PG in France, don't like my gynie!

[SharpLily]

Hello all, new to MN but trying to take it all in.

Am 7+2 and met my consultant for the first time yesterday for a reassurance/dating scan. Here's the thing: I didn't like him at all.

Generally the chemistry wasn't right but I was particularly concerned about his attitude to one issue. When I asked about the procedure for trisomie testing, he explained my risk will be assessed at 12 weeks and I will be offered an amnio if it is deemed necessary. I asked about the possibility of alternative testing methods and he said there were none. I referenced the new blood tests and CVS and he was most put out, asking me how I knew about such things - it seemed a bit redundant to point out that it's all over the freaking internet and I'd read a long article all about it in Parents magazine while sitting in his waiting room!

So again I asked if these things were possible and his response was that I don't need to know about them - when the time comes my risk will be assessed, I will be offered the amnio if necessary and I don't need to know any more than that.

Now I realise that medical care is rather prescriptive in France, the doctor will tell you what's what and the good woman will listen, nod meekly and do as she's told. The thing is, I'm not very good at standing up for myself and I'm worried that I'll spend this pregnancy with healthcare professionals riding roughshod all over me, as has happened in the past with unpleasant consequences.

Should I find myself another gynie (I was referred to this one by my GP) and if so, how would I go about doing so? Or do I keep my mouth shut and give this one another chance?

I would find another. You don't need a referral for a gynaecologist in France, it's not like other specialists. You could just pick one off the Ameli website, or ask friends or colleagues, or on a forum like Doctissimo but god the tickers on there are awwwwwwful. Whereabouts in France are you?

I agree, find another. Ask around if you can.

56 - it's Dr Duchesne at the Polyclinique in Pontivy.

Definitely find another gynae. If you can find a SF liberale in your town who has the same outlook on pregnancy and birth as you then she'll probably be able to tell you where to find a gynae you'll get on with better.

I don't know of anywhere that does Harmony testing in France. Both pregnancies I've had NT scan at 12 weeks plus bloods to give me an overall risk but not had the results back until the 20wk scan which means an amnio anyway as it's past the CVS cutoff. If you want something different you'll definitely need to look around for someone else quickly.

If the worst cones to the worst you only need to see this gynae for the 3 scans and your monthly appointments can be with a MW.

I didn't like mine either (head of department, came highly recommended) but hadn't plucked up the courage to do anything about it when the medical secretary accidently booked me with a different one who was lovely. So after that I just asked for appointments with him. He was of African origin and from his accent I'd say he moved to France as an adult and I think that was a definite advantage.

Are you signed up for a maternity yet? I could see the midwife for the monthly appointments at the maternity and get te scans done at an independant x-ray/scan place.

But its very easy to change gynes in France. Just find one on the internet and ring for an appointment!

I'm on my fourth through various moves/not feeling comfortable witht the person and its no problem.

As everyone else has said, it's easy to change, doctors do tend to be paternalistic in France but not all are. IME younger ones tend to be better, not always of course!

The thing is, it's quit probable that I will go with the risk assessment followed by amnio routine if necessary anyway. What I didn't like as being told I don't need to know about any other options. Excuse me? We're talking about potentially risky, invasive procedures upon my body and baby here. I would say it's not only my right but my responsibility to make sure I'm informed about the choices available.

Then there's the way he waggled the vaginal probe around like a lumberjack throwing an axe at a tree. Husband winced and crossed his legs and I had a sore cervix all day.

Thank you all for your advice, I will be moving on. I don't want to ask around as, having had two miscarriages, we're not telling ANYONE about this for a while yet. But I will make some investigations, then maybe carry out an interview process - "what makes you the best candidate to deal with my vagina?" .

Yes, it's perfectly ok to change. I had my first smear in France, and came out feeling like a well-scrubbed kitchen floor - and bled for 3 days afterwards. I told my gp, and he recommended another at the same clinic, and he was much better. He was a bit surprised when I told him I'd never seen stirrups before - except on a horse.

Sadly this sounds par for the course in France. My friend didn't like her OB at all, but she did like the midwives who were also part of the practice - she said they were much easier to talk to, and I think she saw them for quite a lot of her antenatal appointments instead of the OB. Could you find a practice that also employs midwives so you have a slightly more balanced experience?