Trailing spouses of oil and gas sector

[froginthepond]

I was wondering if there were any trailing spouses on here who have husbands in the oil and gas sector. My question i wanted to ask is if you moved for dh's job on an expat package where did you move to and were you allowed to find employment too?

Frog I like Aberdeen, plenty to do and lovely countryside (I'm into walking and cycling), good schools for the kids. The only big drawback is that you can't get cheap flights to anywhere very easily.

I liked Houston too - we were in Sugar Land - again lots to see and do, and weekend trips to Austin, San Antonio, New Orleans, Corpus Christi all very easy. It is a big cosmopolitan city, traffic was awful when we were there in 2000/2001, I can only imagine it has got worse.

I also know what you mean about Louisiana, we rarely heard good things about New Orleans (dirty and dangerous was the general view) and having had the same vibe that you had when I spent a week in Tel Aviv I do think you get a gut feeling about places.

Thanks Megrim I know at the end of a week feelings are very much in the gut as you dont have time to go cross analysing everything but if thats what time and experience you have from a trip then that is what you have to go on. Aberdeen is great i think from spring to autumn, winters can be dim though. I think going back to any city is going to shock us anyway with traffic times. I live the fact that in Houston you can access so many other places. Im also looking at Perth in Oz and was thinking the public transport there would be a winner but im reading that its not that great. Im worried about being somewhere that feels isolated. Aberdeen feels like that to me and i think Perth Oz may be the same.

*love the fact

Hi Frog, my DH works in oil and gas in oz..we came out on 457 visas and now have permanent residency. There were no employment restrictions for me the spouse on either visas. Heads up though...I'm in Qld and oil and gas is slowing down, lots of projects being shelved, large redundancies going on in the operators as well as service companies. I know lots of oily expats and generally most up have moved to oZ on intercompany type arrangements but a few came to take up a new job. Most of us have great health cover and return airfares once a year to the UK which is a massive benefit. We had our relocation costs paid but be wary that if you come out on a 457 the employer under the visa rules is only obliged to pay your airfare home if the employment ends...make sure any new employer is also contractually bound to pay for the return of your container, break lease etc if the job doesn't work out otherwise you'll be forking out to get back! No one I know gets private school fees paid since education here is free (ish!) in the state sector (not WA in state schools on 457 though). HTH.

Hi ifink thanks for the info. Its Perth we are looking at for Oz as we have family and friends there too. I had read elsewhere on mn to be careful with contracts not including cost of flights if jobs end and people being stuck. Do you know what the job market is like in Perth? Oil and Gas wise? When i have looked at jobs there are not a lot coming up, about the same as Houston in the US but LOADS for middle and far east! I thought Perth was ths main hub for oil and gas in Oz? I know you said you have PR but do you see yourself having to move in the future?

Yip...Dubai and now Singapore. I haven't worked since leaving the uk, mainly because I have spent my time settling us in, finding school and learning about the place and people. Starting to think though I would like to do something on a part time basis

I'm an Oil and Gas expat with my DP as the 'trailing spouse' - we are very fortunate as we work for the same company and they will move us as a 'dual career couple', usually the deal is one on expat terms and one on local terms and that works out well. If you don't work for the same company my employer does provide assistance for training and if visas allow, finding work.
Most of the spouses I know who don't work spend their time doing degrees or other training, looking after the family, doing a lot of charity work and put a lot of effort into things like shopping and cooking. I get our Amah to go to the market for me and throw together quick meals, I am always slightly embarrassed when I complain something isn't available here and am told it is here but only on a random day of the week or in some obscure place - they are often nice enough to offer to pick some up for me though (smile)
Most of the trailing spouses I know say they have never been busier!

Oh and we moved from Aberdeen (which I loved) to Malaysia which I also love!
Perth and Oman I think are top of the wish list for next posting!

Thank you everyone! I am really loving this thread as it nice to read such positive messages from people even if there is caution in some messages. I have heard trailing spouses being refered to negatively and the "bratty expat child" being banded around over the years which has put me off but its nice to hear positive stories. Im also on Britishexpats forum and the women one for the Middle East trying to read up as much as possible. Before we decide when and where to move

(smile) at 'bratty ex-pat children', most of the kids I have met here are genuinely lovely, they run around the playground in little gaggles at the 'club' in the early evening with the big ones looking after the little ones, a mix of half a dozen languages and many more skin colours - it's almost convinced me that I might want one! Equally they generally seem to be able to sit at a table and have dinner with parents and their friends from quite a young age. I'm sure the parents have to work to make sure they appreciate how privileged they are but I certainly wouldn't assume that ex-pat life will 'ruin' your children!!
As a dual career spouse I have nothing but respect and appreciation for the 'trailing' spouses - especially when they include me in things and bring me back groceries from far afield shops I never get around to reaching!

We've been in Houston since August. We live out in Katy, and one commutes to Galleria, the other to Energy Corridor. Traffic is not bad if you can leave the house before 6am which I do. They are CRYING out for people here, and there is a large turnover as people are jumping between the eng. companies for better conditions/pay, therefore they actually treat you quite well to keep you. We have flexible working, I start at 6.30 and finish at 4, to be able to pick up kids from afterschool clubs and get home by 5pm.

We transfered here as local hire, it's not so bad, we ended up buying a house, and both DH and I got large payrises as the local market pays well. We also get to keep our tax returns, previously when we were expats, our company got them as they did tax equalisation etc... Taxes here are low as there is no state tax, which is really good.

