Moving to New York - where shall we live??

[Seabird]

DH has got a job in NY (Manhatten). DD is 2.5, DS 15m. We currently live in Clapham, London and I love it that there are so many other mums of toddlers around.

Where can I live that's got a sense of community, we can get a house with a garden but I don't feel too isolated & dh has a reasonable commute? I know that's a tricky balance but we can afford a reasonable rent. I'm a hypnotherapist and would like to build up a practice there too but I guess I can do that most places.

As ever we need to start making decisions quite quickly so any tips will be very welcome!

Not related but you will need a bugaboo
I did not see any other make of pram while in NYC at all!

I better learn to spell Manhattan right too

Anyone know any NY based mumsnetters...??

If you're going to live in Manhattan with kids then it's got to be the upper west side. it's kid central (not to mention that central park is spitting distance away). But it's not cheap but then again, neither is anywhere in Manhattan.

You could go to Brooklyn - also family friendly - as are the commute suburbs like West Chester, but you really do want to live in Manhattan if you can - particularly if you're only there for a short time, because you live in the City. Can't be beaten.

Brooklyn, defo - much more like a London suburb and pretty close in. There are also some nice parts of Queens. Manhattan impossibly expensive I would have thought.

Westchester etc a bit Stepford wives....

Seabird, there has been another thread like this not that long ago, will see if I can find it.

When you live in Manhattan, going to brooklyn literally feels like a day trip. We went once in the entire time we lived in Manhattan. But I guess if you live in Brooklyn, and you commute into the city for work, then it's not bad. You definitely get more for your money.

One here, not just about NYC.

A NYC one

HTH

Thanks a lot - I couldn't search the archive, my browser kept crashing.

Someone suggested Hoboken, someone else Westchester - I did wonder if W Chester might be a bit Stepford. We're in a 5 bedroom house at the moment so the cupboard sized apt we could afford in Manhattan would probably drive me insane!

Will check out that other thread now...

Has anyone "seen" pegasus recently? I tried to CAT her as it sounds like she's been in a v similar situation to me and is just moving to NY with similar age children & similar criteria for where to live, but she doesn't receive emails apparently

We have recently moved away from Manhattan (after only 6 months there...) and we were not able to strike the perfect balance so we opted to live on Roosevelt Island because there was lots of green space (including Central Park one subway stop from us). DH worked long hours and I really did not fancy waiting hours for him to return home at the end of the day. I hope someone else comes along with better advice shortly.

I was amazed by the number of Maclaren Techno XT push chairs actually!

New Jersey is a good option if your dh is working anywhere near Penn station - we lived in Morris county and dp's commute was well under an hour. It was almost rural (though attitudes were still fairly suburban), and the Pocono mountains in Pennsylvania were driveable for a day trip. The schools and community spirit were very good.

IMO, Hoboken would be good if you had no kids. I lived there for a few years in the late '80's (very much pre-children), and my recollection is that there isn't much green space to speak of. But, that might be OK if you could get a house with a garden. Not sure how good it is for families, but it might be worth a look at it's bound to have changed radically since I was last there.

Depends. If you want the green leafy suburbia feeling - go to Greenwich/Riverside/Old Greenwich, Connecticut. (45 minutes by train). You mentioned Stepford. The new version of the film was made in my hometown. So, yeah, Greenwich is SERIOUSLY Stepford. On the good side, it has FABULOUS schools, a choice of great beaches, an incredible library, wonderful playground and super restaurants.

Drat. Now I am homesick.

Going off to feel gloomy.....

SOrry, I am new here and didnt have time to read all the replies so I apologize if I'm repeating.

I was born in Brooklyn, we moved to Westchester when I was about 10 and my parents still live there (I lived in Moscow, then Manchester, dh is from London, we dont know where we're going to be in a month ha ha ha)
Anyway,It sounds like some areas of Brooklyn would suit you best. Frankly I think that Westchester, and most of New Jersey (someone mentioned Hoboken) would be a real shock to you coming from s London (which by the way I love - we want to live in Stockwell). Westchester is extremely well-to-do (almost no rental market, BTW) and very white, also quite conservative. It certainly was a huge shock to me when we moved, and I continue to feel uncomfortable with the people and place for the most part.
Brooklyn (depending which area - it's quite big) offers what you're looking for, I think. For example, Carroll Gardens would be about a 45 min commute to upper Manhattan, and is a lovely, very child-friendly area of brownstones, lots of parks, independent neighborhood shops where the baker knows your name, etc. Rents have risen, but are still not outrageous, and it's famous for it's relatively large gardens (if you get a ground-floor flat). Equally nice would be Park Slope - I think a bhit hipper, more restaurants etc but next to Prospect Park which is Bklyn's central park, still definitely a neighborhood feel and a reasonable commute to the city. If you really have some cash, you might also like Brooklyn Heights -obscenely gorgeous views of the harbour and Manhattan, a quicker commute into the city, one of the nicest residential neighborhoods in all of NYC imho.

As someone has said, if you want to actually live in Manhattan, it has to be Upper West side. Although the rents will deffo be higher than in Bklyn. And although the area is nice, I personally think it is less of a neighborhood feel (bigger streets, more traffic, all around busier and more hectic). What I love about Brooklyn is you have all the benefits of the big city, but still a quite neighborhood to come home to.

I hope this helps, and enjoy your ny adventure!

