2013 ist schon da! A new Kaffeeklatsch thread for the New Year - living in Germany and Austria

[LinzerTorte]

All welcome - whether you're living in Germany or Austria, have questions about life in those countries or just want to chat.

Previous thread here.

outnumbered I called another Kinderarzt yesterday afternoon (who I've spoken to before when ours has been on holiday) and they just said that without knowing exactly what it is their advice would be to keep him away from other children too. His spots are looking better this afternoon though so I think I'll make a decision tomorrow night, or at least warn PILs tomorrow night and make a decision on Saturday morning.
Hope today has been less stressful now you only have DS3 at home with you. Is he any better? Hope the fever has gone away and that he's not suffering any more, poor thing.

hupa The child safety course sounds really interesting. Role-play is a really good way to teach these things I think. When will your DC have the lessons?

DS is ridiculously friendly and loves people to the extent that when we were out for our walk this morning and stopped to talk to an old lady we have never seen before he started jumping up and down in front of her with his arms up wanting her to pick him up. I don't want him to be scared of other people but the way he is at the moment gives me the most awful nightmares sometimes. I might start handcuffing him to me when we're out and about....

Go Ploom! 8lbs is really impressive :) I've just had a quick google and it seems Fulda is a good hour and a half away from here by car, so it might be a little too far for us for soft play. Glad the skiing went well!

cheas I've been thinking of watching Homeland - I presumed they were showing the first series on tv (I think it starts this weekend). How come you've had to cancel all your concerts?

Hello to everyone else!

ploom 8lbs is wonderful. That is what I would like to lose, how did you do it? Must google how far fulda is from linzer and me .

antique hope the rash clears in time. I am slowly beginning to accept that children's illnesses really come at the most inconvenient of times...did you ever learn klingon and start your socks, btw?

aha....not sure what happened there....but here goes the rest of my post....

outnumbered I hope illnesses clear for the weekend and you get a little break. I can't believe the kindergarten not taking autism seriously. what did you say? ds's kita is mixed- some of the staff is engaged, while others sit at the desk and don't do much. Still it is better than the first one we had when we got here...the staff would sit behind a desk in a corner of a room, read a magazine with a cofee and every now and then shout (and I mean shout): " was soll das?" .

Your kindergarten sounds wonderful mrtumbles though dd's teacher sounds a bit demanding.

cheas I read some of the katy says blog and it seems really intersting. dd1 is having physio and I am learning all sorts of things about backs and posture, fascinating. Shocking to see how much correcting dd1 needs -she is not my finest creation - we will need physio for ages by the looks of it. And that is expensive but not something to save on really.

nutella good to hear your little one is doing well! Hope the little spots clear...

hupa that talk sounds good. as others have asked, why in english?

admylin fingers crossed on applications. It sounds like your dh deserved that chance at a second childhood!

weiss - hope dh likes his present! sounds like you put a lot of thought into it - very touching!

our dc only watch tv on sat morning...it seems to work okay. They don't ask for it at other times, but they do ask to use the computer or play on my mobile at other times. I limit that, but dd1 in particular gets really stroppy about it so I am wondering if clear times when it is and it is not allowed is better...

I am off to read my book...had an eventful dinner time with dd1 provoking and provoking and provoking some more. then dd2 choked on a piece of carrot - proper choking and lots of thumping to remove it. Have since googled and learnt the Heimlich maneuver - I did know about it but only about half of it came to me in my first response. Luckily as I tipped her down and thumped, the piece flew out.

Hope you all have peaceful evenings and nights

Did think it might be a bit far for a day out antique - ah well maybe we'll all meet up another time.

platanos - I use the MyFitnessPal app to log what I eat every day - it really makes you think how many calories are in some foods. Some of it is an educated guess since its a UK app but it definitely works. I've also been walking lots & uploaded a pedometer app yesterday that loads the exercise straight onto myfitnesspal - was very impressed. But I try to not eat the extra calories I gain from exercising - treat them just as weight loss ones. I've never been as heavy as I was by January this year so am determined to get back down to the weight I was when I moved to Germany.

Hello only got my mobile to post this so can't name check properly.

