Grip required if anyone has one spare?

[Lotsofplanetshaveanorth]

Been living in tinybeachtown oz for four years and just had a fleeting visit from my dad. Lovely few days of beach and sandcastle building and him reconnecting with the children. We have just popped him in his plane home and I am wailing proper tears. Any advice on how to get through next few days? DH is trying to be nice but have sent him to another room as all I can do is cry and I am worried I will say something horrible, blaming him for us living so far away from my family and friends.

I know what you mean. I'm not going to vice you a grip but a hand to hold.

We live overseas as well, although not as far away as you, and see my family for one long holiday per year. Last year, my dad said "We should enjoy these visits as much as possible. I probably have only about 10 more of them to go in good health" (He is in his mid-70s).

I don't know what the solution can be. Do you plan to stay in Australia forever? Do you plan to move back or bring over your parents in their old age?

Go for a walk around smallbeachtown and remind yourself why you are here, why you have your children here and remember all the lovely things you did with him.
Do you want to move back or are you just sad that your dad has gone? It's ok to lock yourself away for a day [unmumsnettyhug]

I want to move back. ..Which is probably why it hurts so much DH supportive (in words) but not sorting his visa (in practice). I am not going to leave him ...but man today feels hard.

Thanks so much. Writing tonight off with tears but will do lovely walk tomorrow. We have had a truly lovely few days and there are good reasons for being here with children. Just can't stop wailing tonight.

I just got back from 6 weeks in the UK and it is hard. I am so happy here though so different. I cried at the airport for hours!

Ring/Skype your dad. He's no longer physically there, but it so much easier and cheaper to keep in touch these days. We are abroad - not quite like Oz - but I also console myself that even if we were in the UK we wouldn't be just down the road and we wouldn't always be on holiday. Do you know when you'll see each other again? I find it helps to have a date in mind - however far in the future. My lovely dad died this summer and I'm so glad we were in touch as much as possible even if we couldn't physically see each other as much as I would have liked. You are right to treasure every moment - sorry this probably isn't cheering you up at all. Good to have a good cry - it comes from a good place, but don't stop enjoying life by the sea in Oz. If you come back you'd only be crying for the things you miss there. Sending hugs delete where applicable.