This is ridiculous - accents

[DeliveredByKiki]

My DC we’re 3.5 and newborn when we moved to the US, still here 5.5years later and they have weird hybrid accents that normally sound very American but occasional words and phrases are british. It’s never bothered me because in my head I’ve always known we’ll go home so they’ll readapt but recently it’s really been bothering me - I hate hearing them sound american.

I want them to be home for secondary school, I want them to be british, to sound british, have a british education, easy access to other countries, live in a country that actually has gun control. DH doesn’t want to move back, our quality of life is definitely better here (we’re in LA), my reasons seem churlish and especially not knowing what will happen re brexit - I basically think my hatred of my DC accents is coming from a place of true fear we’re never going home

At three, dd1 switched between a role playing glaswegian accent and our home counties (she played in scawtish). Now her accent is boringly south england, whereas ds1 who is 15, switches between south england and the most hideous fake american/ canadian accent I have ever heard. I still struggle that he gets away with it. Apparently he nearly caused a riot on the school bus one day because he got into an argument with his sister and his accent automatically switched into english. None of his friends had ever heard him speak like that.

Periodically we ask him what he will do if he ever decides to get a partner/ married. Will we never meet them? Will he be forced into complete silence when we are all in a room together, lest his partner learn that he doesn't really speak like that, and has been acting for years?

I miss dd1's weegie accent though.

A lot of our friends' children have developed perfectly normal accents. ds1 sounds as though he isn't quite sure where he comes from, but it's nowhere local.

I was an expat kid. My parents made me speak in their (British) accent and corrected me if I spoke with a local accent. I resented it. They made me self conscious and put yet another block in the way of me trying to fit in.

My kids are now expat kids. They don't have the same accent as me. I would never dream of 'correcting' them. their accent is theirs, and is testament to the frankly awesome job they do of being tiny global citizens, picking up whichever new playground rules apply in the latest posting, making friends and saying goodbye, growing up in shifting sands.

My DH is British and has a 'local' accent. I'm from a different European country but now have a 'local' Britsh accent {from where I learned my English). Our DC have been round the world expat kids and have had various accents according to the schools and communities we lived in. DCs now back in the UK and have that 'non accent' which I think is a shame because I really like accents. I like the fact that accents very much define where people are from and they should be proud of it. Nothing worse than listening to people who try to talk 'posh' to disguise where they come from....and I have met a few.

I'm American; my parents are immigrants that moved to the US before I was born. I'm sure the cultural divide was difficult for them at times as I'm very much American and not of their culture. But I'm very grateful to them as they gave me a better life and also a bit of courage. I'm not sure I would've moved to the UK if I didn't have them as role models. And it's given me a new bond with my mom, as she can relate and we have our own conversations about what it's like to build a life in a new country.

I don't think my parents anticipated what it would be like to raise American children, and I don't think they always liked it. But they've given us the gift of a wider range of experiences and the freedom to choose. I will always be grateful to them for that.

Children typically belong to the culture they grow up in.

When we moved back to the UK, they lost their very strong accents in about a year.

But yes, they very much belonged to the culture of the country they grew up in.

So that is hard if you don't love that country!

We lived in the US when DS1 was little and once he started nursery he started to say things with an American accent - Mommy, carrrrr, etc. I hated it! We moved back here when he was two and he very quickly started to sound 100% English, despite DH being American. I suppose it must be weird for DH and his family to hear our boys speaking with English accents, but I'd have really struggled if they'd sounded American and I think I'd have had to bite my tongue not to make comments about it. I think you have to grin and bear it though. They will want to fit in, not be the odd one out.

My son can switch between American (including dialects!) and a British accent. We lived in the States (LA also) for a couple of years including when he was learning to speak. We still visit often.

If your children are exposed to accents, they will pick them up. Keep them listening to UK stuff (audiobooks!) if you like the accent.

I quite like my son's internationality. School didn't mind he said "faucet", "twenny" and "zee", they just reminded him which country we were in and to me the exposure to the culture difference is worth its weight in gold.