Thank you for all the well wishes for poorly children! Ds3 is ok. If I had to go out to work, he'd probably be already back at kiga. He's just got a runny nose and a bit of the cough left. But as I am home anyway I thought I'd give him a few more days to get his immune system the chance to toughen up again before rejoining the germ factory

hupa could it be that the Erzieherschülerin had to write the essay in English because it was for her English lesson? (Sorry sounds like a stupid question). Afaik Erzieherschule is like a Berufsschule, this the school-based part for an apprenticeship. And I believe English as a language is mandatory, no matter which apprenticeship you do. And I guess part of their homework in English could be an essay ; and having that essay on something Erzieher related would make most sense for them?

platanos tbh there isn't any point saying anything to the staff at kiga. I initially told the Leitung and she just looked at me with big eyes saying 'really???? We don't see any autistic traits in him whatsoever' and then went on about that one child with asker gets they once at the kiga. She really thinks she knows it all as she is also convinced that ds1 would be fine at their kiga and doesn't need to be at the integrativen kiga. She has net him twice, both for roughly 5 mins, in which he was hiding behind my back not saying a word or looking at anyone. She obviously thinks that's what he is like all the time sure, that's why we get all that very expensive help at home, he gets 4 different kinds of therapy at kiga etc etc.

But one thing I have learned on my journey that us living with autism is that I have to choose my battles wisely. And this kiga is not worth the battle. I tried several times to make them see ds2 difficulties and explained his behavior. But they still describe him as 'extrem dickköpfig' and 'ein bisschen eigen' etc. it's a lost cause and I have better use for the little bit of energy I have

platanos and linzer do you think more therapy is covered by German authorities and health insurance than Austrian ones? Am just thinking about linzer having to pay for dyslexia training herself and platanos for physio? We are getting OT, Salt, autism therapy and play therapy... And most of it will be long term. But we don't have to pay anything towards it.

ploom wow well done on the weight loss!!! Mine just isn't shifting with exercise alone so I think I may actually have to try some sort of diet for the first time in my life. What did you do?

Sorry I can't rely scroll up and down and can't remember any more posts from the top of my head. But a big hello to everyone else!!

Ah ploom xposts

I wanted to reply but I can't remember what I have read... Hmmm

We watched Homelands, series 1 and 2, agree you need to watch the first series to "get" the second, its not a dip in and out kind of thing really.

Well done on the weight loss Ploom I have loads to lose and joined a slimming group, I go to the gym 3 times a week but I cannot get motivated (or rather stay motivated) food wise, I really need to get my act together. I lost nothing the first week, a couple of lb the 2nd, and nothing since - bit of a non event so far! I have tried MyfitnessPal but found (like when I did WW in the UK) it makes me think/ obsess about food all the time, which I don't like - I may have to go back to it though as not tracking in order to avoid obsessing seems to also mean avoiding losing any weight!

Antique hope DS's rash clears in time for your weekend

Nutella your DS sounds lovely - my DD was 4100 at birth but only 50cm long - that's what pudgy looks like :o The boys were 3860 and 3870g newborns and both 54cm long - so almost the same size your DS is now - DS2 was somehow the leanest looking though, despite being almost the identical size to his brother... DS1 is the same size as DD now, even though he is 2 years younger, showing the meaninglessness of birth weight!

I shall now wander off to bed - we are back to bedtime taking 2 hours for DS2 - he told his first lie today, he would not settle in bed and I was holding him down (by cuddling him) in his bed to stop him jumping on and off the bed when he was meant to be asleep - first he was howling and struggling, then he stopped and announced "Done a poo! Need a change! Cumon, done a poo!" so I had no choice but to change his nappy - got him on the changing table, nappy off, nothing - clean and dry, I looked DS2 in they eyes and he grinned a huge grin and shouted "No Poo! Downstairs now!" then burst out laughing! Cheeky little monkey - am I allowed to be proud of him for a first deliberate lie at 21 months? :)

Meant to say outnumbered I realise you want to maintain the parent networking opportunities at your local KiGa, but is there no option of leaving your DS3 there and moving your DS2 to where Ds1 is? It sounds as if being where he is now is really not very positive for him, if they call him things like extrem dickköpfig, as well as not doing much with the kids in general... Does he get anything at all out of being there, if due to his ASD he is not a child who naturally just joins in and plays with others if left to himself?

mrtumbles that's the exact conclusion we have reached. His current kiga is def better than him being at home, as he does have to socialice to a degree. Also about 80 or more % in his group a girls, and they do seem to teach him some social skills. BUT he is not getting nearly as much out if kiga as he could be, plus I just don't like my ds2 being seen as 'der dickköpfige'... To cut the long story short... Yes we will most probably move ds2 to ds1 pre school and leave ds3 at the current one. I do feel slightly guilty for leaving ds3 there though, but at least the children and parents there are lovely. That change won't be happening until the new kiga year though.

Sorry your ds2 bedtime has got so difficult (and tiring for you) again. Are the nights why better though once he is asleep? [hopeful emoticon] I did have to though at his cheekiness. And I was at your dc birth weights!! Ouch ouch! Ds1 was our heaviest at 3380! Ds2 was 2730 and ds3 2830.

