Der Nebel steigt, es fällt das Laub - a German and Austrian autumn thread

[AntiqueMuppet]

A thread for anyone living in Germany or Austria, or anyone else who fancies a chat.

Previous thread here

[WhatWouldVegansDo]

:)

[worldcitizen]

I was down there for about 7 years and was most of that time in Frankfurt, where I was extremely happy, a few months in Wiesbaden and 2 years in Bad Nauheim, but was a lot in Wiesbaden due to friends and uni mates living there at the time, one of my best and dearest friends still lives in Wiesbaden, where she's from, and I still visit once in a while, but next visit is her turn and I'm planning to be back down next spring.

I liked the beautiful and green neighbourhood Bornheim in Frankfurt as it was quite alternative and eco-minded with loads of Vegetarian and health food restaurants at a time where Frankfurt was really know to be a place for all the finance and banking types.

Wiesbaden is really beautiful and the quality of life there is amazing!!!!!! And adding all the benefits of having Frankfurt close by, it was wonderful.

[itsMYNutella]

admylin it's a thing in Südstadt somewhere... I think it is at a sports club near the edge of the Eilenriede... There was something on the poster about 5? for a tisch but I assumed that only applies if you want to set up a stall... DP thought it was a donation thingy... We shall see!

Bienchen thank you for your retort I will be writing it out on many post-it's and then either saying it to or :o sticking it on people! Now can you help me, what can I say when people ask (what I previously considered was a neat bump) if I am having twins? Of course if anyone else has any ideas please I need help! Preggo brain and not practising German enough is definitely having an impact
Although, sorry if I've posted this before... But I heard a message I left for DP on our answer phone and I really do sound Dutch!

[worldcitizen]

Hey nutella, I believe you've mentioned that before about people sometimes assuming you're being Dutch when we talked about where others would place us when they hear us speaking, someone said their German husband sounds Australian to others...

To your bump and twin question I am afraid I don't have much helpful to suggest as no-one has ever asked me that and it wouldn't occur to me to ask this directly, as much as I don't ask a woman if she's pregnant either...
Guess it depends what you generally would like to say, so maybe if you would share which tone and message you would like to get across?!

[CakeBump]

That's mine world, and I think Ploom's as well?

I don't know how he managed to get an Aussie accent to stick after just a few months in Australia and NZ - he lived in the NE of England for 18 months and luckily doesn't sound Geordie!!

Right, going to have a proper catch up with this thread now...

[CakeBump]

Nutella is so weird how people comment on your bump. I can have a week of everyone saying "you're huge!" and then I'll meet up with friends and they'll say "aren't you lucky to have a small bump!"

So, I just ignore :) I'm also not very good with having German "platitudes" ready, by which I mean all that conversational sort of "yes, well, it's growing each day" or "oh right, well I seem to have plateau'd at the moment".... instead I just stand there, nodding dumbly at whatever they say....

I've found one more stallholder now for the craft fair next weekend - I'm stupidly nervous about it; hoping that people come, hoping it's worth it for the stallholders, hoping there's enough on the stalls to keep the customers happy....argh!!

Enjoy the weekend everyone

[worldcitizen]

Hello cakebump you enjoy your weekend as well . I am off in a couple hours myself, spending the weekend in Lübeck/Travemünde...and then from Monday on it's going to get quite dense at work...

Best wishes for the craft fair

[LinzerTorte]

Hope everyone is having a slightly more exciting weekend than me (stuck on the computer) and that you have a good trip world. I wrote half a post last night but pressed the Back button by mistake and lost it; I've forgotten most of what I wrote now, but hi to Cheddar and achillea. Is hupa still around? I think she's in Hessen somewhere.

Antique Hope the viewing goes well; it sounds very exciting. Are you in a flat at the moment?

admylin Hope your DH got back OK. Montreal sounds good; good luck with his application.

Nutella Maybe you could say no, it's triplets. Almost all our baby stuff was second hand; I think the only things you're supposed to buy new are the car seat and cot mattress. Babies grow out of clothes so quickly that it's fairly easy to find good quality second-hand stuff and we hardly had to buy anything for DS when he was a baby as we had so much passed on to us.

Cake Oh, I'm exactly the same with the platitudes; I still really struggle with German small talk, particularly if I don't really know someone.