The market for renting, especially in West Houston is VERY tight. There is not much around at all. Houses sell very quickly also in this area. We bought ours which had been on for 12 days and had 3 asking price offers.

I'm not sure I'm keen on the place. The neighbourhoods pretty much empty out for the day, although in Katy there are more SAHMs. Our neighbours don't mix with us, we've made some attempts with our immediate neighbour as they have similar age children. Everyone just seems so busy with commutes and work, and then so tired, so tired. Even on the weekends, kids are in baseball or other sport on saturday, and all at church on sunday. We really hardly see anyone around.

If you want to check schools in Houston try www.greatschools.org. They are very strict where your child will attend school in your neighbourhood where you live. on Zillow and HAR you can check catchment zones. If you move houses, you have to transfer schools. We were caught as we were in temp accommodation for 3mths, and sent DS1 to the catchment school, but we moved, and have stayed quiet about that, as we know he couldn't have coped with another school move so soon. He will move for the 2014/2015 school year though.

www.HAR.com HAR is the estate page to look at, it's the only one that is regulated, so if you use others, they can still show houses for sale which actually aren't. Use it to get an idea of prices etc, but most likely there will be none of the houses still for sale/rent after 2-3mths.

Get the best medical insurance you can, even though there will still be large deductibles and copays. I took DS1 to the doctor the other day and had to pay $110 for the appt as it was a 'sickness' appt. $110!!! DS2 needs a well check, but they advised waiting until he is 4, so he can have well check and vacc's at the same time. Then the appt will be on insurance, otherwise I'd end up paying if I did them separately. It is really confusing, and you just have to trust that they are telling you the right things. They are also very hot here on vaccinations for school aged children. We couldn't register DS1 until he'd been caught up, and then had reminders for boosters that had to be done by a certain date, with proof sent in to the school nurse.

If you want to know anything else, have any questions, ask away. I don't know much, but may be able to help.

oh.... and there is a British/Expat group in Katy and also a NZ/OZ group here. They organise quite a few things, members have several groups going, book clubs, golf, lunches, dinners out, bbq's, coffee mornings etc... Keeps you a bit sane, and you can immediately make a few friends.

Can I very tentatively poke my nose in here? I am not a trailing oil-and-gas spouse, but it's very possible that I will be in the not too distant future. DP works in the industry, we don't like where we are in the UK, and once I graduate my current course of education later this year we will have nothing tying us here (no children, don't own a house, and I have absolutely no idea what I want to do with my life and qualifications so if I'm going to be figuring that out, it doesn't really matter where I do it- there are no opportunities for me where we are currently). Foreign postings come up a fair bit with his employer, and this seems like an ideal time to go for it - it's something we've both fancied for quite a while.

Good idea? Bad idea? Potential pitfalls to watch out for?

Hi Naoko, i am in the same boat as you. There are very little opportunities for me here but lots for dh all over the world. We are aiming to try and relocate in approx 2 years. Is there anywhere you fancy going? We were set on Oz, spent 6 months researching but have not shelved the idea and are looking at America (Houston). I have found this thread to be very helpful so far

HerRoyal thanks for the post both dh and I are now keen on Houston as the more we researched Perth in Oz the more we thought it would not be for us. We both love America though and have both been although the only part of Houston i have seen is the airport! We have been to other places in the US and are happy with what we experienced on the most part.

Hi Frog, took a while to get back on MN. yes loads going on still in Perth in oil and gas. Not as busy as 2years ago (I hear even the rental market has slowed down cos at one point it was crazy). Let's just say my DH's role and a few others will be relocating to Perth by mid2015 as his company see that as their main base in Oz....QLD was a big growth thing for a few years but it's gone off the boil. We are not sure about going to WA but he doesn't think he'll find a similar level role in QLD for a long time if he quits his company to start somewhere new. Apparently he is under consideration for a transfer to Russia.....am not sure what to think of that.

We haven't really got our heart set on anywhere, and are feeling very open minded about whatever comes up internally. There's a couple of places I'd rather not go, and DP is the same, but that's fine, there is no rush. Houston is a possibility for us too, as are other parts of North America. But it could really be anywhere at this stage. Until I graduate it's all pretty academic anyway (no pun intended) because that is one tie that needs to be dealt with before we can go anywhere.

Once that's over and done with, though, there's a fair few places we'd consider. Like I said above - no children, not house owners here, so our only real criteria would be whether DP would enjoy the job, whether it's somewhere we (as adaptable, reasonably adventurous adults without little ones to consider) could enjoy living, and whether there is scope for me to do something (preferably work, but would consider other things) so I don't go nuts with boredom.

Naoko sounds like an ideal time to start an ex-pat lifestyle. People I know here in Aberdeen have lived all over the world - Europe, the Far East and Australia, Caribbean, North and South America, Africa & Middle East, and one spent some time with the Antarctic survey (although not sure that would be very spouse-friendly!). My neighbours loved their time in The Congo in the 1970s, work friend loved Southern Africa in the 1980s, best friend liked Oman in the noughties, another spouse reckoned her favourite posting was Caracas, for another it was Buenos Aires. So many interesting places to choose from.

For DP, make sure you research contract types - the international contracts were the most lucrative when we relocated, but the company could move the whole family on to another country at short notice.

I was an O&G trailing spouse. Spent time in Aberdeen, London, Melbourne, Perth and The Hague. We've relocated permanently to Perth. Can't imagine anywhere better to live, work and raise a family.