In Manhattan - Have a look at Battery Park City, a lot of Brits with families live down there - lots of space - new buildings, downside - the ex-WTC building site. Once you move out of Manhattan you need a car - and all the hassles that brings.
dawn

Hi seabird

A move to NYC, how exciting. We moved here in Jan 05 and love it. We're on the upper westside...DH works midtown so hardly a commute for him and we are beside central park so not suffering loss of garden! (though we are both used to apartment living anyway. Have a DS 7wks 3 days who is screaming his head off now, so must go..but will read through this strand properly when I get the chance. Where is DH going to be working? Suburbs phenomenal size houseing but yes can be a bit stepford wifey...and how often do you get the chance to libe int he best city in the world. Manhattan is phenomenal for kids...very child friendly even if you had to down size regards to space. Will write more soon...gotta feed him...

i've only visited NYC but just wanted to say that i loved the upper west side

thought it was fab fab fab

Brooklyn is now very hip and happening with all sorts of nice stores and restaurants and lots of families. A bit like clapham really. You will definitely get more for your money in brooklyn than in manhattan. The commute into midtown is really very easy on the subway. The biggest choice I tihnk is whether you want your own "house" or your own outdoor space. There are two main types of places in new york. Either you get a town house (or an apartment in one) which will have lots of character and charm, but can be dark and creaky and probably won't have any outdoor space. Or you get an apartment in a building or a loft (warehouse) which will probably be more spacious and modern, but without great details, but is more likely to be light and have outdoor space. You want to make sure that whatever you get has "hardwood floors" and "high ceilings" and "double paned windows." ....those are real estate buzz words. They will quote you things by square footage, NOT necessarily number of bedrooms the way they do in the uk. So measure a few rooms in your house and get an idea of what the square footages of things means.

And by the way, you will find that the nyc subway is hands down the most child friendly public transport you will ever travel on. There may not be any elevators, but you won't be more than 2 secs at the foot or head of a stairway without someone offering to help with your stroller (american for buggy) and people always get up to give you their seat in the subway.
You will find everything you need in the usa except pg tips so pack lightly. And be prepared...you won't ever want to go back to the uk. Hey, also if you are planning to stay long term...there are areas of new york that have superb public (state) schools. The school you go to is solely based on being in the local area, so you might want to consider that as well. If you are going the private school route, you have to start applying now!!!

seabird
i have two friends who have just recently left manhattan with their families, one lived on madison ave and the other in the lower east side.

both love NY for themselves but not for their kids, firend no 1 just back at the weekend and remember the heat and how uncomfortable the city was for her dd last summer .

brooklyn is probably the place to go for a familiy atmosphere, i had another friend who lvied there and loved it. its still close to manhattan.

i guess manhattan is quite expensive
will u buy or rent

Hi Sofia how are you?

I like Brooklyn too
We have friends in Westchester (they like it, not been out to see them yet as they only moved recently) and the Lower East Side (they like it there too it's quite scummy tho in a sort of Camden way), Queens (not my cuppa) and Brooklyn. Out of them all I would choose Brooklyn to live in I think.

Hi CD. Of course.... I have to say that the very very best place to live is Los Angeles.....where I am enjoying the weather and friendly people.

Hi Seabird,

Sorry I have been offline whilst we moved over here and we have only just bought a computer! We had basically the same situation as you though we moved from a semi in St Albans so are used to living outside the big city that DH works in. We had 6 weeks in a serviced apartment in Manhattan (Battery Park City) whilst we looked for a permanent place to rent. We kept going backwards and forwards between wanting to stay in Manhattan in an apartment so that DH would have a short commute and we could see the city to wanting a house with a garden and lots of bedrooms for visitors to come and stay with us. In the end we decided to opt for the latter partly because we were eating takeaways/ delivered junk food all the time and that is not a healthy lifestyle! We house-hunted in New Jersey and Westchester and only decided against New Jersey because of the crime statistics. So now we live in Rye (-in Westchester) which is lovely but yes it is very white and it is the most expensive place in Westchester, which isn't cheap in the first place. We have only been here 10 days but already we are going to a block party down the road; a Rye Newcomers association BBQ; have been contacted by the local Expat Connection mums group and chatted to our French-American neighbours who suggested we all take our kids to the local amusement park, so it is pretty friendly! DH has a 20 minute walk (-unless I drive him!) to the train station and a 40 minute train ride into Manhattan which is actually better than when we were in St Albans and he worked in London but unfortunately he does longer hours here. There is plenty of rental property here so don't worry about that (-incidentally bugaboos are ridiculously popular in Manhattan but out here you need an off-roader if you're walking as no-one with kids does so the footpaths are terrible!) One thing that will limit your choice is if you want a fenced back garden. For me that was imperative and out of 28 properties that we looked at only 2 had fenced gardens (-one of which is the one we now live in). I loved Battery Park City, should you decide to stay in an apartment - the community of mums is fantastic and on your doorstep in the playgrounds, plus there are lots of free activities for kids in the parks during the summer (-toys, art, stories, etc). I think it is also the cheapest area of Manhattan due to the fact that so many people moved away after September 11th. I did feel a little isolated in terms of not feeling able to explore the city due to there being very few lifts/ escalators on the metro and not being able to manage two small children and a double buggy on my own but you may be fine due to living in London! Anyway, I hope that helps and if you have any questions or you move over here then let me know! Good Luck

Oh and I have changed my settings so that you can CAT me now if you fancy Seabird

Hi Pegasus and thanks for your post. Glad to hear you sounding so settled. Our move got cancelled in the end (though may still happen in the future) which I was a mixture of relieved and disappointed about. Funnily enough I had been very drawn towards Rye - sounds v friendly!
If we do come next year I will definitely CAT you