Right, my coffee is finished so must get back to work!

[admylin]

I think hupa is in Hessen Linzer, and I knew antique lived in Wiesbaden but that shows my German geography skills are zero as I didn't think that was Hessen! And that'S despite having helped both dc learn all the Länder and Hauptstädte for geography in year 5! Good luck with the house antique.

cake good luck with the event, have you advertised in the local paper?
world have a nice weekend away. I was just saying that when dd is atleast 14 and ds 15 I might be able to go on these business trips with dh and leave them for 3 days to get on with it! Or maybe not...
cheddar my dd spent a whole year of silence at kindergarden too. She just suddenly started talking perfect German one day! Hope you get a place sorte dout as soon as possible.

Dh got back OK, on time and not too fed up. He did meet an old colleague who was given dh's work to use as his own and also got a big prize (money) from the boss for it. Dh didn't hesitate to tell him he can't really be proud of what he had achieved considering he didn't even understand half of the work. The man doesn't care though as he's a surgeon and only wants his title (Dozent).

[LinzerTorte]

I didn't realise that Wiesbaden is in Hessen either, despite having been there. I'm hopeless at geography, so I'm glad we only have nine Länder and capitals to learn here. Both DDs had to learn them all in year 2, but that was nothing compared to the challenge of learning the national anthem off by heart (I've rarely come across a more impossible tune).

It must be so frustrating for your DH to see others rewarded for his work. Fingers crossed another job will turn up soon.

[WhatWouldVegansDo]

I really think most comments on bumps is just people awkwardly trying to make conversation, sound interested, be polite.

admylin, that is so atrocious about your husband's work being stolen. Aargh, so unfair. I hope the people responsible get their comeuppance.

[LinzerTorte]

I agree Vegans. I remember when SIL's DS was little, saying something to her about how big he was and she replied, "No, not really, he's average for his age." I just meant that he'd grown and was trying to make conversation, but I can't remember whether I bothered explaining!

[TheEnglishWomanInTheAttic]

Nutella it's when people comment on your bump and you aren't pregnant you have to worry (check out lady at the local small supermarket I've been going to for years congratulated me on expecting DC4 a couple of months ago - I wasn't... I don't wear that dress any more ) The midwife in the UK told me DD would be at least 11lb based on the size of my bump and sent me for a late scan at about 37 weeks thinking I should be induced early - she wasn't small but she wasn't that big (9lb at 42 weeks) but there was a lot of water... How the baby is lying does affect how big your bump looks too though, and if the baby moves from lying horizontally to vertically your bump can actually go from looking very big to much smaller and neater (and vice versa of course) that happened to me with DC2 and people asked if he'd shrunk I knew he'd moved though as horizontal at 30+ weeks was uncomfortable!

admylin how unbelievably frustrating for your DH, don't know how he keeps his temper when that happens to him over and over :( Really hope he finds a job where he is treated with more respect soon.

[CakeBump]

Its next Sunday everyone! :) (the craft fair I mean!)

Yes, we've advertised in two local papers and I've put half a dozen posters up around town... fingers crossed!

We've got roadworks outside the restaurant at the moment so although its nice and sunny here, it's not very peaceful....

admylin that's crap about your DH's work! Can he complain to the bosses?

Linzer there are so many times when I say something in coversation, the other person gets totally the wrong and of the stick, and I can't be bothered to try to explain (way too complicated plus the other person just gets embarrassed) so I just pretend it was what I meant all along :)

English at people asking if your DS had shrunk! I'm 28 weeks now and getting to the stage where a head and random limbs are actually poking out a bit, it's most odd but never fails to fascinate me. I'm constantly saying to DH "look look!!" :)

[Ploom]

linzer - my saturday hasnt been too exciting either. Dh is on call and we were all lazy this morning so all we did was collect some chestnuts. Then this afternoon he keeps trying to get me involved in gardening which I hate. Thankfully ds1 helped him instead.

cake - have got my fingers crossed that next saturday goes well. If I was nearer I'd come along. Being 28 weeks is such a fun part of pregnancy - you look pregnant but dont feel as sick as the beginning or as exhausted as at the end.

admylin - thats so rubbish about that man stealing your dh's work but good on your dh for saying something to him about it.

