New in France feeling a bit lonely

[helenhismadwife]

Hiya

We have recently moved to France and although I love the lifestyle and the locals are really lovely to us I am finding it a bit hard partly because my french is so poor, I am really trying to learn to speak it but because I used to have a busy job and quite a busy life its quite hard not having anyone to talk to.

DH is away quite a bit working, I take my two dd's to a nursery/toddler group once a week and they are really nice to me but I miss having a good old natter.

Sorry if I sound moany I dont mean to, I would really appreciate any advice or meeting up with other local mums. We are in a place called Civray about 40 minutes from Poitiers. I havent driven here so am a bit nervous about doing that especially as my car is rhd

Hiya. We're in France too, but nowhere near Poitiers unfortunately (in the Pas de Calais). I know what you mean about finding it hard to integrate. My French has improved a lot, but it is still tiring compared to speaking English. I am planning to do a four/five day intensive course at the local university as I think it's the only way I'm going to really sort my French out properly. would something like that be an option for you?

There are quite a few expat websites out there (frenchentree.com is good, for example) that have message boards which might help find some English speakers.

Oh, and don't worry about driving. We have got a LHD car now, but it doesn't make much difference except when overtaking.

I am in France. I am a couple of hours south from you, in Bordeaux. There is a train direct from Poitiers....

How old are your children?

I don't live in France but couldn't pass this by without commenting as I know what it like to move abroad especially when you are struggling a bit with the lingo. My friend lives in France & runs this website frenchentree.com/france-charente She's the one on the right on home page and is due to have 1st baby in January. Sorry, my French geog is a bit dodgy, but isn't Poitiers in same departement? Sorry if not, but this is a good website to have a look at anyway and covers all regions of France.

Good luck, keep trying with the language. It will get easier.

Hi

thank you for your support, Lummox its a bit hard to organise anythng like you have because my dh goes away quite a lot and out two dd's are really young but I will look into it anyway there is a group that meets on a friday evening for english and french to learn the language but we cant take the girls.

Bobo my girls are 2 and a half and 15 months so quite young, I will certainly be coming to Bordeaux when the flights to Bristol start up again thats where I used to live.

I have looked at the website it is one my husband has used in the past, and yes we are in the same region.

We have a house we're renovating near to Couhe (Payre) which is about 20 mins from Civray. Unfortunately we don't live out there yet as we've only just managed to get water in the house !! Still no floors or electricity !!!!! I have a DD 18 wks but are hoping to be settled there ready for her to start school.
If you really make the effort, you'll find you'll pick up a lot of the language solely by being there ! I'm really jealous of you living the dream while I'm stuck over here still...
With regards driving, you'll probably feel more confident in your RHD car than fiddliing with gears in a LHD one, only problem comes when overtaking on single carriageways.... my answer is .... DON'T GO SO FAST !!!! Good luck and I hope to be over there witgh you in the next couple of years !!

Hiya frenchmummy

We were in Couche a few weeks back it is very close to us. Its hard getting a house sorted when you are not here we had another house near confolen we used as a holiday home took quite a long time to get it sorted.

you do pick up the language from being here, I managed to explain to the pharmasist the other day that my dd2 was teething and she had a sore bottom . I got teething stuff and cream for her derrier (I hope) What I need is a french person who speaks good english to help me with my french and maybe I can help with the english

There is a great toddler group in civray when you move here, people from quite a way out come to it!!

Hey there!
We moved to France 2 years ago and could hardly speak the lingo. I'd only been driving for about 8 months and was very nervous about driving around France! But circumstances arose that meant I had to, and I did! You just cope with these situations! It is bad when your language skills aren't good, but that does improve, it really does! And most French people are very obliging. It is hard though at first, very hard to settle in. But set yourself little deadlines, like staying put until Feb and then reviewing the situation with your dp. Little landmarks like this make it all that more bearable.

And you know, you can swap lessons with a local. You teach them English in return for some French lessons! You don't have to be a teacher to do this, just spend 2 hours a week with each talking the others language. Not only does your language improve but you build up a friendship too!

Best of luck!

why do people move to france when they cant speak french

To learn Cod. It's the best way. So long as you try the French are much more patient than the English would ever be!

Will learn the lang quicker & with more vocab whilst in the country - lots of opportunities to learn & you have to speak.

Hi rhubarb

I have found that the french are really lovely if you make the effort to talk french they are as you say very patient and you do pick things up quite quickly

Its mainly just being able to talk without having to think for ages that is hard and that is what I miss, people are more widely spread here so although there is quite a large english community they often live quite a distance away

thehighwaycod some people are forced by circumstances to move out of the uk to somewhere they cant speak the langage I guess you could say why go anywhere if you cant speak the language. In France unlike in the UK most people can speak a little English

Helen, my email address is gggglimpopo at hotmail dot com

Contact me if you like. My littlest dd is 22 months.

Hello rhubarb!

Hi bobo

thank you for that I will e mail you my youngest is 15 months perhaps you can help me with school stuff Im a bit confused about it

Helen

Hi Helen,

I just wanted to reply as I almost posted a message on this board - my title would have been 'New in Switzerland feeling a bit lonely!' I've been here 5 months and am also grappling with the language, but German not French I am also finding it very hard to get used to being on my own a lot after working in a busy office.

About driving; I never drove a lot in the UK as I've never owned a car. But I made my husband take me driving, firstly down a very quiet street and then on the motorway when I felt a bit more confident. The first time I drove on my own was only a 5 minute drive, but I was incredibly nervous! However, now that is out of the way it is all fine and it's amazing how quickly you get used to things.

About meeting other mums, I joined a Yahoo group for expat mums in Switzerland and found some in my area, also I found that there is an Anglo-Swiss club in my town. There may be something similar in France. Once you meet a few people they introduce you to their friends and all of a sudden you know loads of people. Good luck with it all!

Angela

cod there are expats from the uk all over the world who don't speak the indigenous language, why pick on France

Hiya Ange

it is hard to settle down and tough when you are trying to speak a new language, I often find the moment in the conversation has long passed by the time I have worked out what they are saying and a responce to it

I have driven, I followed dh to collect some stuff it was quite a long drive as well about 45 minutes it wasnt as bad as I thought, I am worried about getting on the wrong side of the road when I am on my own and not following anyone, but in a way it helps that the car is a rhd I just need to remember to stay near the kerb!!

I will have a look at google and see if there is an expat board there as well

thanks for your help, I hope you are settling down in switzerland. I have to say that having the girls helps they are a real ice breaker!!