better year round too. By affordable, don’t be fooled into thinking it’s cheap. Yes you get more bang for your buck than in the UK, the houses here are bigger – but a 4 bed, in a nice suburb, with good schools, within a commute to the CBD will be in the region of $750K + But if you are in the position to buy and buy a new home or build one. The state will give you $20K as a first home owner, even if you have owned in the UK. Rent is expensive, for example - $400/500 per week for a townhouse (3bed), 7KM out of the city. If you can keep your house in the UK and rent it out, its good to have that as an asset for the future, use an agent to save any hassle if something breaks etc. If you get a container as part of your relocation, ship everything. Its amazing how much starting again will cost you, think about replacing all your belongings – every dish, every utensil, your Christmas tree and decorations (btw customs will check that thoroughly), your kids bikes, scooters etc. Think about if you want to take your white goods, TV, fridge etc (as they will all need to run off adaptors (looks bulky, can cause and issue if you want to wall mount TV or recess a fridge) You can’t bring in your hoover. . . . If you go down the container route, get professional packers in. They will pack to space save, ie pack things into drawers - every little space you can imagine. And most things will survive the journey that way, trust me it’s a huge help at a time of great stress and heartache. But I know plenty of people who have done it all with a few tea crates of personal effects and suitcases. Consider if your DH job will give you flights home as part of the package, some UK companies will offer this. If you still have family/friends here consider that you will want to come home and see them. Trip home can easily cost $10K, it gets expensive doing that every 2 years and with the best will in the world you tend to spend it catching up with family, in their houses, drinking tea/wine and answering the same questions yes it is hot, yes I miss home, no I haven’t seen a snake yet, no I’m not tanned (I actually work, not just sunbathe). . . . . Christmas is not the same here, but you adapt to that or you come home at Christmas (again $$$) Schools are good and if you don’t have a good state one near you, Faith based schools are an option (like a private, but not with such high fees) or the private system. You get used to the heat, never consider living in a house that doesn’t have air con. Agree the northern suburbs are better, we don’t have a beach in Brisbane but the coast (sunny and gold) are an 1-2 hours away from the CBD. Some people commute into the city from them, I wouldn’t the traffic is bad and driving fast and careless – but it could be an option for you, if you want to live the Australian dream.
This is my 2nd migration, I would be lying if I said it’s easy. I miss my Mum and Dad, but they come out every year for 6 weeks and I know I’m lucky to have that. Facetime is a life saver. My friends are like family here, best friend is like an Auntie to my kids and the kids are like cousins. (she is also a Brit) But you adapt quickly and the perks out weight the negatives. Its not an easy life by far, we still work hard - 12 hour days are frequent but the flip side is I live in the house of my dreams, workout daily and have doubled our collective income since the move. Someone once said if you are good at something you will be a success in Australia and I believe that. Good luck, it’s a big move – PM me if you want any advice. (sorry for the HUGE post)

Just a teeny update, he didn't get the job - apparently he liked the employers and they liked him, but the role wasn't quite the right fit from either side. Ah well.

They told DH they may have a couple of more suitable positions opening up in the near future and have encouraged him to look out and apply.

Thanks to everyone for your insights though and we are definitely still up for moving abroad!