I also agree vegans - people just want to make small talk so say something about your bump. But they forget that they're probably the 10th person to say it that day which is why you look a bit fed up. I also agree one person says "oh isnt your bump big" then the next says "oh arent you neat for x months". Grrrr. The consultant when I was induced with ds2 said to me "oh havent you got a lovely neat bump - dont think it'll be a big baby" 6 hours later ds2 arrived at 10lbs 13oz!!!! So not even the doctors get their comments right.

welcome cheddar. I'm not far from the border to Hessen (in Bayern) but not anywhere near where you're moving to.

[itsMYNutella]

The funny thing about it all is that even in adult life it isn't as if we are all the same height and weight so why should bumps or children conform to some perception of "standard" size... ah well. As long as it's healthy :o that's the most important.

Good luck with the craft thingy Cake! Well done on getting it organised, fingers crossed you get plenty of interest in it. And you're a week ahead of me, I'm 27+3 today. Has your DH tried listening for the heartbeat? I read somewhere it should be possible. DP tried it and got a pummelling in the the face :o , he was quite surprised at how hard the little bean is kicking now :)

Welcome Cheddar! I'm also not near Hessen I'm afraid. But I hope you get settled in quickly and painlessly (as much as possible).

[Ploom]

nutella - comments when your pregnant are just the start of it. People feel compelled to say something about your childs height nearly every time they see them. I've stopped saying it to other parents now unless the other person makes a comment about their own dc cause I know how annoying it is. If one more person says to me "oh isnt your ds1 tall!" I KNOW HE'S TALL!!!!!! Do you think i've never looked at him before!!!! and breathe

So I have a million jobs to do so feel free to shout at me if you see me on here again this morning.

[LinzerTorte]

I think I'm spectacularly unobservant as I don't really notice whether children are tall or short unless I see them with their whole class (it was only then that I realised that DD1 is short for her age). One of my friends said people are always commenting on her tall her DS is but I must admit I'd never noticed. I didn't notice that your DS is tall either Ploom, just that your DD was head and shoulders above DD1 (is she really only about five months older than her or have I got completely confused?). Maybe it's because being tall is seen as something positive that people are more inclined to comment about it; I never get comments about the DC being short! Can understand it must be quite annoying, though.

Hope everyone had a good weekend. I spent about half of it working, but we managed to get out yesterday and went to an "amethyst world", very similar to the fossil world we went to a couple of weeks ago. There was an area where you could dig for amethysts, but I got bored after about five minutes so left DH and the DC to it and sat in the sunshine and read my book for the rest of the hour!

Cake Oh yes, I've done that plenty of times; pretending that's what I meant all along just seems like the easiest option most of the time!

Ploom I hate gardening too; the house is enough work for me! Luckily DH enjoys it and the DC are usually quite happy to help him. The digging yesterday was just too much like gardening for me!

[cheaspicks]

ploom ha ha I must really irritate lots of people, as I comment on pretty much any child DD's age or younger when they are taller than she is. It's as much marvelling at her being so short as much as anything, but it's probably still annoying to the other mums .

Anyway, Nutella, despite dd being a small baby (2900g/6lb 6oz) and me not putting on much weight in pregnancy (8kg in total), I still had a comment at about 20 weeks from a dr who said "I would have put you closer to 24 weeks".

Must go and nag dd to get dressed. Hopefully back later, since I'm slightly less busy than I was last week!

[cheaspicks]

Linzer that's funny, I also noticed the difference between your and ploom's dds far more than I've noticed her ds1 being tall. I don't know whether I'm generally unobservant, or just don't know enough 7/8 yos to compare with (probably the first, though, tbh).

I may have scared off that bit of proofreading work, oops. It took me 2 1/2 hours to do the bit they sent through, so I wrote to my contact saying that I had asked a professional translator friend what I should be charging and suggested an hourly rate at the bottom end of what you indicated, which happens to be what I charge for private teaching. I also said I would do the first bit for less, since I'd given them the impression it would be much cheaper. My contact wrote back slightly snappily that they don't need a professional standard translation and so they prefer to use an unqualified native speaker because they are cheaper. She is going to speak to her boss tomorrow to see if they can afford my rate.