Must proofread, must proofread, must proofread...

mrtumbles impressed and at your cheeky DS telling you a lie. It's amazing how quick they learn some tricks to get exactly what they want! (My nephew & niece are extreme pros when it comes to having their way)

outnumbered sorry to hear about the stark differences between kigas. Hope DS2 moves easily to DS1's Kiga and that DS3 is well enough on Monday and all three boys go to Kiga! Well done on dry January!!

ploom impressive weight loss, very well done! I'm looking forward to losing the pregnancy weight (about 9 kilos, but then I still need to lose another 10 kilos after that ) I'd really like to get back in some normal jeans... Ho hum... Will order a size up from usual so that I at least have that option.

DS is cute and screamy and trying really hard to make my nipples longer but I am counting down the next 8 weeks ish hoping that the three month mark will see an end to his belly pain. There are some little smiles happening and the odd bit of mimicking - I think.

Just a quick post as this is my last chance to get any work done in peace for a while (Semesterferien here next week). The DC are very excited about getting their Zeugnisse today (DS was asking whether he'll get a present if he gets "all oners" ) and DS's friend's mum just said that her DS is the same, despite not even knowing what a Zeugnis is (he thought they'd have to take some kind of test, apparently).

outnumbered I'm not sure whether German health insurance covers more as I don't have enough experience of the system there, but DH had physiotherapy for his back last year and it was covered by the Krankenkasse (do you know why yours won't be, platanos?), DS's speech therapy was covered and I know they pay for ergotherapy too, so it's pretty good on the whole. It does seem you're better off in Germany if you're dyslexic, however, as schools seem to take more account of it and we have to fork out for the training ourselves here - does the Krankenkasse cover your DD's therapy, admylin? It would be covered if we had a Zusatzversicherung or the Jugendamt would pay if we couldn't afford it, but neither of those apply to us.

platanos Will PM you later about Friday - DD1 is already looking forward to some sticker swapping!

ploom Well done on the weight loss, that's brilliant. I really need to do something about my diet as it's so unvaried and also need to start running again - I have no excuses now the snow has melted and I've got my brace.

Nutella Things definitely improved with DD1 around the 2.5/3 month mark wrt reflux/tummy pain; fingers crossed you won't have much longer to wait!

linzer that's a bit sad that your ds and his friends know they want to get 1s even though they don't understand what it means yet, isn't it?

mrtumbles at your ds2's lie. Funnily enough, dd also made up a story about having pooed on the floor yesterday - the hesitation and barely concealed grin gave the game away though.

nutella I'll cross my fingers for you as well. My parents reckon I cried non-stop for the first 3 months with tummy pain and then never cried again and started sleeping 12 unbroken hours a night, or some equally believable story - hope your ds does the same .

It took me about a year to get back into my pre-pregnancy trousers and probably even longer to get into some of the slimmer pairs tbh. I actually weighed more soon after giving birth than before - I think down to water retention, which I didn't really have while pg. A combination of sleep deprivation and bf meant I had absolutely no chance of trying to diet though - I was getting through a whole bar of sickly filled Lindt chocolate every single day .

ploom how does the pedometer app work? Can you just carry the ipod around and it tells you how far you've wallked??? I could really do with that!

platanos I've found reading the stuff about posture and alignment on Katy Says really interesting too and have been looking at dd to see how she's doing. I liked the fb page and they immediately posted a blog link written by a musician about how playing instruments changes alignment. There were photos of the blogger's dd as a 4yo - with the insides of her elbows pointing forward (I never knew this was actually correct shoulder alignment ) and then a year or so later after starting to learn the violin. The mum mananged to counteract the tendency by doing a lot of hanging from monkey bars and climbing ropes and things with her kids - hence my interest in gymnastic rings, as dd's shoulders are already sloping and rotated forward at 3 1/2 .

antique it's just been bad luck that I've had to turn down so many concerts. The first call came on Jan 2nd while we were in the UK, other things have clashed with dh being away, so I haven't had the car, or childcare. We're going to Austria towards the end of March, which has knocked out two weekends, too - Obergurgl isn't anyway near Baden, is it, linzer?

Weissdorn 9-5 is very impressive for a seven week old; I don't think mine were managing that even at seven months (although they did go to bed earlier).

cheas Sadly no, Obergurgl is right over in the west, so almost as far from us as it's possible to get. Our neighbours are going skiing in Tirol next week and I don't envy them the journey. Or the skiing, for that matter.

I find the whole Zeugnis thing both depressing and annoying. DD1 and DS were having a discussion last night about who was the best in their class (that Klassenbeste/r thing again). There are a few lots of good things about the Austrian education system, but all the fuss about Zeugnisse isn't one of them.

While I remember, I keep meaning to ask Ploom and cheas whether you'd have any objections to me putting photos of our summer meet-up (including DC) on FB. I won't be offended if not! I've been meaning to add some summer photos for months, and am hoping to get round to it before this summer.

linzer I don't mind, but will your dd1?

weissdorn agree that 9-5 is amazing. Speaking from experience, you can get used to waking at 5 every morning...

