How do you cope with the visitors?

[stickybean]

I'll start by saying I know I am probably being unreasonable... I'm just having a little vent, feel free to ignore me!

We live in New York but are both British. I have 2 young kids and another on the way. People come and stay with us ALL the time. I reckon we have guests 50-60% of the time. Some months we'll have no one and then we can have a month or two where we are 3 or 4 different guests back to back.
Mostly it's not too bad and I just get on with it but I'm reaching my limit. I don't want to make polite conversation, I don't want to cook every night... I want to eat cereal for dinner.
I don't want to find a free night to go out. I want to stay at home, watch TV and go to bed.

When people come for a week it's ok but after that I reach my limit. One of my siblings is here for 3 weeks at the moment... It's killing me. There is a reason we don't live with our siblings as adults. Don't even get me started on my mother.

I know I just need to say NO when people ask to come and stay or set strict time limits. But it's easier said then done. I am crap at confrontation so just quietly seeth.

I don't even know what I'm asking... Share your stories, tell me how to deal with it or to suck it up. Or that it's the price you pay for moving precious grandchildren / nieces nephews across the globe and tough luck.

Just venting really.
Sorry for typos, can't proof read on my phone.

[strictlycaballine]

[sorry - rushing - should have proof-read that properly before posting..]

[AdoraJingleBells]

We don't get many visitors we're not only too far away but obviously we're in the middle of the jungle with all the associated bugs and nasties because that's all south America has to offer. Anyway, I'm a lazy bolshi hostess who refuses to bend over backwards to accommodate uninvited guests. This means the few visitors we have had, one repeat offender visitor has been here 6 times, don't treat our home like a hotel.

You need to decide weather you are going to suck it up and vent on MN (nothing wrong with having a rant on here) or set some boundaries and stick to them.

[stickybean]

AdoraJingleBelles: suck it up or set some boundaries... I know which one I should do and I know which one I probably will
I am too non confrontational for my own good.

Spending all my time hiding in my room at the moment and then feeling like the worlds biggest bitch just for feeling how I do.
My family is so blooming high maintenance. Sometimes I think moving across the Atlantic was the best thing for me... Then someone else comes to stay and I'm not so sure!

[RichardSimmonsTankTop]

Like Adora we're also in South America but have about six sets of guests booked throughout the next six months. They're all lovely people but I'm a bit nervous about reading this.

Does anyone else find that well meaning family members have offered you as free accommodation? My sister emailed me a few weeks ago saying "X, y and z are coming to your city in March, May and June and I've said they can stay with you." NO THANKS.

[EdwardtheEagle]

Being non confrontational means you're putting other people's family before your own. Are they worth that?

[Lavenderhoney]

Not having a spare room helps now :) although I would love people to come, when they do its crap. I dont want to cook dinner party dinners at night, and prefer to eat with the dc at 6. The only person I know who copes with visitors fabulously is mil, and she just does her thing. Sometimes she peeks in our bedroom and rolls her eyes at the mess but she knows I am untidy in there only. I also buy her loads of magazines and treats which she wont do for herself. She doesn't go on trips etc, but will supply picnics:) then she puts her feet up and gets her friends round for a good moan:)