Do I write back and say I'm willing to go lower? I don't know if any of you read the thread in Freelancers a week or two ago about how to earn £1000 a month. It somehow turned into a very inspiring thread about not aiming too low - one brilliant tip was that when you name your fee to someone, they should squeak but then say yes. If they don't squeak, you've pitched too low. Maybe today's email was just the squeak!

[CakeBump]

cheas I hope it was a squeak!

My friend started that thread and has a facebook group too - are you a member? I can pass you the details on if not. She lives near me just over the border in Holland.

I had a freaky experience with baby movements on Saturday night Nutella - I was finding it hard to sleep so was awake much later than usual, and suddenly the baby started really wriggling. As I was lying on my side and had my arm draped over my tummy, it actually felt like a real baby in the bed with me! I must have been dozing as I shouted out and jumped in shock! It was really weird - it's almost like a ghostly presence; you're alone but not alone....

We had the first frost last night - just keeping my eyes peeled for sloes now to make sloe gin! I got hundreds last year but apparently this year isn't a good year for them.

[CakeBump]

sorry cheas in answer to your question, I would wait and see what they say. If they come back with a "no", then maybe go a bit lower?

[Ploom]

ok I've done most of my jobs - just waiting for the washing machine to finish load 1 of 3 for today so am having a cuppa and some MN.

Yes linzer - there is only 5 months between our dd1's but think mine is on the tall side and yours on the little side so the difference seemed quite huge. My dd is also developing boobs etc quite quickly which surprised me since I was def not an early developer (I still had a vest on in 1st year of high school ) so maybe thats also why she's taller. But am glad you and cheas didnt notice ds1 since his growth is the one that worries me (hint to me to stop worrying!).

cake - were you comforted or freaked out by your spooky baby movements last night? It might happen again after the baby is born - it def happened to me - dd1 was asleep in her cot and I woke scrambling around in the covers looking for dd thinking I'd lost her in the bed. Have heard this happen to others so I know I wasnt going crazy. Was freaky at the time tho.

So my other moan for a Monday morning - ds1's narky teacher wrote in his Hausaufgabenheft on Friday that his shorts for sport were too loose and for safety reasons he must always wear very tight ones . His shorts are just normal football shorts so have spent too much time over the weekend on the internet looking for them but the only ones I found were over 20 euros. Found some old ones of dd's - they're just grey on the outside but have a pink band on the inside so he wont wear them. So have been out this morning hunting for some but obviously its the wrong time of year. Have bought some black short leggings from NKD - they're girls ones but am hoping since they're plain black he'll wear them. Grrrr this teacher would drive a parent to drink!

[LinzerTorte]

cheas Oh, I get so annoyed by people thinking that as long as you're a native speaker, you can translate/teach, etc. I retranslated an Indian restaurant menu by someone who was a native speaker (apparently his parents had looked at it too!) and you wouldn't believe the mistakes in it; Cashewkerne had been translated as cashew seeds, for example. (That reminds of the phrase if you pay peanuts, you get monkeys...)

Re your question, I agree with Cake that you should wait and see what the boss's response is. It really depends on how much you want to do the work, I suppose. I ended up agreeing to a low rate for one agency when I started out and really regretted it afterwards when I found that other agencies were willing to pay about 60% more (even though I managed to negotiate them up by 5 cents a line) and treated me far better and with more respect too. It's definitely a good idea to aim high as you can always negotiate downwards but, as a freelancer, it can be quite difficult to put your prices up. If they offer a much lower rate than you asked for, I would see if you could negotiate them up a bit.

Cake The FB group sounds interesting - is it for freelancers?

[hupa]

Hello everyone. I´m finally back from my self imposed mumsnet ban. I´m quite impressed I managed to stick to it and I´ve manged to get loads done, so I´m going to try to limit myself to 30 minutes a day from now on. I think I´ve missed a whole thread and have only skimmed this thread so far. There´s a lot of new names, and maybe a couple of name changes to get my head around.

I am in Hessen, but up near Kassel, so not close to where you´ll be moving to Cheddar.

CakeBump I remember watching Alien when quite heavily pregnant and then wondering when my bump started moving if it was really a baby inside. I knew I was being ridiculous, but couldn´t get the thought out of my head for a few days.