In dd's class one of the mums is totally against fb because her dh went to a talk about it and it was all negative and dangerous and we should all avoid it. They obviously didn't know about privacy settings at the talk at all.

Her dd is the only one now who isn't on the fb class group where they exchange tips and ask about homework etc. One teacher even said let your dc go on fb but make sure you're one of their friends and you can see what's going on.

How was the Stimmung after report hand out Linzer? My ds was happy, even got a 2 in art when he can't draw to save himself and hates all arts and crafts and dd was depressed for a couple of days but managed to convince her that her report is actually quite good and she can be proud of herself. Pity for her, she still compares herself to ds alot.

I wonder what Obergurgl means!

weissdorn glad you liked the film, the book is much better! I loved the Call the Midwife series - should I pass it on to someone on here maybe?

I noticed Homeland is strating on German TV this week or next. I've probably missed the first one but I'll try and watch that - make a change from the endless Krimis that my family watch. They're even watching Navy CIS for the third time round.

admylin - I love Call the Midwife. The next series has just started in Britain - I watched the one that was on on Sunday and was properly sobbing. Its just so well acted and seems so realistic of the 1950's. I never got into Downton Abbey weissdorn but everyone seems to rave about it. Impressed at your dd's sleeping - my ds1 was like that and has continued to be the one who always sleeps every night through. Why arent they all like that? .

admylin - glad the dc did well in their reports (even if your dd didnt think so). Are you're dc zufrieden linzer?

cheas - the pedometer was a free app called runtastic pedometer. It works well but the main problem is the screen has to be on so it sucks the battery life out my phone so not sure it would be something to have running all day. My sister had one that ran in the background of the phone so she could add up how many steps she did all day which would be better. Must ask her about it.

mrtumbles - good on you for joining a slimming group. I agree that when doing Myfitnesspal you become obsessed with food but I think in order to lose weight whatever the method then you have to become a bit obsessive to start off with. I need to be reminded that eating those crisps will probably take me over my calorie limit for the day and I didnt really need them anyway. I need to be organised to buy decent healthy low calorie food so I agree I am thinking about food more often at the moment but if it makes the weight come off then I'm happy . I was really amused by your ds2's little lie - he will do anything to wiggle out going to bed. Hoep the bedtimes get shorter soon.

nutella - fingers crossed that nutellachen's belly pain gets better soon. How have the inlaws been this week?

outnumbered - well done on your dry January . Do you think it'll change how you drink in the future? I've cut even further down while trying to shift the pounds - didnt even get thro half of one bottle of wine last weekend. Dont want to give it up completely tho - have to have some fun in life .

Our weather is as rotten as weissdorn's - think I hate rain more than snow - at least there's some fun to be had in the snow. Hope its not like this all weekend. Boys have just been to the hairdresser - there are nearly no amenities in our wee village but there is a hairdresser on our street so after our previous hairdresser closed I decided to take the boys there. So much easier than another trip in the car.

Anyone got any exciting plans for the weekend? Its Kappenabend in the village hall on Saturday night - dd is dancing at it. Think I'm just going to go to watch her then come home - never totally understand the rest of it - but apart from that we've no plans .

Ha ha platanos I started with a scarf - I realised socks were far too ambitious for a first attempt! DS has a thing about owls at the moment and I've found a pattern for an owl egg cosy, but I suspect by the time I get around to knitting it he will have lost interest.

platanos The choking incident sounded scary!

admylin I've just had a look and Homeland starts on German tv on Sunday night. It sounds like it might be the first series but I'm not sure. I plan on watching it but I'm not sure how long I'll last with the dubbing...
It's good your DD could be proud of her report.

MrTumbles Aww at your DS2 for his first lie! Very cute. Love the cheekiness!

cheas I love some of the Austrian place names; Obergurgl is a great name! (I was particularly impressed by Großklein last time we were in Austria.)

Linzer It does sound like an awful lot of pressure on the DC regarding Zeugnisse and Klassenbeste/r, especially at such a young age. Hope your DC come out with the grades they hoped for!

Nutella I hope the belly pain clears up soon! It's so hard to see them in pain and not to be able to help them, isn't it?

Weissdorn I'm in two minds as to whether to bother watching series three of Downton Abbey.

outnumbered Well done for your dry January!

It's rotten weather here too, Ploom and apparently it's going to stay that way for a while, yuck!

The rash is looking paler and the spots are smaller so I'm packing DS and DH off to the PILs as planned this weekend. DH and his family are all convinced I am being over-cautious (which, let's face it, I probably am) so off he goes and if any of them end up ill I will be practising my smug face

Strike through fail!